


Never Surrender

by RabidFangirl03



Category: Supernatural
Genre: 13x17 coda, Angst, Fluff, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Post-Episode: s13e17 The Thing, pretty sure this also counts as a slow burn now
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-09
Updated: 2018-09-04
Packaged: 2019-04-20 14:16:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 43,837
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14262816
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RabidFangirl03/pseuds/RabidFangirl03
Summary: Sam and Castiel take care of Gabriel after Ketch brings him to the Bunker and goes to the Apocalypse World with Dean.





	1. Would it Matter

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys, I'm back! So, I watched 13x17 and my heart broke. So, I turned to my outlet and started writing and this came out. For the purposes of this story, the portal to Apocalypse Word stays open indefinitely. It just fades in and out of existence from time to time, but still reappearing in the same place it opened until someone closes it. Titles are from Skillet's Never Surrender and Would it matter. Hope you like it.

Gabriel didn’t know how long it had been. Years, probably. How many, he wasn’t sure. Perhaps that was for the best. Since the Angels Fell and Metatron captured him, he’d stopped keeping track. It’s not like it mattered anyway. None of it mattered.

Castiel hadn’t gotten the message he’d tried to give when he had the chance, and after Metatron sold him to Hell, Crowley hadn’t let him out. Although, his living conditions had improved a little. The demon even visited him occasionally.

Then Asmodeus came around. Gabriel didn’t know what happened to Crowley, and he didn’t particularly care either. All he knew was that Crowley was gone and Asmodeus took his place. Gabriel’s conditions were not improved.

The Prince had been ecstatic to find out that he had an Archangel in his possession. He certainly loved to see how much torture Gabriel could endure before breaking. Especially after he’d had the incredible idea to sew his lips shut when he grew tired of all the things Gabriel said.

_“Let’s pay homage to your alias, Loki. Though I like to think I wouldn’t have been fooled by your tricky words.”_

Gabriel shudders. He didn’t know what he was going to do. Nothing, probably. Wasn’t like he could use any of his Grace. Besides, no one knew where he was anyway. Not that anyone would care.

He looks up, grasping the bars of his cage when he sees Ketch leaning against a pillar, groaning as he pulls a tooth out. The human glances up at him. “What are you looking at?” he asks, obviously annoyed. “If I had half your power, I’d . . .” he trails off, looking at Gabriel considerably. Ketch glances around. “In fact,” he starts, crawling towards his cage.

Gabriel scrambles back, pressing himself into the furthest corner. _No, no, no_ , he thinks. _Not any more, not any more_.

“I believe it’s time to go,” Ketch says, lifting the gate. “Consider this a rescue.”

 _No, no rescue. Not now. Asmodeus would kill me. If he catches me . . ._ Gabriel watches with wide eyes as Ketch walks away. He reappears a few seconds later, the Archangel Blade in hand. Gabriel’s eyes widen and he tries to protest against the stitches, his mouth aching.

“Come on, you,” Ketch says, crouching close to him as Gabriel cowers against the walls of the cage. “Come on!” he exclaims impatiently, grabbing Gabriel’s leg and dragging the uncooperative Archangel out, taking his shoulder and roughly helping him up and out the door.

“This would all go so much faster if you just flapped your bloody wings,” Ketch mutters, dragging Gabriel along the hallway.

Gabriel makes an indignant noise. He couldn’t fly, even if he wanted to.

“What the Hell?” one of the demons says as they round a corner, running right into it.

Ketch lets go of Gabriel and grasps the Archangel Blade in his hand, stabbing it in the stomach.

Gabriel watches with wide eyes as the corpse collapses and Ketch turns back to him, grabbing his shoulder again as he flinches away. “Where were we?”

Gabriel tries to fight against him, his protestations muffled by the stitches pulling against his lips.

They make it out quickly and Ketch takes him to a car parked in front of the sanitorium. “Get in,” Ketch says, opening the passenger door and roughly shoving him in.

Gabriel whimpers and flinches away when Ketch closes the door and climbs in the driver’s side. He presses himself against the door and curls in on himself, trying not to think about what would happen when Asmodeus found out he was gone.

-

When they arrive at their destination, Ketch gets out of the car and walks over to Gabriel’s side. He flinches away when Ketch opens the door and drags him out, taking him down a flight of stairs and opening the door in front of them. He takes Gabriel down two more flights of stairs and into a large room that had a table with a map of the world on it.

It looks vaguely familiar, but he couldn’t tell from where. Ketch walks him up a step, into a library looking room and off to the side, in the dark and out of sight of the main room. Gabriel cowers away from Ketch and looks around with wide eyes.

About thirty minutes of tense silence passes before the sound of the door opening echoes through the room and Gabriel hears muted voices. He only catches a few words: spell, blood, Grace, Archangel. None of them sounded good.

When there was a lull in the conversation, Ketch steps out, holding his hands up. There are exclamations from the voices in the main room and the sound of guns cocking.

“Wait,” Ketch says. “I come in peace.”

“Yeah, right,” a semi-familiar voice says.

“And, I brought you a gift,” he says, reaching over towards Gabriel and pulling him out of the dark corner. Gabriel looks on in confusion as he realizes who was in the main room. The Winchesters. But they looked different than he remembered. How long had it been?

A look of confusion crosses their faces before they recognize him.

“Wait a second,” Sam says, lowering his gun. “Is that . . .”

Ketch pulls Gabriel with him down the mini-staircase and roughly puts him in a chair.

“That Gabriel?” Dean asks.

Gabriel glances around the room, trying to figure out where he’d seen it before.

“No, no, that’s impossible,” Sam says. “He . . . he’s dead. We . . . we saw him die.”

Gabriel looks at him, feeling confused. Sam hadn't been there. Neither had Dean.

“Or did you?” Ketch asks.

“What did you do to him?” Dean asks, lowering his gun.

“Not me, Asmodeus. The Prince was holding him prisoner until I liberated the poor man. And I understand you may need an Archangel for a spell, perhaps.”

Gabriel looks down, wishing the ground would swallow him.

“Well, what luck,” Ketch continues.

“We need his Grace,” Sam says.

When he hears this, Gabriel starts shouting against his stitches and tries to get away, a panicked look in his eyes.

“Calm down. Calm down,” Ketch says, grasping his arm and keeping him in the chair. “Nervy,” he mutters. He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a vial of Grace he’d taken, carefully setting it on the map-table. “Here. Take that. And, uh . . .” He reaches into his coat and pulls out the Archangel Blade and sets it down next to the Grace. “The Archangel Blade.”

“Why would you . . .” Sam starts. He pauses and a grim understanding comes over his face. “What’s the catch? What do you want?”

“Protection. From Asmodeus.”

“The one you’re working for?” Dean asks.

“ _Was_ working for,” Ketch corrects. “But when he finds out that I stole his prize milk cow, well, I imagine that he’ll hunt me to the ends of the Earth. This is the only safe place I know.”

Sam scoffs. “What? Do you think you’re just gonna move in?”

Ketch gives a miniscule shrug. “Dibs on the top bunk?”

“No,” Sam says, shaking his head.

“Deal,” Dean says at the same time.

“What?” Sam asks, looking at his brother in surprise.

“I don’t know what the Hell’s goin’ on here,” Dean says, uncocking his gun. “But if this helps us get mom back, helps us get Jack back, then . . . sure.” He tosses his gun on the bag on the table. “Whatever you want.”

There’s a long silence. Sam disarms his gun and puts it next to Deans and shakes his head. “So, are we just going to stand here?”

“No,” Ketch says. “If you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go to my room.” He nods at them before walking to the hallway.

Sam scoffs. “Great, he’s already picked out a room.”

Dean shrugs. “Like I said, if this helps, then so be it.” He glances over at Gabriel, an indiscernible look in his eyes. “You do something with him, I’m gonna get started on the spell,” he says, walking forward and grabbing the Grace and Archangel Blade.

Gabriel flinches away and glances over at Sam, a frightened look in his eyes. Sam takes a deep breath and carefully walks closer, still staying a few feet away. “Hey, Gabriel,” he says carefully. “I’m gonna go get some stuff from the med-bay, are you okay here?”

The Archangel doesn’t face him, but Sam could see his eyes glancing around, making sure he knew where everything was. Sam knew that feeling. With a sad sigh, he deliberately walks in a wide arch around Gabriel and towards the med-bay they’d found a few months ago in an undiscovered part of the Bunker.

He quickly glances around the room and tries to decide what he needed. A scalpel and tweezers for the stitches he noticed in Gabriel’s lips, some butterfly bandages for the cuts, and a washcloth to clean the grime and blood off him. With a decisive nod, he grabs all the items and gets a bowl of warm water from the sink before walking back out to the main room where Gabriel was, turning the lights on in the library and setting the materials on a table.

The Archangel had turned the chair so he was facing the direction Sam had disappeared. He glances up before looking away, keeping his head down.

“Gabriel,” Sam says, walking up to him, “do you think we could move this to the library? Well, can you move?”

There’s nothing before a tiny nod he almost misses.

“Good. Do you need any help getting up?”

Gabriel shakes his head and carefully places a hand on the map table, gingerly getting himself into a standing position. He starts walking after Sam, but stumbles and almost hits his head on the steps before Sam catches him. Gabriel flinches away and cowers in his grip.

“Hey, Gabriel. It’s okay, I’m not gonna hurt you,” he says soothingly as he helps the Archangel into the library and to the closest chair. “There we go,” he says. “I’m gonna take those stitches out now, is that alright?”

Sam sees a look of fear in Gabriel’s eyes, but he still tentatively nods.

“You don’t need to be afraid,” Sam says, gingerly picks up the scalpel, holding it hilt first and showing it to Gabriel. “I’m just gonna get the stitches out, okay. Nothing more.” Gabriel still doesn’t look at him, but nods minutely.

Taking this as the best sign he was going to get, Sam takes the tweezers and uses them to hold each stitch out so it was easier to cut them. He tries to ignore Gabriel’s muffled grunts of pain, flinching as he did, until he cuts the last stitch. “Gabriel . . . man, what happened to you?” he asks, not really expecting an answer. He puts the tweezer and scalpel down as Dean walks in.

“Alright, let’s do this,” Dean says, bronze bowl in hand as he strides up to the other table.

“Well, shouldn’t we wait?” Sam asks, twisting in his seat.

“Wait?” Dean asks, turning to face him. “Why?”

Sam gestures at Gabriel as his brother continues talking.

“We got everything we need. Everything else is just burnin’ daylight. Come on. Let’s open this door.” He turns around and starts preparing the spell.

Sam lets out a sigh and glances at Gabriel. “Alright,” he says, getting out of his seat. “I’ll gather my gear.”

“Uh . . . hold on,” Dean says, facing him. “I’m headin’ in alone.”

“What?”

“Look, we got a busted-up Archangel here,” Dean says, gesturing to Gabriel. “And who the Hell knows what else, okay? Somebody’s gotta stay here just in case.”

“And I’m coming with you,” Ketch says, walking up to them. “As I said, Asmodeus will be hunting me to the ends of the Earth, so it’s better if I’m not on _this_ Earth.”

“It’s not that much better over there,” Sam says. “You know it’s a war zone, right?”

“Won’t be my first, shan’t be my last. Hm?”

“Fine,” Dean says.

“Fine?” Sam asks, looking at his brother in surprise. “So you want Ketch to go and not me?”

“I don’t care if he dies. Hell, I’m kinda rootin’ for it.” He glances over and the corners of Ketch’s mouth turn up.

“Still, you can’t—”

“No, I have to. It takes something that’s been over there before to open up the right door, so that’s either you or me. So I’m gonna go. And if something happens to me, then I need you to come and save me and save mom and save whoever else, okay?”

“It’s safer if we go together.”

“Oh, there’s no such thing as safer over there, you know that. I know you don’t like this, okay? I don’t expect you to. This is the way it’s gonna be.”

Sam stays silent for a few seconds. “Fine,” he says, walking over to the ingredients and starting the spell.

Dean takes out one of his hairs and puts it in the bowl. “Something that’s been there, right?”

Sam finishes mixing the ingredients. “Alright. Remember, it might not be open when you need it. Just wait and stay safe.” He holds the stone over the bowl and starts chanting, “ _Koth Munto Notox_.”

A purple light shoots out and opens a rift a few feet away. Dean glances at his watch then looks at Sam. He places a hand on his brother’s shoulder for a few seconds before letting go. “Okay,” Dean says. He walks up to the rift and looks back at Sam. Sam glances down and Dean walks into the rift, Ketch following.

Sam stands there for about a minute before the rift fizzles and disappears. Fighting the panic he feels, he takes a deep breath and turns back to Gabriel. The Archangel hadn’t moved from his seat, still not looking at Sam as he glances around the room. “Okay then,” he says, starting over to Gabriel. Sam had a job to do, and right now that was taking care of the Archangel.

He sits in the seat across from him and picks up the tweezers. “Alright, let’s get those threads out,” he says, holding the tweezers up and carefully pulling the wires out. Gabriel flinches and lets out a muffled noise of pain. “I know it hurts, just stay with me.” He alternates between the top and bottom threads until they’re all out.

“There we go. Why don’t we get all that stuff off your face,” he says, picking up the washcloth and carefully cleaning the blood and grime. “Okay,” he says when he’s done. “Now we can get those cuts closed up.” Sam takes the butterfly bandages and starts putting them on the cuts on Gabriel’s face.

“Do you wanna change clothes, or something?” Sam asks when the wounds are closed. “I can probably find you something, but it might not fit.”

Gabriel shakes his head and pulls away.

“Alright then,” Sam says, smiling sadly. “Do you need me to help you get up, or are you good?”

Gabriel looks away and nods.

“Okay, I’m gonna pick you up so it’s easier. Is that okay?”

Gabriel nods again.

“Good,” Sam says, getting out of his seat and kneeling next to Gabriel. He puts an arm under Gabriel’s knees and the other against his back and picks him up bridal style, starting to walk to the hallway. “Which room do you want to stay in?” Sam asks when they’re at the entryway.

Gabriel shrugs.

Sam glances around and chooses the one next to his. This way, it would be easier for him to help Gabriel if he needed it. Sam lays him on the bed and gets a blanket for Gabriel. “Just, uh, give a shout if you need anything.”

Gabriel looks away and shakes his head.

“Oh, uh, right. Gimmie a sec,” Sam says, walking out of the room and into his. He should’ve guessed Gabriel wouldn’t want to speak, or perhaps not be able to. He searches through his desk and brings out one of the extra phones they had and walks back to Gabriel’s room. “Here you go,” Sam says, handing him the phone. “Just call me if you need anything.”

Gabriel nods.

“Okay. Uh, have fun, I guess,” Sam says, walking out of the room and into his. He lies on his bed and closes his eyes. Now that he had some time to collect his thoughts, he wasn’t sure what to think. Gabriel was back somehow and had obviously been through some serious shit. Sam wasn’t sure he was equipped to deal with this. He dealt with all his trauma by shoving it down and letting it fester. It was gonna come back to bite him one day, but he’d take it when it came.

Sam also didn’t know the first thing about helping other people with trauma. Dean did the same thing as him and neither of them ever talked about anything. He supposed he’d just have to figure it out.

Deciding thoughts like this were better left for morning, he closes his eyes and drifts off to sleep.

-

The next morning, Sam woke up when his alarm went off. He followed his typical routine, got dressed, went on a run, made breakfast, then settled in the library. It wasn’t until about eight thirty that he remembered the events of yesterday. Not that he could really forget, what with the rift that kept appearing and disappearing sporadically near him. He’d just somehow managed to let slip from his memory the not-so-dead Archangel in the room right next to his.

Rubbing a hand over his face, Sam gets out of his seat and walks to Gabriel’s room. He carefully knocks on the door, hoping Gabriel would let him in. There’s a vague noise that sounds something like a mix between an acknowledgment and the words, ‘come in’. Taking this as a yes, he opens the door and steps in, looking around in astonishment.

The walls were covered in Enochian writing. Sam lets out a noise of surprise as he glances around the room. He notices one of the cans of paint they kept sitting mostly empty next to the desk, a paintbrush sticking out of it. “That’s uh . . . nice,” he says, feeling dumbfounded.

Gabriel nods slightly from where he was on the bed.

Sam shakes his head and looks over to the Archangel. “Uh, I was just coming in to check on you. See if you’re doin’ okay.”

A look of consideration passes Gabriel’s face before he shrugs.

Sam nods. “Okay. Um, you want anything to eat, or . . . change your clothes or something.”

There’s a pause. After a few seconds Gabriel nods and does the sign for food. Then brushes both of his hands over his chest before making an ‘L’ with his left hand, placing the thumb on his right palm and moving his left hand like a lever.

Sam, trying to recall the sign language he knew, gathered Gabriel wanted food now, and clothes later. “Got it. Uh, what kinda food?”

Gabriel tilts his head and looks at him, confused. He glances down, a considerable look on his face. After a few seconds, he signs, ‘Surprise me.’

“Okay. I’ll be right back,” Sam says, walking out and to the kitchen. He didn’t know what would be best for Gabriel after whatever he’d been through. If he remembered anything from before, probably something sugary. However, he wasn’t sure that was appropriate. Deciding to go with one of the leftover burgers Dean had made a day or so ago, he heats the patty up in the microwave and puts it together with bread, cheese, lettuce, and tomato.

Getting it on a plate, Sam walks back to Gabriel’s room and goes in. The Archangel was sitting on his bed, looking blankly at an Enochian-covered wall.

“Uh, hey Gabe,” he says carefully.

Gabriel starts and looks at him, his eyes wide. He shakes his head and takes a deep breath.

“Sorry. Um, I got you some food,” Sam says, holding out the plate.

Gabriel gestures to the end of the bed.

Sam nods and places the plate where Gabriel pointed.

The Archangel looks at it for a few seconds before hesitantly reaching out and takes it. After Sam doesn’t try and stop him, Gabriel starts quickly eating the burger.

“Guess you were hungry, huh,” Sam says.

Gabriel doesn't acknowledge him and finishes the burger. He glances up at Sam. ‘Clothes, please,’ he signs carefully.

Sam nods. “Okay, I'll be right back,” he says, walking out of Gabriel's room and into his. He starts rifling through his dresser and pulls out a pair of sweatpants and an old Stanford shirt of his. Then, he goes to Dean's room and takes a pair of his underwear. It was closer to Gabriel's size.

Deciding he had everything, Sam walks back to Gabriel's room. “Hey, Gabe. I, uh, got you some clothes,” he says, placing them on the edge of the bed. “Do you want a shower or something to get you cleaned up, or need help with any with anything?”

Gabriel stares at him with something akin to shock for a few seconds. Then, he glances at the clothes and signs, ‘Shower. Chair. Help.’

Sam nods. “I’ll go get a chair. The shower room is a few doors down, you’ll know it when you see it,” he says, starting to walk out. He pauses. “Unless, uh, you still have trouble walking.”

Gabriel shakes his head.

“Okay, meet you there,” Sam says, walking out the room and to the kitchen to get one of the stools. After he had one, he got a towel and a washcloth from the laundry and starts walking to the shower room.

Gabriel was leaning against one of the walls, staring at the knobs that controlled the water. The clothes Sam brought him were lying on the floor nearby.

“Hey, Gabe,” Sam says carefully.

Gabriel blinks and glances over at him. He moves an open hand up and brings it to his temple before giving him a vertical salute.

The corner of Sam’s mouth quirks up. “Okay. I got a stool,” he says, holding it up. “We can use my shower since Dean doesn’t have any of the good stuff,” he says, putting the towel next to the clothes before walking over to the spot he used and gesturing at the products he had.

Gabriel narrows his eyes slightly and nods, gingerly walking over to where Sam was setting the stool down.

“Do you, uh . . . need any help getting undressed?” Sam asks tentatively.

Gabriel pauses before shaking his head.

Sam nods and faces away as Gabriel starts taking his clothes off. After a few seconds, there’s a tap on his arm. He turns around and sees Gabriel sitting on the stool, not looking at him and seemingly trying to make himself smaller, his dirty clothes out of the way.

“It’s okay,” Sam says soothingly as he starts fiddling with the shower knobs, trying to find the right temperature. Once he was sure he had it, he took his body wash and handed it to Gabriel along with the washcloth. “I can get your hair if you got everything else. Well, except your back.”

Gabriel nods, taking the stuff.

Sam rolls his sleeves up and gets the shampoo before starting to work it into Gabriel’s hair, trying to get it in around the knots. At least his conditioner should be able to help with that.

Gabriel lets out a noise that was a mix between a whimper and a groan.

Sam stops and asks, “You okay?”

Gabriel nods and signs, ‘Don’t stop.’

“Got it,” Sam says, continuing his ministrations while Gabriel starts washing his arms.

After he worked the shampoo all the way in and got the dirt and grime out, he helps Gabriel lean forward to wash it away. Then he grabs the conditioner and starts flattening the Archangel’s hair with it, carefully teasing the knots out.

It takes him a while, but eventually Sam gets them all and leaves the conditioner to set. He picks up the washcloth Gabriel had put down and cleans it off under the water, getting most of the blood and dirt off it. Then, he takes the body wash and puts it on the cloth before starting to wash Gabriel’s back.

He had to be careful because of the wounds that crisscrossed his skin. Sam was pretty sure they were from a whip or something like that, and underneath them he saw old scars. It made him angrier at Asmodeus, because he knew what it was like. Torture was never fun.

After he finished, Sam cleaned the washcloth and let Gabriel get up so he could get the soap and conditioner off himself. Sam gets the towel and clothes from where they were a few feet away and hands the former to Gabriel and sets the latter on a dry spot on the floor. “You need any help getting dressed?”

Gabriel takes the towel and shakes his head.

“Got it. I’ll be in the library if you need anything,” he says, turning to walk away.

Gabriel stops him and signs, ‘Thank you.’

Sam smiles softly. “You’re welcome. See ya later,” he says, walking away and waving good-bye.

-

It was only after Sam had worked his way through a few books that he thought of calling Castiel. Feeling like an idiot, he dials up his friend.

**‘Hello, Sam?’**

“Hey, Cas. How’s it goin’?”

**‘I’ve had no luck finding the Seal of Solomon, but I have high hopes.’**

“It’s okay Cas, we already got it.”

**‘Good. Now we just need to get some Archangel Grace. I’ve been trying to locate—’**

“No, we already got it.”

There’s a pause. **‘How?’**

“Gabriel.”

There’s another, longer pause. Then Castiel draws in a breath. **‘And you didn’t think to tell me this until now?’** It was obvious he was restraining himself.

“Yeah, sorry.”

He sighs. **‘It is alright. I suppose this means that we have everything we need?’**

“Uh-huh. Actually, Dean’s over there right now.”

**‘What?! Why are you not with him?’**

“He didn’t want me there.”

There are a few muttered words that Sam doesn’t catch before the Angel inhales and exhales in a calm manner. **‘I’m coming over. Make sure Gabriel is aware, I wish to speak with him.’**

Sam draws in a sharp breath. “Uh, that might be difficult.”

**‘Why?’**

“Do you know ASL?”

**‘Of course, what does that have to do with anything?’**

“He’s not talking, Asmodeus stitched his mouth together. I got them out, but I think he’s still tentative about it.”

There’s a muffled curse. **‘I still want to talk with him, but I won’t if he doesn't want to. I should be there in a few hours.’**

“Got it. See ya soon.”

**‘Likewise.’**

The call cuts out and Sam puts his phone on the table. He probably should’ve done that sooner.

Gabriel walks out from the hallway, looking even smaller in the too-large shirt and sweatpants with the legs rolled up.

“Hey, you doin’ okay?”

‘Yeah.’ He gestures to the phone.

“Uh, Cas. He’s on his way.”

A look of what was either fear or relief flashes in Gabriel’s eyes. He nods.

“You wanna read? I’m sure there’s something here you’d like.”

Gabriel pauses considerably for a few seconds before he starts looking through the shelves. Eventually, he picks out one of the books and sits across from Sam.

-

A few hours later, the two of them look over to the Map Room when they hear the Bunker door open and see Castiel walking down the steps.

“Hey, Cas,” Sam says as the Angel walks up to them.

Castiel acknowledges him and freezes when he sees Gabriel, who had stopped reading and was averting his eyes. He walks forward, carefully reaching a hand out to his brother’s mangled wings and the Archangel flinches away, all six of them folding in tightly against his back. Castiel draws his hand back and a look of anger crosses his face. He turns to Sam. “You said Asmodeus did this to him?”

Gabriel flinches and Sam nods. “Yeah.”

Castiel shakes his head and looks at his brother sadly. “I never liked him. He was always too cruel for his own good.” He deliberately steps around Gabriel and sits next to him.

Gabriel keeps his eyes down.

“Brother,” Castiel says. “Do you know who I am?”

Gabriel nods.

“I am not going to hurt you.”

Gabriel nods again and glances at him.

“Would it be alright if we were to speak telepathically?”

There’s a long pause. Gabriel shakes his head.

“Okay.” Castiel glances at Sam and lets out a sigh. Then he looks back at Gabriel and asks, _“Is this better?”_ speaking in Enochian instead of English.

Gabriel blinks in surprise and glances at his brother. He opens his mouth to say something, but stops, looking at Sam. After a few moments of indecision, he says, _“Yes.”_ his voice rough because of misuse.

Sam grins and gets back to his book as Castiel asks, _“Are you doing alright?”_

Gabriel shrugs. _“I’ve been better. Your wings don’t look to good.”_

_“Neither do yours, brother.”_

_“The demon stole my feathers and I didn’t get the chance to molt properly.”_

Castiel grimaces. _“You will in a few months. I can help you.”_

Gabriel pauses. _“Yeah,”_ he says quietly. _“Maybe sometime. What about you? It can’t have been easy doing it on your own.”_

Castiel shrugs and glances at Sam, who was half paying attention to them. _“Sam usually helps me, but I’m sure he would be fine if you wanted to join us.”_

Gabriel’s eyes widen. _“You let him help you?”_

Castiel nods. _“He noticed my odd behavior one time a few years ago and asked me what was going on, so I told him. I also asked if he’d like to help me because it can be difficult sometimes. He seemed surprised, but ended up saying yes.”_

Gabriel makes a vaguely surprised noise. _“And here I thought you’d be forever alone, little bro. When’s the wedding?”_

Castiel tits his head and gives Gabriel a look of confusion. _“Sam and I are not romantically involved.”_

Gabriel blinks in surprise. _“Oh. I thought . . .”_

Castiel shakes his head. _“No. Although, I do understand why you would think that.”_

Gabriel hums, nodding. _“Anyway, how long’s it been since I kicked it? I stopped keeping track after a while.”_

_“About eight years.”_

Gabriel’s eyes widen. _“Yipes.”_

Castiel nods. _“How long have you been back?”_

_“Since Sam took a swan dive into Lucifer’s Cage. Dad brought me back.”_

_“Same with me.”_

_“He the one who raised your rank? I noticed it last time I saw you.”_

Castiel’s eyes widen. _“Uh, yes. That was really you?”_

_“Yeah. I tried to tell you what was going on, but I guess you didn’t get it.”_

Castiel looks down, sadness in his eyes. _“I apologize. I assumed you were an illusion that Metatron created.”_

Gabriel shrugs. _“It’s okay, you didn’t know. Did I miss anything important while I was imprisoned by Heaven and Hell? ‘Cause Dean went through a portal to an alternate dimension and I’ve been meaning to ask about it.”_

A thoughtful look crosses Castiel’s face and he nods. _“Quite a lot. I’ll fill in the details later, but right now he’s looking for Mary Winchester and Jack, Lucifer’s son.”_

Gabriel nods before he stops and shock etches itself onto his face. _“Did you just say . . .”_

_“Mary Winchester and Lucifer’s son.”_

There’s a long pause, Gabriel staring at him with wide eyes. _“I want to ask how, because Mary’s supposed to be dead, and Luci isn’t supposed to have a son. But at the same time, I’m afraid of the answer I’m gonna get.”_

Castiel shrugs. _“Short version is, Amara came back and brought Mary back after she and our Father made up and left. As for Jack, Lucifer wanted someone to help him take over the world.”_

The look of shock remains. _“Auntie Amara was back? Dad too?”_

_“Yes.”_

_“And they made up?”_

_“Yes.”_

_“And Lucifer’s back and trying to destroy the world again?”_

_“Yes.”_

Gabriel lets out a sigh and shakes his head. _“I knew I’d regret asking. So, Mary and . . ._ Jack _are in some alternate dimension and Dean and Ketch went to rescue them?”_

Castiel nods before he realizes what Gabriel just said. He turns to Sam. “Sam,” he says quietly.

“Uh, yeah, Cas?” Sam asks, glancing up from his book.

“Is Dean with Ketch? In the Apocalypse World?”

Sam pauses. “No . . .” he trails off unconvincingly.

Castiel closes his eyes and sighs. “And this information wasn’t relevant because _why_?”

Sam looks away. “I, uh . . . didn’t think it mattered that much.”

Castiel nods. “Didn’t think it mattered? You didn’t think I should be aware that Dean was in a broken world with one of our enemies?”

“No, it’s not like that. He’s the one who rescued Gabriel.”

Castiel pauses, an indecipherable look on his face. He nods. “I will accept this development, but only grudgingly. And I’m going to berate Dean severely when he gets back.”

 _“Get mad at Ketch too, he’s not nice,”_ Gabriel mutters.

Castiel raises an eyebrow. “Get some sleep, Gabriel. You look exhausted.”

Gabriel lets out an indignant noise.

Castiel glares at him.

Gabriel looks down. _“Fine. But only if you lie down with me when you’re done out here.”_

“I promise.”

Gabriel nods and gets up, walking towards the hallway. Before he gets away, Castiel reaches out and stops him. Gabriel flinches away.

“Brother, let me heal you,” Castiel says.

Gabriel looks down. _“No thank you, I’ll be fine,”_ he says before walking away.

Castiel sighs.

Sam chuckles. “That’s the best I’ve seen him all day. What did you guys talk about?”

“Nothing important. How was he acting before?”

“Skittish. Wouldn’t look me in the eyes.”

Castiel nods. “That’s not good.”

“He seemed fine when you were talking with him.”

“Yeah. It’s always nice to be around another Angel that doesn’t want you dead.”

Sam gives him a sympathetic look. “I bet. You think he’ll still be fine tomorrow?”

Castiel shrugs. “We can only wait and see.” He gets out of his seat and says, “I promised Gabriel I would stay with him tonight. If we need your help, I’ll let you know.”

“Got it, Sam says as the Angel starts walking to Gabriel’s room. He looks back to his book and starts reading.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comment, please! They're the stuff that keeps writers happy and healthy. (Plus it's also incentive to write more chapters. *Wink wink, nudge nudge*)


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapter, yay! In all seriousness guys, thank you so much for all the feedback I got, it really made my day. Enjoy this little bit of mostly fluff. I'll post a new chapter soon as I can, promise.
> 
> Italics = Enochian
> 
> Underlined = ASL (American Sign Language)

It was around two thirty when the nightmares came.

Gabriel woke up first, whimpering and writhing on the bed, still trying to escape Asmodeus’ cruel hands. He lied there, trying to calm his racing heart and heavy breathing.

A few minutes later, he feels Castiel shifting in the bed, whimpering and saying things under his breath. Gabriel couldn’t catch most of it, but he heard snippets.

_“I’m sorry . . . didn’t mean it . . . thought I was doing good.”_

Deciding he didn’t want to leave his brother to the nightmares, Gabriel starts shaking Castiel awake.

The Seraph’s eyes shoot open and he looks around the room in shock. When he realizes where he was and who’d woken him, he relaxes, taking a deep breath. “H-hey, Gabriel. Sorry if I woke you.”

‘It’s alright. They woke me up too.’

Castiel nods. _“Are you doing okay?”_

Gabriel shrugs. ‘I would like peaceful sleep, but it’s better than . . . you know.’

_“I bet. Do you want to talk about it?”_

Gabriel shakes his head. ‘Maybe sometime. Just . . . not yet.’

_“Understood. C’mere,”_ Castiel says, moving his arm up and gesturing for Gabriel to come closer.

He eyes Castiel warily before tentatively moving over and leaning against his chest.

_“You’re safe now, brother,”_ Castiel murmurs.

It wasn’t even ten minutes later that they heard a loud shout from Sam’s room. Castiel quickly gets up and runs over, while Gabriel follows more slowly.

“Sam,” Castiel says, standing in his doorway, “are you alright?”

Wide, frightened eyes stare at him for a few seconds before recognition flashes through them and Sam looks away. “Yeah,” he says quietly. “Sorry I woke you up.”

“It’s alright. We were woken up by nightmares of our own, so there’s no need to apologize.”

“Oh. Are you two doing okay?”

“As well as we’ll ever be. You?”

Sam shrugs. “I’m used to it.”

Gabriel peeks out from behind Castiel and signs, ‘Can we join you?’

Sam chuckles. “Sure,” he says, moving over to the edge of his bed and sitting up against the headboard. “I don’t know if we’ll all fit though.”

Paying no heed to Sam’s words, the Angels both walk over and get in, Castiel sitting next to Sam with Gabriel on his lap.

“You two comfortable?”

They nod.

“Good. Wanna watch something?” he asks, gesturing to the T.V.

Castiel pauses considerably before nodding. “If Gabriel is okay with it.”

Gabriel nods.

“Got it,” Sam says, getting the remote and turning the T.V. on. “Any suggestions?”

Gabriel reaches for the remote and Sam hands it over. He goes to the search bar and pauses, mulling over his options. After a few seconds, he nods and starts typing.

“ ‘Three Blind Saints’?” Castiel says. “I’ve not heard of that one.”

‘It’s not very well known,’ Gabriel signs as he finds it and starts the movie.

It opens, playing a song neither Sam or Castiel recognize as the camera starts following a pair of cowboy boots walking out of a barber shop.

Sam glances over at Gabriel and notices an almost mischievous glint in his eyes, reminiscent of the Trickster. He wasn’t sure if this was a good or a bad thing.

They follow two more pairs of shoes as they walk down the street before getting picked up in a red car. It was an older model, and Sam was sure Dean would’ve been able to tell what it was had he been there.

It cuts to a shot of the car driving down a road, a familiar voice speaking.

Castiel and Sam glance at Gabriel out of the corners of their eyes.

Then, there’s a close-up shot of the car and who was driving. Unmistakably, Gabriel.

Their eyes widen and they stare at Gabriel, who had a light smirk on his face.

“Uh . . .” Sam says, glancing between the T.V. and Gabriel.

‘I’ll explain later,’ Gabriel signs. ‘Pay attention.’

Sam and Castiel nod and look back to the T.V., questions flashing through their mind.

They increased exponentially near the end of the movie when God showed up and Gabriel dressed in drag.

-

That morning, Castiel tried to make everyone breakfast. Key word there—tried.

It started out okay, nothing on fire or exploding. Then, Castiel let the pancakes cook too long on the skillet and they turned out burned on one side. He ended up paying so much attention to them that he didn’t notice the bacon shriveling up to little black husks. The french toast didn’t turn out much better.

By the time Sam got to the kitchen for damage control, drawn by the smell of burning food, the only remotely edible thing was the eggs. Sadly, they were cold, since Castiel had made them first, and had no seasoning.

Thankfully, neither Sam or Gabriel seemed to mind, although Castiel still apologized profusely.

“Cas, it’s alright,” Sam says, for what must’ve been the fifth time. “I don’t mind, and Gabe doesn’t either.” He gestures to the Archangel, who was practically shoveling the food into his mouth.

Castiel sighs. “I am aware. It seems making food with a stove is more complicated than I anticipated.”

Sam chuckles. “Yeah. Next time, let me help.”

Castiel nods. “I will. You were asleep when I started, so I didn’t think to wake you. Hopefully, you will prove a better teacher than your brother.”

Sam grins. “I sure hope so. You gonna eat with us?”

Castiel shakes his head. “I would prefer not. I still do not taste the, uh, ‘sum of its parts’ as you put it. Just molecules.”

“Got it. You stickin’ around?”

Castiel glances at Gabriel and nods. “I would like to stay here and take care of my brother. Plus, we must wait for Dean to get back.”

“Yeah. Well, we don’t have much goin’ on right now. I guess the world decided to stop tryin’ to destroy itself,” Sam says with a grin.

Castiel chuckles and the corner of his mouth turns up. “Yes, I suppose that’s true. I think I will check out the artifact rooms and make sure they’re in order.”

“Do you want any help?”

“No, I should be fine.” He glances at Gabriel, who was watching them. _“Feel better, brother. If you want me to heal you, just says so.”_

Gabriel looks away and nods.

Sighing sadly, Castiel walks out of the kitchen.

Sam picks up his and Gabriel’s empty plates and takes them to the sink. “You wanna do anything today?” he asks, turning to face Gabriel.

A look of consideration passes Gabriel’s face before he nods. ‘Yes. Outside.’

“You wanna go outside?”

Gabriel nods.

“Okay, we can do that,” Sam says, starting to clean the plates. “Just let me finish with the dishes.” He gestures to the mess Castiel had made.

Gabriel nods and walks out of the kitchen.

-

As Sam was cleaning the dishes, he considered getting Cas to help him with them, seeing as they were his mess. But, he decided the Angel had enough to deal with. Plus, he was almost done, so it didn’t really matter.

After he finished, Sam went to his room and got a pair of boots so he could take Gabriel outside. Then, he got a pair from Dean’s room that Gabriel could wear. They might be a bit big, but would fit better than his shoes.

He walks over to Gabriel’s room, where the Archangel was lying on his bed and reading.

He glances up when Sam walks in and puts the book down. ‘You done?’

“Yeah. I got you some boots so you don’t have to walk around barefoot,” Sam says, holding out the shoes.

Gabriel shakes his head. ‘Want to feel the grass.’

Sam nods. “Okay. You gonna need help getting up all the stairs?”

Gabriel pauses before nodding. ‘Probably.’

“Got it,” Sam says moving closer. “So, uh, do you want me to pick you up now or later?”

The corner of Gabriel’s mouth twitches. ‘Don’t give me the wrong idea, Sammy.’

Sam chuckles. ‘You know what I mean.’

‘True, true. You can pick me up now.’

Sam nods and stands next to the bed, reaching his arms out to lift Gabriel up bridal style.

The Archangel relaxes in his arms as Sam takes him out and to the main room, passing Castiel as he does.

“Hello Gabriel, Sam,” he says, the corners of his mouth turning up as he takes in their position.

‘Hey, Cassy,’ Gabriel signs.

“What are you two doing?” he asks, looking mildly confused.

“He wants to go outside and needs help up the stairs,” Sam replies.

Castiel turns the confused look on Gabriel and raises an eyebrow.

Gabriel winks and nestles himself against Sam’s chest.

Castiel lets out a sigh. _“Be careful, brother,”_ he says warningly.

Gabriel rolls his eyes. _“Yes, mom.”_

_“Why do I even bother,”_ Castiel mutters, walking away.

Sam, feeling confused by the exchange, starts walking up the stairs.

After making it up the last flight, Gabriel gets out of Sam’s hold and walks forward a few steps, looking around. It had been _much_ too long.

There was a light breeze blowing through the trees, making the higher branches sway slightly. Gabriel tucks a strand of hair behind his ear and Sam notices just how long it was compared to before.

“Guess you didn’t get out much,” Sam says carefully.

Gabriel glances down and nods.

“Sorry.”

‘It’s alright. You didn’t know.’

Sam scoffs. “I should’ve guessed. Done more.”

Gabriel shakes his head. ‘You thought I was dead.’

Sam glances away. “Yeah,” he says quietly.

Gabriel gives him a sympathetic look and turns around, looking up at the sun and feeling the warmth on his skin. For the first time in a long, long time . . . he felt at peace.

Feeling the breeze brush up against his feathers, Gabriel stretches his mangled wings, extending them as far as he could. It felt nice, after all this time, to stretch them out instead of folding them in.

It made his wish he could still fly.

-

They stayed out there until the sun set. Gabriel insisted they watch it, so Sam found a spot and they sat down, staring out at the horizon.

It was silent, neither of them speaking as the clouds change from bright yellows, oranges, and reds to deeper blues and purples. Gabriel moves over and lays his head on Sam’s shoulder.

After the colors disappeared and the sky painted itself black, they hear the door open and turn around, seeing Castiel walking up the stairs.

“I was just coming to check on you,” he says, going over to them and sitting next to Gabriel. “It’s been a few hours.”

“Yeah,” Sam says. “Sorry, I should’ve texted you or something.”

“It’s alright,” Castiel says as Gabriel moves off Sam and leans against him, placing his head on his brother’s shoulder. “I understand. Nature is fascinating.”

Sam nods. “Gabriel wanted to watch the sunset.”

The Archangel gives him a betrayed look and Castiel chuckles. “It is quite beautiful. But my favorite are the stars.” He looks up, taking in the mostly empty sky. “Pity they won’t show for a while.”

“Yeah. It’s always fun to look for the constellations.”

Castiel smiles sadly. “Yes, I suppose it is.” He looks down at Gabriel. “We used to visit the Earth, you know. Before our Father created the humans, Gabriel would take us on what I think you call ‘field trips’ and showed us around.” He looks back up. “There were many more stars then. You could see for miles, even if the moon wasn’t full.”

Sam nods, not entirely sure what to say. “Sounds nice.”

“It was.”

A comfortable silence settles over them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, thoughts? I'd love to know what you think. BTW, the movie mentioned in the beginning is real. It's a cheesy, B-movie starring Richard Speight Jr. and I personally think it's hilarious. I won't necessarily recommend it, but if you happen to like cheesy, B-movies then you might wanna check it out.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess who's back (back), back again ('gain). Sorry it's been a while (and by a while I mean, like, six days). Since the most recent episode has been released, it seems my whole 'Chuck resurrected Gabriel after the Apocalypse and Metatron captured Gabriel after the Angel's Fell before selling him to Hell because he became too unruly' head cannon thing has been disproved. But, do not lose heart. I'm still gonna go with that for this story because it's easier than waiting for next week to see about the whole demigod thing, and because I really just don't wanna let go of it.
> 
> I apologize for the bit of indulgence on my part regarding three books about Angels that exist only in my head cannon.
> 
> I also apologize for another indulgence in my head cannon that Angels keep their wings in a side dimension (think of the layers of the Earth, I can't explain it better than that), which is why we (humans) can't see them.
> 
> Anyways, enjoy this little bit of . . . uh, whatever. Fluff, I guess? Who knows, enjoy!
> 
> Italics = Enochian
> 
> Underlined = ASL (American Sign Language)

Gabriel didn’t get much time alone. Nowadays, he usually had either Sam or Castiel staying with him. He didn’t mind—quite the opposite in fact, but it was nice to occasionally have peace and quiet, no one to interrupt his thoughts.

Gabriel takes a deep breath and glances at his wings. They were patchy and ragged, nothing like they once were. Most of the feathers were bent or overlapping the wrong way, no thanks to Asmodeus.

Gabriel shudders. Thoughts like that were best left behind. He was safe. Sam and Castiel wouldn’t let anything happen to him.

He reaches out a hand and tries straightening some of the feathers, his hands clumsy since it had been so long. Most of them sprung back, but some of them stayed, the shaft still crimped in where the bend had been. Gabriel lets out a sigh and glances at his other wings. This was going to take a _long_ time.

He just wished his room was large enough that he didn’t need to worry about half his wings going through the Enochian covered walls when they were stretched out all the way.

Reaching out for a new clump of feathers, he hears the Bunker door open and muffled conversation as two pairs of feet walk down the stairs.

Gabriel looks up when there’s a knock on his door.

“Gabriel, can I come in?” he hears Castiel ask.

_“Yes.”_

The door opens and Castiel steps inside, gasping when he saw Gabriel’s wings.

The Archangel’s eyes widen and he quickly draws them in, folding them against his back.

_“Brother, it’s alright,”_ Castiel says quickly, stepping forward.

Gabriel flinches away and Castiel stops.

_“I apologize, Gabriel. I did not mean to make you uncomfortable,”_ Castiel says, retreating a few steps.

‘It’s okay,’ he signs, moving to sit against the headboard, drawing his knees up to his chest and gesturing to the end of the bed.

Castiel nods and sits where Gabriel pointed. _“When you’re feeling up to it, I would like to help you. They can’t be comfortable.”_

Gabriel shakes his head. ‘They’re not.’

_“Whenever you are ready, brother.”_

Gabriel nods. ‘You and Sam find what you were searching for?’

_“Yes. The market in Lebanon provided us with what we needed. Sam also got you some candy, if you want it.”_

The corner of Gabriel’s mouth twitches. ‘Tell him I say thanks. I’ll be out in a little bit.’

Castiel nods and gets off the bed, leaving the room.

Gabriel lets out a sigh and carefully stretches his wings out about halfway, the ends just reaching the walls of his room. Maybe he should let Castiel help him. It would certainly make things infinitely easier.

Deciding he could ask later, Gabriel folds them back in and gets off the bed, walking out to the kitchen. When he reaches the doorway, he hears Sam and Castiel talking.

“. . . worried about him, Cas.”

“I know, we just have to wait.”

“What if he’s not back soon? It’s been a week. What if he’s . . .”

“Dean is fine, Sam. If there’s one thing I know about your brother, it’s that he can take care of himself. For the most part.”

Sam chuckles. “Yeah. Thanks Cas. How’s Gabriel doing?”

“Fine, as far as I can tell. He was trying to fix his feathers.”

“How are they?”

“Worse than mine. They’re battered and he’s missing a lot of them, no thanks to Asmodeus, and probably pretty weak.”

“Will they be okay?”

“Most likely. If he goes through a proper molt cycle this year.”

“Good. How’ve you been, Cas?”

There’s an almost stunned silence. “Um, f-fine. What about you, Sam?”

“Same. Do you know if Gabriel’s gonna come out, or is he staying in today?”

Taking this as his cue, Gabriel walks into the kitchen.

Sam notices him and smiles. “Oh, hey Gabe.” He turns to the groceries behind him and takes out a brightly colored bag. “I, uh, got you some candy. I dunno if you still like it, but uh . . .” He trails off, holding out the bag.

Gabriel’s face lights up and he takes the bag. ‘Thank you.’

“You’re welcome. You feel like doing anything today, or do you just wanna stay here?”

Gabriel pauses considerably. ‘Stay.’ He glances at Castiel. _“If . . . if you wanna help, you can. Later today, maybe sometime after lunch.”_

Castiel nods. _“Thank you, brother.”_

_“I should be the one thanking you, Cassy.”_

Sam gives them an odd look. “Me ‘nd Cas were just about to start on breakfast, you want anything in particular?”

Gabriel shakes his head and holds up the bag of candy. ‘I’ll be fine.’

“Good,” he says, turning to the groceries and talking with Cas about food.

Gabriel walks out of the room and into the library, searching the shelves for a very specific book. _The Complete Guide to Angels, Grace, and Other Related Subjects_. It was tucked in with its two continuations that talked about Angel behavior and wings. He briefly considered looking for something else, but decided he wanted to know what they’d written. After all, it had been Gabriel that gave them the information.

Carefully taking the three books out, he walks over to the table and sits down, opening the bag of candy.

-

A few hours and half a bag of candy later, Gabriel finally finished the books. If he was being honest, he was proud of those Men of Letters. They took the information he gave them and did a pretty good job of turning it into a book that did Angels justice.

For the most part.

Gabriel flips through the first one to the end where the references were.

_Loki – Norse Trickster god_

The corner of his mouth turns up. If only they’d known who they were _really_ dealing with. They might’ve treated him better, no trapping him in sigils meant for pagan gods. He was surprised they actually mentioned him. Although, this probably shouldn’t have been such an odd thing, considering he had given them most of the information.

Gabriel closes the book and opens the one about wings, turning to the page with the sketch that showed their anatomy. He runs his fingers over the wings inked into the paper. They looked amazing, all six spread wide and powerful. The feathers were straight and smooth, none of them bent.

Gabriel remembered posing for the sketch. He remembered the way he’d groomed his feathers beforehand so they’d look nice. He remembered the human who’d done it, the only one he’d trusted to do it.

Gabriel only realized he was crying when he heard Castiel sit down next him, carefully wrapping an arm around his shoulders.

_“It’s alright, brother. They will look like that again.”_

Gabriel nods, sniffling as he wiped the tears from his eyes, more taking their place. _“Thank you, Castiel.”_

_“You are welcome, Gabriel. I will help with whatever you need, just say the word.”_

Gabriel chuckles softly. _“Really, Cassy? Anything?”_

Castiel makes an exasperated noise. _“Within reason. You are still recuperating.”_

Gabriel pouts. _“But Cassy, it’s been so long,”_ he whines exaggeratedly.

_“You might want to save that enthusiasm for someone else, brother.”_

Gabriel freezes, his expression quickly becoming impassive. _“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Castiel.”_

Castiel rolls his eyes. _“And you call me dense,”_ he mutters.

Sam walks into the library, a plate of food in his hands. He stops when he sees the tear tracks on Gabriel’s face, giving Castiel a look of askance. The Angel nods and Sam moves to sit across from them. He glances at the books Gabriel was reading.

“Oh, is that the CGA?” he asks, trying to get a better look at the title.

Castiel and Gabriel give him a confused look.

“Sorry, that’s what I call it in my head. It’s easier than the full names. I actually abbreviate a lot of the longer book titles.” He pauses. “Uh, sorry. Don’t get me started on all that, I’d probably ramble on for hours. In fact, one time, I did. Dean had asked me how things were going with organizing the library and—” he cuts himself off, flushing slightly.

The corner of Gabriel’s mouth twitches upwards. ‘You’re cute, Samsquatch.’

Sam’s blush deepens. “Am not,” he mutters.

Gabriel grins at him and turns to Castiel. _“I’m ready now, Cassy. Let’s go back to my room.”_

Castiel nods and gets up, carefully brushing one of his wings against Gabriel’s as they walk to his room.

When they walk in, Castiel examines the walls, reading what was written. He gasps, eyes going wide.

Gabriel sits on the bed and looks down, not meeting his brother’s eyes. _“I didn’t want to forget. So, I wrote it out. I’m pretty sure Sam doesn’t know, or if he does, he hasn’t said anything.”_

Castiel nods, running his hands over the writing. _“Were you really in Heaven?”_

_“Yes. I didn’t intervene because it wasn’t my place. I was not meant to lead.”_

_“Neither was I,”_ Castiel says quietly.

Gabriel glances down guiltily. _“I know. And I’m sorry, Cassy. You shouldn’t’ve had to stand up to Raphael like that. Or Naomi for that matter.”_

_“No, I shouldn’t have.”_ He looks at Gabriel. _“But that was not your fault, brother. That was theirs.”_

Gabriel nods. _“I still wish I could’ve helped.”_

_“It’s alright.”_ He pauses. _“Why didn’t you reach out to me or the Winchesters after you first Fell?”_

_“I didn’t have any time. Metatron got me a day after and I didn’t think about it until it was too late. How would you have helped me anyway? You were human and the Winchesters don’t like me.”_

_“I would’ve tried to make them help you. Dean would’ve been hesitant, but I think Sam and myself could have convinced him.”_

_“Yeah. Thanks for that, Cassy.”_

_“You are welcome, Gabriel. Shall we begin?”_ he asks, gesturing to Gabriel’s wings,

He nods hesitantly, stretching out the lowest set. Castiel gets on the bed, sitting in front of Gabriel and assessing the damage.

_“I see your new feathers are growing in,”_ he says, running a hand over the pin feathers taking the place of the gaps.

Gabriel reaches out and straightens some of them as Castiel moves onto a clump of bent feathers. _“I noticed it after I got here. Hopefully they’ll come in better than my older ones did,”_ he says, gesturing to some of his underdeveloped feathers.

_“They will,”_ Castiel says, carefully separating a group of feathers that were bunched together.

_“I know. It’s just weird after all this time, thinking of a molt that won’t be painful.”_

_“Understandable. The second year I was on Earth, my molt was horrible. I was Falling, so my Grace was drained and none of my siblings could’ve helped me. The feathers came in weird, but I was lucky I could still fly. For the most part.”_

_“You could’ve asked me for help,”_ Gabriel says, trying to straighten some of the longer primaries.

_“No, Gabriel. I briefly considered it on one particularly bad day, but our relationship was not on the best of terms at that time.”_

Gabriel winces and Castiel draws back his hands. _“Are you alright?”_

_“Yeah, I’m good. I’m sorry about the way I acted in Wellington. I wasn’t trying to hurt you.”_

_“It is alright, brother. I understand your reasons, misguided though they were,”_ Castiel says, carefully unbending some of his coverts.

_“Thanks, Cassy. I don’t deserve your forgiveness.”_

_“That is incorrect, Gabriel. Everyone deserves forgiveness, no matter what they’ve done.”_

Gabriel nods, working along the leading edge of his wing. _“In that case, you might want to apply this to you as well.”_

Castiel looks down, drawing his hands away and not meeting his brother’s eyes. _“There are some sins, brother, that none can forgive.”_

Gabriel stays silent, not pressing the issue.

-

They finished Gabriel’s lowest set of wings within three hours. By that time, it was already late, so they went to Sam’s room and lied down on the bed, waiting for Sam to get there and lazily fixing each other’s feathers.

Sam came in an hour later and found the two Angels curled up on his bed, eyes closed and seemingly asleep. He knew they weren’t really, so he flips Gabriel over onto Castiel and takes up the newly vacant space.

Gabriel lets out an indignant noise and moves so he’s lying half on Castiel and half on Sam, forcing their feet to angle away from him so he had room.

Sam grumbles in discontent and Castiel chuckles. “Perhaps you will be more courteous next time, Sam. Use your words.”

Sam doesn’t acknowledge him as Gabriel lays his head against Sam’s shoulder, his hair getting in the younger Winchester’s face.

Sam scowls and gets the hair off of him, shifting into a slightly more comfortable position.

“Are we going to watch anything tonight?” Castiel asks.

“No,” Sam says tiredly. “I just wanna sleep.”

Gabriel nods in agreement. _“Unconsciousness sounds great,”_ he mumbles.

Castiel pulls the covers over them, mindful of where everyone was, and puts himself in a sleep-like state, Gabriel quickly following.

It takes Sam a little longer, but eventually he too drifts off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, thoughts? I genuinely enjoy getting any reviews, they seriously make my day.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's been so long, enjoy this new update.

A routine was quickly established for Castiel and Gabriel. They would do something in the morning, i.e. read in the library with Sam, go outside, help Sam with breakfast, etc. Then, later in the day, usually around twelve, they would go back to Gabriel’s room and work on his wings. After they got the more drastic stuff done, Gabriel would help Castiel with his.

Sam never questioned it. He was pretty sure he knew what they were doing, and saw no harm in it, However, he was a little disappointed that neither Castiel or Gabriel asked him to join them, seeing as he’d become quite adept at grooming wings over the past few years, but he didn’t push anything.

Although he didn’t show it, Castiel was becoming more and more worried about the length of Dean’s absence. He always reassured Sam that everything would be okay, not wanting to upset the younger Winchester. It worked, for the most part, Sam was calmer and didn’t mention it as often as he used to. But, Castiel could tell it was mostly for his sake that Sam said nothing, not wanting to burden the Angel.

Gabriel was quickly becoming used to the routine of the Bunker. It was frightening and he wasn’t looking forward to when Dean would get back, knowing it would drastically change the comfortable dynamic between him, Sam, and Castiel. It was selfish, and he knew this, to hope Dean wouldn’t be back for a long, long time.

Sam and Castiel noticed Gabriel’s increasingly restless behavior, their concern for the Archangel growing. They didn’t say anything about it, hoping it would sort itself out. Gabriel became more and more clingy, hardly letting either of them leave his side.

Neither Sam or Castiel minded much, taking it as a good sign that his recovery was coming along nicely, seeing as he didn’t flinch away nearly as much and sought out their company. Gabriel still spoke only in Enochian or used ASL, and they weren’t sure if he even wanted to speak English anymore.

It became a sort of unmentioned thing, who would spend their time with Gabriel and what they would do.

Eventually, however, something had to give

-

It was Castiel who snapped first.

About two and a half weeks after Gabriel got back and Dean went through the rift, he was sitting in the library with his brother while Sam was doing inventory of their spell ingredients in another room. Castiel noticed how Gabriel kept looking up at the rift whenever it fizzled into existence, a look of apprehension in his eyes.

After the fifth time, he slammed the book he was reading shut. Gabriel flinches and looks at Castiel, fear creeping into his expression when he sees the look on his brother’s face.

“Why do you keep doing that?” Castiel asks sharply.

Gabriel flinches and glances down, not meeting his brother’s eyes.

“Huh? I didn’t hear that. Demon got your tongue?” he asks scathingly.

Gabriel doesn’t look up, quaking in his seat as Castiel’s voice got louder.

“Why don’t you speak, Gabriel? Say what’s really going through your mind. I know you want to, I see it in the way you look sometimes. Tell me why you keep looking at the rift like that. Like you’re afraid or what’s going to come through.”

_“You know why,”_ he says carefully, his voice quivering.

“Do I, brother? Do I really? Have you given me any outward clues as to why?”

Silence.

Castiel scoffs, violently standing and causing Gabriel to flinch when his chair is thrown backwards. “I’ve tried to be patient, Gabriel. Indulging you when I could, pretending I didn’t hear the thoughts flashing through your mind. You are not as hard to read as you like to think.”

Gabriel lets out a whimper, curling in on himself and wishing the earth would swallow him.

“Not this time, brother. I’m done ignoring your behavior. To you, Dean is just another human, and one you don’t particularly like at that. But . . .” he trails off, clenching his jaw, “you know what he means to me. Imagine it were Sam in his place and try to understand before you cast any judgment.”

With one last hard look at Gabriel, Castiel storms off, passing a very confused Sam who had heard an argument and wanted to know what was going on.

He found Gabriel in the library, sitting on one of the chairs in the fetal position with tears in his eyes.

Immediately switching to crisis mode, Sam quickly gets into the chair next to Gabriel. “Hey, what’s wrong,” he asks carefully, not daring to reach out for fear of making the Archangel’s condition worse. “It’s okay, I’m right here.”

Gabriel glances at him, whimpering slightly.

“Is it Cas, did he do something?”

After a few seconds, he nods tentatively.

“Are you . . . okay?”

Gabriel doesn’t answer, looking down at the floor.

Sam lets out a small sigh, an uncomfortable expression twisting his face. “Do you wanna stay out here?”

Gabriel shakes his head. He halfheartedly gestures towards the hallway.

“You wanna go back to your room?”

Gabriel shakes his head again and gestures at Sam.

“My room?”

Gabriel nods.

“You need help or . . .”

Gabriel nods again.

Sam carefully stands and pulls Gabriel's chair out before lifting the Archangel and holding him against his chest. He walks back to his room and lays Gabriel down on his bed, pulling the covers over him.

Before he could walk away, Gabriel reaches out and stops him. Sam turns around and Gabriel glances down for a few seconds before looking up at Sam. “Stay, please,” he asks quietly, his voice trembling.

Sam smiles softly. “Of course,” he says, getting into the bed. Gabriel presses himself against him and Sam wraps an arm around his shoulders. He doesn't say anything for a few minutes, not entirely sure what Castiel did and/or said.

“So, uh . . . can you tell me what happened?” he asks eventually.

Gabriel shakes his head.

Sam nods. “It's alright, you don't have to.” He pauses. “I don't have to break out the Angel Blades, do I? Dean wouldn't be very happy if I killed his boyfriend.”

The corners of Gabriel's mouth twitch upwards and he shakes his head.

Sam chuckles. “Good. But I will have a few words with him.”

Gabriel nods. “Thank you, Sam,” he says quietly, glancing up at him.

“You're welcome, Gabe,” Sam says, tucking a stay hair behind Gabriel's ear.

The Archangel leans into the touch and Sam starts stroking his hair.

-

Later that night, Castiel goes into Sam’s room, head held down and staying in the doorway. Gabriel doesn't look at him and Sam regards him coldly.

“Hello Sam, Gabriel,” Castiel says carefully, glancing up at them.

“Hey, Cas,” Sam says stonily. “What do you want?”

“I am here to apologize.” He looks at Gabriel, who wouldn't meet his eyes. “It was wrong of me to ask for something you are not ready to give. I have no excuse, but understand that I have been beside myself with worry and my nerves are frayed. This in no way makes what I did right, however, I hope you can forgive me.”

Gabriel stays silent for a few seconds before looking up at Castiel. _“It’s okay, Cassy. I shouldn't’ve been so selfish.”_

“And I should not have been so cruel.” He pauses, an uncertain look on his face. “May I join you tonight?”

Sam glances at Gabriel, who nods and moves over to make room for Castiel. The Seraph walks over and climbs in, taking care to stay out of Gabriel's space.

The Archangel presses himself against Sam and he tentatively reaches out and takes Castiel’s hand. The Angel gently squeezes it and gives Gabriel a grateful look.

Gabriel nods and turns back to Sam.

-

Over the next few days, things were still tense between Castiel and Gabriel. They always had Sam to be a buffer for them and didn’t spend time alone anymore.

Sam was getting worried, hoping they’d be able to make up so he wouldn’t have to deal with the awkwardness that came whenever they were in the same room.

None of them spoke about it and mentioning Dean, or the rift, or the Apocalypse World became taboo. They were aware of the problem, it’s just they didn’t talk about it.

Gabriel and Castiel started spending more time with Sam, usually when it was just one-on-one. It didn’t bother him, but he tried to mend fences, since they seemed to favor avoiding each other, by speaking to them individually, and attempting to leave them alone together. It wasn’t very successful, but he could tell it was helping so he counted it as a win. Well, as much of a win as it could count as.

Castiel and Gabriel also stopped helping each other with their wings. They both felt guilty about it because of how difficult it could be without help, but Castiel went to Sam and hoped Gabriel would do the same.

Gabriel briefly considered it after he learned Castiel did, but stopped himself. It was tempting, oh so tempting, but he couldn’t. He couldn’t because it wouldn’t mean the same to Sam as it did to him.

When Gabriel had first realized his growing feelings for the younger Winchester, he’d ignored them.

_It doesn’t mean anything, it’s only because it’s been so long since I’ve been treated with kindness._

That’s what he told himself at least.

Now, Gabriel was too deep down the rabbit hole. Alice ain’t got nothin’ on him. He wouldn’t necessarily call what he felt _love_ , but it was _something_. Something he was trying to avoid at all cost, because Sam wouldn’t— _couldn’t_ feel the same way.

He was probably still upset about the Mystery Spot and T.V. Land incidents, and Gabriel understood that. Plus, Sam was straight, and while Gabriel _technically_ wasn’t a guy—but in fact a genderless, incorporeal being—he still had a male vessel, and that’s all that really mattered in this day and age.

So, he resigned himself to pining from afar. Castiel knew this and sympathized with him because he was in a similar position. The only difference at the moment was that Castiel couldn’t see the object of his affection and Gabriel practically had unlimited access. Neither of them were sure which was worse.

In the meanwhile, it seemed to Gabriel that Sam brushed off his comments and vague flirting attempts. To him, they might not have meant anything, but it hurt Gabriel how dismissive he was.

Still, he soldiered on. After all, it could be so much worse.


	5. Chapter 5

Looking back, Sam, Castiel, and Gabriel would realize what a bad idea it had been. In the moment, of course, it hadn’t seemed like this. Just another semi-normal thing to make sure Gabriel’s recovery was coming along smoothly. Or, well, as smoothly as it could when it came to the Winchesters.

-

“Hey, Gabriel,” Sam says, knocking on the Archangel’s door, “Can I come in?”

“Yeah.”

Sam opens the door and walks in, seeing Gabriel sitting on his bed, a hand extended and fiddling with something in the air next to him.

“Your wings bothering you?” Sam asks, on a hunch.

Gabriel freezes before carefully drawing his hand away and shifting his shoulders. ‘Yeah. Since Cassy stopped helping me, it’s been difficult.’

“Do you need help? I’m pretty sure Cas already told you, but I help him with his wings sometimes, so I’d be glad to help you too.”

An uncomfortable expression twists Gabriel’s face.

“It’s okay if you don’t, I get it.”

‘No, it’s not that.’

Sam gives him a confused look. “Is it . . . something I could fix.”

Gabriel chuckles ruefully. ‘In a way, I guess. Nothing you’d agree to.’

Sam’s confused expression remains. “Uh . . . okay. Are you sure, Gabe? I just want to help you.”

Gabriel glances up at him, the corner of his mouth twitching upwards. _“Help. It’s because of your help that I’m in this mess. It’s because of your kindness and compassion that I have these feelings,”_ he says, more to himself than Sam.

Sam raises an eyebrow, his expression otherwise impassive. “Um, I didn’t get that,” he says, clearing his throat.

‘Not for you. What do you need.’

“Oh, uh, Cas wanted to see how your Grace is healing up.”

Gabriel nods. ‘Tell him I will be out soon.’

“Got it,” Sam says, starting out the door. He pauses. “If, uh . . . you ever do need assistance with your wings, just ask. I’d be glad to help you.”

‘I know.’

Sam walks out and Gabriel sighs. He couldn’t blame the younger Winchester for wanting to aid him. This just wasn’t something he could fix.

-

“What did he say?” Castiel asks as Sam walks up and sits across from him.

“He said he’d be out soon.” Sam lets out a sigh, a thoughtful expression on his face.

“What’s up?” Castiel asks, recognizing the look on Sam’s face.

“It’s Gabriel. He said something and I . . . I’m not sure what to think.”

Castiel nods, an indiscernible look on his face. “Might I inquire as to what he said.”

Sam briefly considered telling the truth. After all, lying was what got them into most of their messes. However, there were times when saying a part of the truth was better than the whole. “I asked if he wanted help with his wings, but he said no. I asked if there was a way, but he gave me this really cryptic answer. Something like, ‘In a way, I guess. Nothing you’d agree to’.”

Castiel’s eyes widen fractionally. “Well, my brother is a . . . complicated being. What may, to him, seem . . . wrong, or incorrect might not be such a big deal to you. He has been around for a long, long time. Change and acceptance do not come easily for him.”

Sam nods. “I guess that makes sense. Could you talk with him about it?”

An uncomfortable expression twists Castiel’s face. “My brother and I have discussed this before. It is . . . a difficult topic for the both of us, and at the moment our relationship is not at its best.”

“I understand.” Sam pauses, glancing down. “You, uh, obviously know what he was talking about. I don’t suppose you could tell me?”

Castiel shakes his head. “If I did, the rift between us would only grow wider. It is best if you forget his words, unless he explains himself to you.”

“Okay. So, why do you want to see how his Grace is healing? Shouldn’t it be good by now.”

“I suspect he has not used it for a while, and it would be in our best interest to make sure he can direct it properly, lest he snap his fingers and accidentally cause you or myself to explode instead of summoning a candy bar.”

“Oh,” Sam says, his eyes widening. “That—that’s probably a good idea.”

“I thought so.” He glances up. “Hello, Gabriel.”

“Hey, Cassy,” The Archangel says, sitting next to him.

“Are you ready, brother?” Castiel asks.

“Yeah, let’s get this over with.”

Castiel nods and places a hand on Gabriel’s forehead. He glances at Sam. “It would probably be best if you were not present for this.”

Sam nods and gets up, walking out of the room.

Castiel turns his focus back to Gabriel, tentatively reaching out with his Grace. Gabriel reaches out with his own, much weaker than it should’ve been, but stronger than before.

_“How do you want to test it, brother?”_ Castiel asks.

Gabriel pauses, mulling over his options. Eventually, he figures it out. Castiel agrees, helping him reach out his Grace and Gabriel snaps his fingers.

A high-pitched noise sounds from the kitchen. A few seconds later, Sam runs in. “What did you do?” he asks, looking at the Angel’s accusingly.

“Relax, Samsquatch,” Gabriel says. “I just changed all your healthy foods to candy, ‘cause it’s better for ya.”

Sam nods and takes a deep breath. “Change it back.”

“No can do, Sammy.”

Sam clenches his jaw and looks down. “Gabriel . . . please,” he says quietly.

Surprise alights the Archangel’s face and memories flit through his mind. Memories of death, tricks, pain, and time—so much lost time. His expression softens and he snaps his fingers.

Sam flinches and looks up.

Gabriel gives him a sympathetic smile and Castiel looks at him worriedly.

“Fixed it, Samshine,” Gabriel says.

Sam nods, breathing a sigh of relief. “Thanks, Gabe. How’s your Grace doing.”

Gabriel shrugs. ‘Been better. How are you doing?’

“Good.” He pauses when his phone starts ringing.

“Hello?”

**‘Samuel. I hope you’re having a pleasant day.’** They all freeze when the recognize the familiar voice. **‘It’s come to my attention you boys have something that belongs to me, and I’d like it back.’**

Gabriel whimpers.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Sam says.

**‘Oh, I believe you do. And I’m-a give you one chance to return him to me. No harm, no foul.’**

“I’m hanging up.”

**‘Do not hang up on me. Gabriel is of no use to you with his Grace as low as it is. Should you choose to resist me, I will have no choice but to take him by force. I will reduce you and that sad little Bunker of yours to ashes. You got 10 minutes to decide. Now you can hang up.’**

The call disconnects and Sam puts his phone back in his pocket.

Gabriel lets out a whimper and draws his legs up to his chest.

“It’s alright, brother,” Castiel reassures quickly. “We won’t let him hurt you.”

Gabriel nods. “I know,” he says quietly. “But you don’t know what he’s like. He’ll find a way, he always does.”

Sam shakes his head. “Not this time.”

-

After ten minutes passed, the electricity shut down and the alarms started blaring, casting a red light on the walls.

Sam and Castiel grab their Angel Blades and cautiously walk to the map room, anticipating an attack.

It comes a few seconds later in the form of two demons jumping them from behind. Sam whirls around and grabs one of them by its arm and pins it to the map table, stabbing it in the chest before the next demon pins him down.

Castiel is less lucky and gets thrown back by one of the demons, falling on the floor. He quickly gets up and stabs the demon before going over to Sam and ripping away the demon pinning him. Castiel quickly pins it to the control panel and places a hand on its forehead, letting his Grace flow through and burn it out.

“Thanks,” Sam says.

Castiel nods before getting thrown against a wall with Sam, Asmodeus appearing in the entrance to the library.

“Your warding wasn’t designed for the likes of me, Samuel,” the demon says, meandering forward. They struggle against the force holding them down as he approaches. “I’ve come to claim what’s mine.”

Sam and Castiel watch in horror as two demons drag Gabriel from the library and in front of Asmodeus.

“Oh, I missed you, boy,” the demon says, grinning cruelly. “I’ma have to punish you rather severely, I’m afraid.”

Gabriel flinches and whimpers, averting his eyes and glancing at Sam and Castiel.

They watch helplessly as the demons start dragging Gabriel up the stairs.

“And as for you two . . .” Asmodeus says, walking up to them. He gets a predatory gleam in his eyes and clenches his hands, causing pain to lance through them.

They gasp in pain and clench their eyes shut, their world dimming to just pain.

Gabriel struggles against the demons holding him as they reach the platform, seeing what Asmodeus was doing to Sam and Castiel. He closes his eyes and reaches deep down, channeling his Grace. Gabriel’s eyes fly open, his irises obscured by a blue glow.

Channeling his anger, he flings the two demons over the railing and steps forward, hands tightening around the banister as he quivers in rage.

“Gabriel!” Asmodeus exclaims. “What are you doin’, son? You know too well what I can do to you. I _broke_ you!”

Gabriel lets out a growl and looks up, eyes glowing blue against the red light surrounding them.

“You’re too weak!”

Gabriel lets go of the railing, head held high and shoulders back as he flares his wings out, their shadows thrown upon the walls behind him. The Grace in his eyes dim as Asmodeus gathers energy in his hands and flings it at him.

Gabriel bats it away with the back of his palm and glares at him defiantly. “Not anymore,” he says. “Oh, by the way, I always hated that dumbass suit.” His eyes glow again and he extends an arm, grinning as he made Asmodeus go up in flames.

Sam and Castiel look away, putting their arms over their eyes as the demon burns away. After the light vanishes, they look up at Gabriel incredulously.

A few seconds later, Gabriel’s cool demeanor crumbles, worry etching itself on his face. He spreads his wings and clumsily flies down to Sam and Castiel, effectively crash-landing at their feet.

_“Gabriel!”_ Castiel exclaims, him and Sam moving forward to check on him.

“I’m alright, Cassy,” Gabriel says, waving them off. “Are you guys okay?”

“Yeah,” Sam says, wincing. “It wasn’t as bad as it looked.”

“Good,” Gabriel says, nodding and slumping against the wall.

 “Are you alright, brother?” Castiel asks worriedly.

“Yeah, yeah, stop worrying about me.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah, Cassy. I’m sure. Just gimme a minute.”

A few seconds of blissful silence pass before Castiel says, “That was very reckless of you Gabriel.”

The Archangel tiredly glares at him. “Yeah, like I was gonna let Asmodeus hurt you two.”

Castiel shakes his head. “Not that. You should not have flown down here.”

Gabriel gives him an incredulous look. “That’s what’s got you?”

“Yes. If you’d misjudged it, you could have been thrown anywhere in the world, or out of it.”

Gabriel rolls his eyes. “I did fine. Not gonna try it again for a while, but okay for now.”

Castiel gives him a disproving look.

“You need to be more careful, Gabe,” Sam says.

“Not you too,” Gabriel whines.

Sam gives him a disproving look.

Caught in between, Gabriel could do nothing but bend to their wishes. “I already said I wouldn’t do it again. Sorry for scaring you.”

They nod, seemingly satisfied.

“Anything else you wanna berate me for?”

Castiel perks up. “Well, there was that time you lost me and Balthazar—”

“I already apologized for that, it’s settled,” Gabriel says with a tone of finality.

Sam snickers and Gabriel mock-glares at him.

“And _what_ , pray tell, is so funny?”

Sam grins. “You two, acting like brothers. Reminds me of how De—” he cuts himself off, clearing his throat. “How, uh . . .” He trails off, not sure what to say.

They all glance at the rift in the library, Sam and Castiel with worry and Gabriel with apprehension.

“Anyways,” the Archangel says, snapping them out of their stupor, “I think it’s getting late, so we should probably hit the sack.”

Sam and Castiel nod in agreement and follow Gabriel back to Sam’s room.


	6. Chapter 6

Gabriel should’ve known it wouldn’t last forever. The peace and camaraderie that had developed between him, Sam, and Castiel. It was bound to happen eventually. After all, all secrets must see the Light, no matter how deep they’re kept in the Dark.

-

Sam lets out another sigh as he closes the book he’d been skimming.

Gabriel glances up from Sam’s laptop, which he’d been tentatively allowed access to as long as he didn’t watch porn. “What is it?”

Sam slides the book away from him and rubs a hand over his face. “There’s this box I found in one of the artifact rooms that I can’t get open. I’ve been searching, but I can’t find a way past this warding. I even tried looking through the Men of Letters’ records to see if there was any mention of it, and nothing.”

“Let me see it,” Gabriel says, holding out a hand.

Sam picks up a long, thin box from the chair next to him and hands it over. It was about a foot long and five inches wide with wards and sigils etched into the dark wood. “Woah,” he says, running a hand along the carvings. “This is some serious stuff. Like, top of the line. Whatever’s in here must be pretty special.”

Sam sighs. “Could you open it?”

“No, it’s warded against Angels.” He gets a confused look on his face and inspects it closer. “That’s odd,” he mutters.

“What?”

Gabriel points to a group or runes in the center of the box, bigger than the rest. “Those are my symbols. Gabriel, the messenger and—” he blinks in surprise, eyes growing wide. “What’s that doing there?” he says quietly, running a finger over one of the carvings.

“Um, care to tell me what you found?”

“Hm,” Gabriel says, glancing at Sam. His expression quickly becomes impassive. “Oh, it’s nothing,” he says hastily, handing the box back.

Sam gives him an odd look. “Uh-huh. Anyways, you got any ideas on how to open it?”

“Nope. But, I’d be careful if I were you. That’s some serious spell work there, and one wrong move could probably wipe this place off the map.”

“Got it,” Sam says, eyeing the box warily.

“I’m sure you’ll be fine,” Gabriel says, looking back to the computer.

-

Later that day, Castiel joined them and looked over the box, saying pretty much the same thing as Gabriel. He stuck around to help with the research, also wanting to know what was inside.

“I think I have it,” Castiel says triumphantly, running his fingers over the side of the box.

“Really?” Sam and Gabriel ask, looking up from their stuff.

“Yes. See this right here,” he says, showing them one of the corners.

“See what?” Sam asks, squinting at it.

“Right here,” Castiel says, gingerly pointing to a small imperfection on one of the sides right next to it.

“What is it?” Gabriel asks.

“I believe it is a button of sorts.”

“Well, press it, Cassy,” Gabriel says impatiently.

Castiel runs his fingers over the button and they hear a small click.

A few seconds pass, and nothing happens.

“Uh, was that it?” Sam asks.

“No,” Castiel says, gesturing to a key-hole that had appeared on one of the sides.

Sam sighs. “Great, now I gotta get my lockpicks.”

“Not so fast, Sammy,” Gabriel says as the younger Winchester starts to get out of his chair. “Given the intricate spell work on the outside, it can probably only be opened with a particular key.”

Sam takes the box and inspects the keyhole. “It’s too small for the Bunker key, and that’s the only one I could think of. Except the key to Oz, but I’m pretty sure that’s not it.”

Gabriel shrugs. “Oh well. Have fun, you two,” he says, going back to the show he was watching on Netflix.

-

After a few hours, Sam and Castiel gave up their research, determined to pick it up tomorrow, and instead perused the library.

Gabriel shakes his head. “I don’t understand how you two can do it. Stare at books for work all day, then start reading others for pleasure.”

Without looking up, they say, “It’s fun.”

Gabriel glances between the two of them, something akin to incredulity in his eyes.

“Plus,” Sam adds, “I didn’t see you complaining the first few weeks you were here when you had nothing to do but read.”

Gabriel gets an affronted look on his face. “That’s because it was purely for my enjoyment. No research.”

Sam rolls his eyes. “Yeah, yeah. Whatever you say, Gabe.”

Gabriel raises his head haughtily, not meeting their eyes. After a few seconds, he huffs out a breath and goes back to Sam’s laptop.

-

“Are you still mad at me for Mystery Spot and T.V. Land?” He’s not sure why he asks it. Perhaps it’s some twisted form of curiosity, maybe it’s something else. No matter the reason, it’s been said.

Sam and Castiel look up in surprise, eyes wide as they stare at him.

Gabriel shifts uncomfortably under their looks.

Sam clears his throat and licks his lips. “Uh . . . what do you mean by that?”

Well, that certainly inspired confidence. “I mean, are you still upset at me. Because of it.”

Sam pauses, an indiscernible look on his face.

“I forgive you, brother,” Castiel says. “I do not believe it was your intention to hurt me, and you apologized, so I have no lingering resentments.”

“You apologized to him?” Sam asks quickly.

“Yeah, a little while back.”

Sam nods.

Gabriel regards him with an interested look, a glimmer of mischief in his eyes. “Sam . . . I never meant to be so bad to you. It’s one thing I said that I would never do.”

Sam chuckles before he pauses, his eyebrows furrowing. After a few seconds, he gives Gabriel a bitchface. “ _ Really _ ?” he asks, the word dripping with disapproval.

Gabriel snickers. “Yep,” he says, grinning.

Sam rolls his eyes, a smile tugging the corner of his lips.

Gabriel isn’t sure why he does it. It was probably all his simmering feelings rising to the surface, unable to contain themselves in the split second his walls were down. Whatever the reason, he leans across the table and pulls Sam in for a kiss.

It wasn’t long or particularly notable compared to others he’d had—there wasn’t even any tongue. Sam sat there in stunned silence for a few seconds before Gabriel pulls back, his eyes widening in shock as he realizes what he did.

Castiel watches them with an expression torn between relief and fear.

Sam stares at Gabriel, frozen in his seat.

Realizing he’d fucked everything up, yet again, Gabriel runs. Like he always does. He runs back to his room, locking the door behind him and curling up into a ball on his bed.

He was so screwed.

-

A few seconds after Gabriel fled, Sam shook himself out of his stupor and started to get out of his chair. Castiel stops him by grabbing his wrist.

“Sam, wait,” he says, pulling him back to the chair.

“He—he just . . . he . . .” Sam says, obviously in shock.

“Yes, I know. I saw it.”

“Gabriel . . . h-he . . .”

“It’s alright, Sam.”

The younger Winchester gives him a look that could only be described as lost. Like his brain couldn’t keep up with what just happened. “I-it’s not, Gabriel . . . he—he . . .  _ kissed me _ .”

“Sam, calm down.”

“I—I can’t. Gabriel . . .”

“Kissed you, Sam. Yes, he did.”

“Why?”

At that moment, Castiel understood why sometimes people had the urge to bang their heads against solid objects. “Because he . . .” Castiel pauses. Gabriel hadn’t specified the extent of his feelings for the younger Winchester. Oh, well. Improvisation usually worked in situation like this. Or so he hoped.

“Do you know what  _ ludus _ means, Sam?”

The word seemed to draw him out of the shock a little. “Uh, yeah. It was on of the words the Greeks used for love.”

“Good. Gabriel feels that towards you.”

Sam gets a mildly confused look on his face before he lets out a sigh of relief. “Oh, thank God.”

“I don’t understand what is so good about this situation.”

“ _ Ludus _ means playful love, right? Like the kind between friends?”

“In a way, yes. But it also could mean in the romantic way, which is the point I’m trying to get across.”

Sam’s eyes widen. “R-romantic? Hm.” He looks down at the table, struck speechless.

Castiel takes in a measured breath. “I don’t know any better way to describe it, seeing as Gabriel was less than forthcoming with the details.”

Sam glances up at him, realization taking hold. “That’s why he said it.”

“Said what?” Castiel asks, confused.

“A few days ago, I told you he said something odd. Remember?”

“Yes. This is why I couldn’t say anything about it.”

“Well, I lied.”

Castiel blinks in surprise.

“Well, technically.”

“How so?” Castiel asks carefully.

“What actually had me confused was something he muttered in Enochian. I almost didn’t catch it, but it was something like, ‘Help. It’s because of your help that I’m in this mess. It’s because of your kindness and compassion that I have these feelings’.”

Castiel nods before a look of confusion crosses his face. “You understand Enochian?”

Sam flinches and nods sheepishly. “Uh, yeah. A little something I picked up in the Cage.”

Knowing not to press anymore, Castiel nods again. “Well, that does make a little more sense now.” He looks back to the hallway. “Should we check on him?”

Sam’s eyes widen. “Oh, God,” he says, shock laced in his voice. “Gabriel  _ kissed _ me.”

Castiel hits his head against the table.


	7. Chapter 7

The next day was tense. Gabriel and Sam kept their distance from each other while Castiel watched worriedly. No one mentioned what happened in the library yesterday, the incident falling into the taboo of mentioning Dean and the rift.

Castiel was getting tired of it. He never made it a priority to mess in the love lives of his brothers, or humans for that matter, but he was willing to make an exception in this case. The only thing he wanted right now was to fix the awkwardness between Sam and Gabriel. And maybe knowledge on how to do it. Angels weren’t taught on how to patch things up after something went wrong.

Castiel wished Dean was there. Dean would know what to do. He always did. Not that he would really want to help with this particular situation, given the circumstances.

Gabriel and Sam were content to pretend the kiss never happened, even if it didn’t get rid the uncomfortableness they felt.

“So, you guys find a way to open that box yet?” Gabriel asks, hoping to disperse the awkward silence

Sam and Castiel glance up from their books. “No, not yet. Research is coming pretty slow.”

Gabriel nods.

The awkward silence returns.

After about fifteen minutes Castiel shuts his book and gets up, muttering something under his breath and leaving the room. Gabriel catches the words ‘idiots’ and ‘can’t deal’.

Sam nervously clears his throat and Gabriel flinches.

“So . . .” Sam starts. “Yesterday—”

“No, Sam,” Gabriel says quickly. “Let’s not do this. It was an accident, and it won’t happen again.”

Sam nods. “Got it.” He pauses. “But we—”

“I said no.”

Sam huffs. “Fine,” he says, obviously affronted as he went back to his book.

Gabriel lets out a sigh and leaves the room.

-

Later that night they lie in Sam’s bed, Castiel between Sam and Gabriel. Funny how the job of ‘buffer’ could be so easily shifted. Even though it put him on better terms with his brother, Castiel still didn’t like it. He wished they would just suck it up and  _ talk _ about it.

Castiel chuckles. Yeah, like that was ever going to happen.

With that one thought, a dangerous idea formed in his mind. A very dangerous, possibly insane idea.

Carefully as he could, Castiel extracts himself from the middle of the bed and walks to the doorway. With as much stealth as he could muster, Castiel gets the Angel-Cuffs from the dungeon and goes back to the room. After making sure Sam and Gabriel were truly asleep, he cuffs their wrists together.

It was a horrible idea, it truly was. One that could go wrong in a million possible ways.  _ But _ , Castiel thinks to himself as he looks back into the room,  _ it could also go very right _ . With that last thought, he closes the door and locks it with his Grace.

Those two weren’t getting out of there until they talked, if it was the last thing he ever did.

-

_ “Castiel!” _ The shout reverberates throughout the Bunker and Angel Radio, so loudly the other Angels probably heard it up in Heaven.

Acting as calm and collected as he could while freaking out on the inside, Castiel walks to Sam’s door, which Gabriel was furiously pounding on.

“You rang, brother.”

“Get in here you meddling piece of—”

“Gabriel!” Sam exclaims, scandalized. “Stop pounding on the door.”

“I will once my idiot brother gets in here and takes off these cuffs!”

“That will only happen after you two talk,” Castiel says.

There’s a pause and Gabriel stops pounding on the door.

“About the kiss,” he clarifies, afraid they didn’t know what he was talking about.

“No,” comes the firm answer. Of course Gabriel was being stubborn.

“Y’know, he has a point,” Sam says quietly.

There’s a silence.

“Fine!” Gabriel exclaims exasperatedly. “I don’t see why in Dad’s name we have to, but fine!”

Castiel nods triumphantly. “Good. Have fun, you two.”

Gabriel mutters something about meddling brothers and curses under his breath.

-

A few minutes later saw Sam and Gabriel sitting across from each other on the bed, avoiding eye contact and not speaking.

“I’m waiting,” Castiel says from outside the room.

Sam sighs.

Gabriel huffs and stubbornly clenches his jaw.

“If you don’t speak, I’ll leave you in there forever.”

“I already said we would,” Gabriel snaps. “Just give it a bit.”

Wisely, Castiel doesn’t reply.

Gabriel sighs and scratches the back of his head. “Look, Sam . . . I have . . .  _ feelings _ . For you.”

Sam gives him a bitchface. “Really?” he says. “I would never have guessed.”

Gabriel glares at him. “Look, I can’t explain it. I don’t even know when it started, it just . . . happened.”

“Gabriel . . . I don’t have feeling for you.” Sam tries to ignore the hurt look in the Archangel’s eyes, failing miserably. “Not to say I . . .  _ couldn’t _ . Eventually, over time.”

Gabriel nods, not meeting Sam’s eyes.

“It’s just . . .” He breathes out through his nose. “I don’t know. This is all so weird, and I have no clue what to say.”

“Yeah.”

Silence descends.

After a minute, Castiel asks, “Have you two made up yet?”

“If I say yes, will you believe me?” Gabriel asks hopefully.

There’s a pause before, “No.”

Gabriel sighs. “Sam, I’d love to pretend this never happened, but  _ somebody _ ,” he glares pointedly at the door, “won’t let us. So, I say we just accept the fact that I . . .  _ like _ you.” He says the word like it leaves a weird taste in his mouth.

“And do nothing about it?”

“Aren’t you Winchesters, like, the kings of repressing stuff? I’m sure you’ll be fine.”

Sam shakes his head. “No, Gabe. Look, I like you—just not like that. However . . .” He trails off, a slight blush staining his cheeks. “I—I don’t know.”

“Sam . . . I dunno how to do this. Can’t we just let it go?”

“I don’t think Cas’ll let us. It’s just . . . I never really thought about it.”

“I didn’t either. It snuck up on me.”

“Yeah.” He takes in a deep breath. “Look, Gabe . . . I don’t want this to come between us. We had a pretty good thing going and I don’t wanna let that go.”

“I don’t either.” He glances at the door. “So, uh . . . we good?”

“Yeah, we’re good.”

“Can I let you two out now?” Castiel asks.

“Yes,” they say.

The door opens and Castiel walks in, grinning. He takes off the cuffs and asks, “So, how’d it go?”

Gabriel glares at him. “You heard everything.”

“Of course I did. I’m just glad you two are doing better.”

Sam rolls his eyes and gets off the bed. “You’re gonna help me find that key, I don’t care how long it takes.”

Castiel nods. “I know. I’ll start soon.”

“You’ll start now.”

“Yes, yes I will,” Castiel says hastily, rushing out of the room.

“Chills, Sam,” Gabriel deadpans.

Sam lets out a sigh and walks after Castiel.

-

After a few hours of fruitless searching, Sam and Castiel were ready to throw in the towel. Coming to a silent agreement, they stopped searching through the artifact room and started walking out.

Before he reaches the door, Castiel sees an item on a nearby shelf that catches his eye. Curious, he walks forward and picks up the rosary. There was a kind of magic emanating from it, but he couldn’t place it.

Suddenly, it leaps from his hands and wraps itself around his neck, pressing tightly around him. Feeling annoyed, Castiel tries to pull it off, but to no avail.

“Hey, Cas,” Sam says, walking back into the room. “you alri—” He stops himself when he sees Castiel wrestling with something around his neck. “Is that a rosary?”

“Yes,” Castiel says. “I was inspecting it when it decided to wrap itself around my neck. It won’t come off.”

“Uh . . . do you need any help?”

“I am not sure,” he says, taking his hands away from his neck. “it’s just uncomfortable and is not reacting well with my Grace.”

“Well, it looks tight. What do you mean it’s not reacting well with your Grace?”

“Imagine the same end of two magnets pushing against each other. It’s something like that. The rosary is trying to press itself against my flesh, and my Grace is attempting to push it away.”

“Oh. Do you know how to get it off?”

“No. Perhaps my brother does.”

“Yeah, let’s go see,” Sam says, walking out of the room with Castiel close behind.

-

Gabriel glances up when he hears a knock on his door. “Come in,” he says.

Castiel and Sam walk in and Gabriel notices Castiel clutching at something around his neck.

“Is that a rosary?”

“Yes, it appears to be trying to strangle me. Can you remove it?”

Gabriel blinks in surprise. “Uh, maybe. Let me see,” he says, walking over to him.

Castiel takes his hands away and Gabriel steps closer, inspecting the rosary.

“Well, I dunno what it is, but it’s a good thing you’re not human otherwise this thing would’ve killed you. I also don’t know how to remove it. Sorry.”

“It is alright, Gabriel. We will just need to find another way.”

Sam pauses, a considerable look on his face. “We could call Rowena.”

Gabriel perks up. “Rowena? She’s still around.”

“Yeah. She helps us sometimes. Should I call her?”

“If you’re on good terms with her. She’ll probably know what to do.”

“Got it, I’ll be right back,” Sam says, walking out of the room.

Gabriel turns to Castiel and raises an eyebrow. “So, any particular reason you picked up some random rosary in a room of dangerous magical objects, or were you just feeling reckless?”

Castiel looks down guiltily. “I don’t know.”

Gabriel shakes his head. “Oh, Cassy. Whatever will I do with you.”

Castiel mock-glares at him. “I don’t think it particularly matters, brother.”

Gabriel opens his mouth to say something, but stops when Sam walks in. “You call her?”

“Uh, no. I was just getting my phone. You two can probably explain this to her better than I could.”

“True, true,” Gabriel says as Sam sits on the other side of the bed, opening his phone and pulling up his contacts.

**‘Hello, boys. I’m very sure I’ve done nothing that ya ken to make you want to call, but how lovely to hear from you.’**

“Actually, Dean’s not here right now.”

**‘Oh, what a shame. I guess you’ll be needing my help getting him out of whatever mess he’s managed to get himself into.’**

“Actually, no. It’s Cas. He got himself tangled with some magic item, quite literally actually.”

**‘Oh! The handsome Angel is there, isn’t he? Hello tweetie pie.’**

“Um . . . hello,” Castiel says awkwardly.

“Aw, what about me Ro?” Gabriel says. “Surely it hasn’t been that long.”

There’s a pause.  **‘Loki, is that you?’**

“Yep. How you doin’?”

**‘Better than you. Last I heard, you were dead.’**

“I got over it.”

She chuckles.  **‘Anyways, what seems to be the problem?’**

“Cassy found a rosary in the Bunker that’s trying to strangle him.”

**‘A rosary? I’ve never heard of anything like that.’**

“That’s why we’re calling you,” Sam says. “We didn’t know what else to do.”

**‘Lads, obviously I’d love to help after what Sam did for me. But I’m in the damp Pacific Northwest right now, working on my own little project.’**

“Project? What project?”

**‘Oh, nothing for you to worry about. Just checking a few items off my little “to do” list. I could probably help you as soon as I’m done.’**

“How long will that take?” Castiel asks.

**‘Well, that depends. I can’t be sure but I’ll call you as soon as I’m done.’**

“Rowena, wait,” Gabriel says as she ends the call.

“Damn,” Sam says. “Guess we’ll have to wait ‘til she’s done.” He looks at Castiel. “You good for now?”

“Yes. It’s not very comfortable, but I can deal.”

“Good. Sorry for barging in like that, Gabe,” Sam says, nodding his head apologetically.

“It’s alright, kiddo. Just don’t go making a habit of it.”

Sam chuckles and gets off the bed, walking out the door.

Gabriel leans against the headboard and glances at Castiel, who was still sitting on the edge of his bed. “You need something, Cassy?”

Castiel looks away. “I was just wondering . . . if you would not be averse to helping me with my wings once again, and I with yours.”

Gabriel blinks in surprise. He hadn’t been expecting that. “Uh . . . no, I wouldn’t mind.”

Castiel smiles at him. “I am glad to hear that.”

“C’mere Castiel,” Gabriel says, reaching out an arm.

His brother complies and crawls forward, sitting next to him and leaning against the headboard.

Gabriel wraps an arm around his shoulder and runs his fingers through the feathers along the leading edge of one of Castiel’s wing. The Angel sighs contentedly and starts stroking one of Gabriel’s wings.


	8. Chapter 8

Now that he wasn’t dealing with reckless Angels and trigger-happy rosaries, Sam had some time to think. Of course, his thoughts gravitated to the kiss he and Gabriel shared a week ago and the conversation Castiel forced them to have. It was what he thought about most often nowadays. He’d be eating something in the kitchen when—BAM! Intrusive thoughts!

It would be annoying, except he still needed to analyze how he felt about it. The conversation had helped, but his thoughts were still a jumbled mess. Now, well, he had time.

Sam wasn’t a stranger to his feelings. He liked to think he had a pretty good handle on them, or was at least semi-aware of how they worked. In this case, however, he was lost. It’s not that he didn’t like Gabriel, it’s that he didn’t like him like  _ that _ .

He couldn’t say he hadn’t thought about it, but that had been years ago. Back when they first met at the college. Before they discovered what he was, Sam may or may not have noted the inherent attractiveness of the janitor that showed them the room the professor jumped from.

It’s not like he never noticed other men before, Sam had long since come to terms with his flexible sexuality. And he was disappointed when they discovered him as the Trickster they were hunting. After that, though, his feelings faded. But now . . .

Sam shakes his head. No. He couldn’t. He couldn’t take advantage of Gabriel like that. It wouldn’t be fair to the Archangel for him to dredge up his old feelings and bait him like that.

Besides, he didn’t still feel that way. It’d been so long ago, and it hadn’t even really been anything particularly big. Just an admiration of his humor, personality, and facial features.

He shouldn’t even be considering it. It wasn’t right. Gabriel deserved someone better than him. Better than a broken man who couldn’t even properly deal with his feelings.

Sam glances up when his door opens.

“Hey,” Gabriel says.

“Hey. You doing okay?”

“Yeah,” he says, walking forward and sitting on the end of the bed. “Cassy’s been wrestling with that rosary for the past hour now with no luck. It’s pretty funny to watch.”

Sam chuckles. “I bet. He’s not in any danger, is he?”

“Nah, I’m sure he’s fine.” He pauses, a vaguely uncomfortable look on his face. “Can I, uh . . .” He gestures to a spot next to Sam.

Sam chuckles. “Yeah,” he says, moving over and raising his arm up.

Gabriel lies down next to him, keeping a few inches between them.

In a moment of what was either boldness, stupidity, or some odd combination of the two, Sam pulls Gabriel closer to him so there was no space separating them. Gabriel lets out a small noise of protest before resigning himself and curling against Sam’s chest.

-

The next day, Castiel was still fighting with the rosary. Sam and Gabriel walked in on him in the library, a knife raised to his neck.

“Whoa there, Cassy,” Gabriel says. “Careful with that thing.”

“I will, brother,” he says, carefully trying to cut it with no luck.

Sam raises an eyebrow and nods. “You two want anything? I’m gonna get breakfast.”

“I’m fine, Sam,” Castiel says.

“I’ll take some pancakes ‘nd syrup.” Seeing the look on Sam’s face, Gabriel pouts. “I’ll settle for waffles,” he says hopefully.

Sam shakes his head and walks to the kitchen.

Gabriel sits down across from Castiel and eyes the rosary. “Y’know, Karma’s a bitch, but she really has her priorities straight.”

Castiel pauses, putting his knife on the table. “What do you mean, brother?”

Gabriel grins. “You locked me and Sam up a few days ago, now you’re the one tangled in something.”

Castiel glares at him. “Are you still upset about that?”

“Yes,” Gabriel says petulantly.

Castiel rolls his eyes. “I did what I had to do. Otherwise, you and Sam would never have talked about it.”

“You don’t know that.”

Castiel gives him a look. “No, of course I don’t,” he says sarcastically. “It’s not like I have witnessed how Winchesters deal with important things in their lives and know that you would do the same. Not at all.”

Gabriel glares at him. “I’m not gonna dignify that with a response,” he says, picking a random book from a shelf and starting to read.

Castiel lets out a sigh and picks the knife back up.

-

“We got a problem,” Sam says, walking into the library with his tablet and two plates of eggs. He sets one in front of Gabriel and sits down next to him.

“What kinda problem?” Gabriel asks, eyeing his eggs disdainfully.

Sam sets the tablet down so they could all see it. “Remember what Rowena said on the phone about being in the Pacific Northwest? Well, I also heard what sounded like a party in the background and did a little digging.”

“A rich lady exploded?”

“Yeah. Local cops are calling it spontaneous combustion, but . . . pretty much.”

Castiel takes a closer look at the article. “That does sound like Rowena.”

“How’d she get the juice to pull that off?” Gabriel asks. “Last I checked, the head witches bound some of her powers.”

Sam clears his throat. “I, uh . . . I gave her a page from the Black Grimoire. It helped her get them back.”

Gabriel nods. “I can’t tell if that was a really good, or really bad idea.”

Sam shrugs. “She wanted to protect herself.”

“By burning someone alive?” Castiel asks.

“We don’t know what this is yet. Maybe she had a reason.”

Castiel shifts uncomfortably in his seat.

“Okay, I said if Rowena goes bad again, I’ll deal with it, so I’ll deal with it.”

“Sam, Rowena doesn’t do anything without a reason,” Gabriel says. “Her methods may be skewed, but she probably has her priorities straight.”

Sam nods. “Still, I can’t let her go around killing people.”

Gabriel shrugs. “Okay. I’ll go with you to check it out.”

“Me too,” Castiel says.

Sam and Gabriel share an uncomfortable look.

“What?”

“Well . . .” Sam trails off.

“You can’t really go out in public with that thing around your neck,” Gabriel supplies.

Castiel attempts to glare at the rosary. “Yes, I suppose so. I’ve been meaning to check out things in Heaven anyways, so I guess now would be the best time.”

“Is that really a good idea?” Sam asks.

“I’m not really sure, but I need to know how things are going.”

Sam nods. “Just be careful.”

“I will. Have fun with Rowena,” he says, walking out of the library.

“We will,” Gabriel says. “Have fun with our smite-happy siblings.”

“I will,” he says from the map room.

-

Gabriel lets out another sigh as the call gets dropped.

“Still no answer?” Sam asks.

“Nope.”

Sam sighs. “Y’know, I really do hope there’s a reason behind this. Otherwise . . .”

“Yeah, I know.”

“Maybe she just had bad cell reception,” a voice says from the backseat.

They look back in surprise and Sam slams the brakes. After realizing there was no one there, he pulls off to the side of the road. When they face forward, they see a woman standing in front of the car.

“What the Hell?” Gabriel says as he and Sam scramble out of the car.

“You know her?” Sam asks.

“No, he doesn’t,” the woman says. “My name is Jessica and I’m a Reaper.”

“Okay,” Sam says. “What’s a Reaper doing here.”

She gives them an odd look. “Didn’t Dean tell you about me?”

“Nooo,” Sam says slowly.

She nods. “As expected. Pity. Honestly, it was sad watching him go this long without telling Sam about me.”

“Wait, hold on a second,” Gabriel says. “What do you mean ‘watching’.”

“Well, after Dean’s little trip to the Veil, Death asked me to keep an eye on him and Sam, in case.”

“In case of what?”

“This, I guess. I don’t ask Death questions. Never goes well.”

Sam scoffs. “So what, you—you’ve just been . . . hovering around us, invisible, like a—like a babysitter?”

“No, no, more like a baby monitor.”

Sam nods. “And—and you’ve seen, um . . .”

“Oh, everything,” she says with a smile.

“You mean, like, everything everything?” Gabriel asks.

“I’m especially fond of Sam’s impressive . . . extensive array of hair products. Not to mention all the nights you three spend in his room.” She glances at Gabriel, “Or the—ahem— ‘alone time’ you spend with Castiel while you two groom your wings.”

They both blush furiously and look away.

Jessica smiles. “Anyways, people in Portland have been dying out of their assigned times, because apparently someone has become powerful enough to do that.” She looks pointedly at Sam.

“Rowena?” he asks.

She nods. “So, I’ve been instructed to offer my assistance as a resource.”

“Wait,” Gabriel says, “you said people. As in more than one.”

“Four, so far.”

They sigh. “Yeah, okay, well, uh, we’re handling it,” Sam says.

“But if you need anything—”

“We don’t, and we won’t,” Gabriel interjects. “I’m more powerful than one of Death’s ‘Angels’.”

She glares at him. “We’ll see about that.”

Sam and Gabriel start as she disappears.

“Okay,” Sam says. “That’s not good.”

“No, no it’s not,” Gabriel says, a shell-shocked look on his face. “I didn’t even know she was there. Cassy must not have either, else he would’ve said something.”

“It’s alright, Gabe. Right now, I think we should focus on Rowena.”

Gabriel nods. “Yeah. I think that sounds good,” he says, getting back in the car.

-

When Sam and Gabriel finally pull into Portland, it’s just a little after midnight and Sam’s bone tired. He quickly finds the nearest motel and pulls in, stumbling out of the car and to the check in place.

“One room, king bed,” he says tiredly.

Gabriel’s eyes widen in surprise.

The man behind the counter hands over a key, not looking up from his magazine.

Sam nods his thanks and trudges outside, Gabriel trying to keep him from falling over. “I’ll get the stuff,” he says, taking the Impala key from Sam.

Sam nods and starts walking to the room.

Gabriel shakes his head and unlocks the trunk, taking out the two duffel bags Sam packed, before closing it and walking after Sam.

When he gets inside, he sees the younger Winchester sprawled on the bed, his face buried in one of the pillows.

Gabriel stands awkwardly in the doorway.

Sam glances at him. “What’re you standin’ there for?”

Gabriel blinks in surprise. “Um . . .” he eyes the single bed.

Sam groans. “Gabe, just get over here,” he says, half-heartedly reaching out an arm.

Gabriel sighs and puts the bags down before walking over and getting in the bed.

Sam pulls him closer and Gabriel flushes.

-

“So, how we playin’ this?” Gabriel asks as they pull up to the art gallery.

“FBI investigating the weird death here.”

Gabriel raises an eyebrow. “Does no one ever get suspicious of your whole “X-Files” routine?”

Sam shrugs. “Sometimes. Our badges are usually enough to fool them.”

“Do I get a badge?” he asks excitedly.

Sam nods, trying to hold a smile back as he hands one to Gabriel. “I took one of Dean’s old ones and used your picture.”

Gabriel narrows his eyes, suspicious of Sam’s expression as he takes the badge. “Great, let’s get goin’,” he says, getting out of the car.

Sam nods and follows him, walking up to the building and walking inside.

Both of them look around in vague disgust at the “art” surrounding them.

“I don’t get you humans,” Gabriel says, shaking his head. “I guess some of this stuff is nice, but you could do so much better.”

Sam chuckles as they walk through the halls, humming under his breath.

Gabriel looks at him out of the corner of his eyes. “Franz Ferdinand?” he asks, amused. “Really?”

Sam shrugs. “Your comment reminded me of one of their songs. They’ve got some good stuff.”

Gabriel rolls his eyes and they walk up to the officer in front of the tape.

Sam opens his mouth to say something, but is cut off by Gabriel. “Special Agents Engel and Teufel. We’re here to check out the body.”

The guy gives them an odd look, but relents after glancing at their badges.

Sam glares at Gabriel as they walk up to the burn marks on the floor. “Why’d you cut me off?” he asks. “I had it handled.”

Gabriel raises an eyebrow. “You think I don’t know what you were planning. Phil Collins and Peter Gabriel.”

Sam glances down guiltily. “It was actually an accident. I didn’t think you’d notice.”

Gabriel rolls his eyes. “I’m more observant than you give me credit for, sasquatch.”

Sam chuckles. “Yeah. What was with those names you used though?”

Gabriel shrugs. “German. Engel is self-explanatory, and teufel means demon, Devil.”

Sam flinches. “Odd names,” he comments.

Gabriel narrows his eyes. “I thought it was funny, the idea of an Angel and a demon solving crimes. I didn’t have much time to come up with something.”

Sam nods, turning to the burn marks. “So, why do you think she did this?”

Gabriel shrugs. He pauses, tilting his head and eying something behind the marks. “See that,” he says, pointing to what looks like a thin layer of ash. “That’s probably why.”

“What is it?”

“A Reaper burned there. That never happens, but I think I heard of a spell once that could do it.”

“Why would she burn a Reaper? That doesn’t really seem like a good idea.”

“I dunno.” He glances away. “Well . . . there is something. The woman, Elizabeth Mahler, she was a part of a company that sold thousands of mislabeled drugs. Lots of people died because of it. Mahler and a few others weren’t punished because their lawyer got them off on a technicality.”

“So, she’s exacting vengeance or something? But why? She doesn’t strike me as the kinda person to care about something like that.”

Gabriel shrugs. “We’ll have to ask her.”

“Yeah. Do you know where she is?”

“Maybe. My Grace is still a little weird, but there’s definitely someone with powerful magic here. I don’t think I could track her down, so we’ll just have to keep tryin’ to call her.”

Sam nods. “I guess that works. Let’s get outta here,” he says, starting to the exit with Gabriel at his heels.

-

“I’m disappointed in you two.”

Sam moves to hit the brakes, but stops at the last second, drawing in a deep breath. “Jessica,” he says evenly. “What do you want?”

“To talk. I figure you’ll be wanting some help right about now.”

“We’re good,” Gabriel grits out.

“Really? Not even if I have a way for you two to defeat Rowena?”

He pauses. “Continue.”

She smiles. “Death keeps a notebook for everyone and how they’re going to die, depending on the choices they make. Your brother’s seen his. However, in Rowena's book, she always dies the same way. She's killed, Sam Winchester, by you.”

There’s a long, uncomfortable silence.

“Just a little tip,” she says before disappearing.

-

“Okay, theories,” Sam says, closing the motel door behind him. “Why’s Rowena killing Reapers?”

Gabriel sighs and crashes on the bed. “Well, there aren’t many reasons. I mean, if there was one Reaper that you specifically didn’t like, I guess revenge. But there’s been more than one death.”

“Yeah,” Sam says, sitting down and taking his boots off. He pauses. “Actually, this reminds me of something Dean told me a while ago. In order for Death to pull me out of the Cage, he needed Dean to do something. So, he had Dean wear his ring and be Death for a day. I think the reason was something about Dean understanding how Fate and stuff worked. He did fine until there was a little girl, and he let her live. Because of that, a nurse was able to go home early and died in a car crash. Tessa explained it was the Butterfly Effect, and how small, seemingly inconsequential things could affect much larger ones down the road.”

Gabriel nods. “That sounds like something Death would do.” A realization suddenly comes to him. “That’s what she’s doing!” He exclaims.

Sam’s head snaps up, surprised. “Uh . . . what’s she doing?”

“Messing with Fate. Causing people to die before they’re supposed to.”

“Why?”

Gabriel pauses. “I . . . don’t know,” he admits.

Sam sighs. “We’ll have to ask her. She hasn’t responded to any of our voicemails, has she?”

“I don’t think so. We can try again if you want.”

Sam shrugs. “Sure. Not like we have any other leads.”

Gabriel nods and takes out his phone, pulling up Rowena’s number.

Sam gets out his laptop and starts looking at guest lists in nearby hotels.

**‘You’ve reached the voicemail of Rowena MacLeod. If you’re the Winchesters and their Angel, leave your reason for disturbing me. Anyone else, never call again.’**

Gabriel sighs. “Hey, Ro, it’s me. Loki. We’d  _ really _ like it if you’d call us back. Like, soon as you can. We’ve got lots to catch up on.” He ends the call.

“Nothing?” Sam asks.

“Nothing,” Gabriel confirms.

Sam sighs. “Well, I’m looking at hotel guest lists. Hopefully we’ll get something.”

“With our luck?” Gabriel says ruefully. “We’d have an easier time getting Cassy and Dean together.”

Sam chuckles. “You might be right about that, but I’m still gonna look.”

Gabriel shrugs. “Have fun,” he says, pulling out a Bible from the nightstand drawer.

-

“Hey, Gabe,” Sam says, turning away from his computer, “How’d you know about Elizabeth and Pirodine Pharmaceuticals?”

The Archangel stiffens, putting the Bible down. “Uh, that. I, um . . . you know how you’ve been letting me use your computer?”

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Well . . . I’ve been looking at articles. Specific articles, actually. Ones about people who did bad things and went unpunished.”

Sam’s eyes widen. “Wait, are you . . . are you considering becoming the Trickster again?”

Gabriel shrugs. “I . . . I don’t know,” he admits. “It’s who I was for the longest time. And now . . . I don’t know who I am. I’m not the Archangel Gabriel, I’m not the Trickster Loki. I’m . . . I’m not anyone.”

Sam gives him a sympathetic look. “You’re your own person. You don’t have to be either of them if you don’t want to.”

“Sam, I don’t know who I am. I’ve been around for a long, long time. For a while, I was the Archangel Gabriel. The youngest of the four, I was also the most down to Earth, so to speak. Then, I ran away after Michael locked Lucifer in the Cage. For a while, I wandered the Earth. Doing whatever I pleased. That’s how I picked up the whole Trickster thing. I’d find people who did bad things and punished them. It wasn’t much different from some of the stuff I’d done as Gabriel, so it didn’t really bother me. I became Loki after some Scandinavians caught me using my powers while they were still establishing their pantheon. It didn’t really affect me, so I just accepted it. Though, the pagan powers were a nice bonus. Now, however, I don’t have anything. I don’t want to leave you and Cassy, and I’ve Fallen too far to reclaim the title of Archangel. I’m lost.”

Sam nods, digesting this new information. “Well, maybe you can figure it all out. With us, me and Cas. We can help you.”

“Thanks, Sam. I like the sound of that.” He pauses. “Y’know . . . I can help you there too.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean that I’d like to help you regain your autonomy. Your agency. I’m sure Castiel would too.”

Sam looks away. “It’s fine.”

Gabriel shakes his head. “No, Sam. It’s not. Too many beings have used you for their own gain. Caused you harm. You don’t deserve that.”

Sam chuckles ruefully. “Yeah.”

“I mean it, Sam. You need to know that you can say no again. That you can think for yourself.”

Sam says nothing.

Gabriel sighs. “If you get to help me, I get to help you. But only if  _ you _ want it.”

Sam blinks in surprise and glances at Gabriel.

“I can’t make you listen to me, but I can ask that you be open to it.”

Sam nods. “Okay,” he says quietly.

Gabriel grins. “That’s the spirit.”

Sam chuckles and shakes his head. His eyes settle on the Bible next to Gabriel and he pauses. “Hey, if you’ve been AWOL since the whole Cage thing, what about Mary and Jesus?”

Gabriel glances at the Bible and he bursts into laughter. “Oh, that’s a funny story,” he says, wiping tears from the corners of his eyes. “Y’see, Mary—”

He’s cut off when his phone starts ringing. Gabriel quickly picks it up and answers the call.

“Hello?”

**‘Loki, how lovely to hear from you.’**

‘Rowena,’ Gabriel mouths to Sam, putting the phone on speaker. “Hey there Ro. How’s it goin’?”

**‘I can’t complain. Now, why is it you keep calling me?’**

“You know why.”

**‘Oh, do I now? And exactly how forthcoming have you been with that information?’**

“I thought it was obvious. Did you really think we wouldn’t find out what you’ve been doing?”

There’s a pause.  **‘Well, a girl can dream. I guess now is when you tell me to stop.’**

“Something like that. Or, you could say why you’re doing this.”

**‘And why should I tell you that?’**

“So me ‘nd Sam can decide whether to leave you alone or stop you.”

**‘I think my answer would disappoint you there. How about we meet, just the three of us. I’ll tell you why, so long as you two call a temporary truce.’**

Gabriel glances at Sam, who nods. “Fine. Just tell us where, and we’ll be there.”

**‘The Hotel DeLuxe. I’ll be waiting.’**

The call ends and Gabriel puts his phone down. “So, I think that went well.”

“Better than I was expecting,” Sam admits. “When’re we leaving?”

“I recommend now. Rowena’s moods can change as quick as the oceans’, so it’s best to catch her while she’s in a good one.”

Sam nods. “Then let’s get going,” he says, starting to put his boots back on.

-

Sam and Gabriel glance around awkwardly, trying to find Rowena in the sea of people at the bar area. Gabriel spots her a few feet away, waving at them and nudges Sam. They cautiously walk over, sitting in the seats across from her. Gabriel glances nervously at the big man standing protectively behind Rowena’s chair.

Rowena smirks. “Oh, I wouldn’t worry about him, Loki. Just a little added protection, since I’m guessing Sam here has his witch-killing bullets handy.”

They shift uncomfortably in their seats and she lets out a laugh.

“That’s what I thought. Now, down to the reason you wanted to meet with me.”

“You’re messing with Fate,” Sam says. “We wanna know why.”

Rowena sighs and glances at Gabriel, her eyes widening slightly. The expression quickly becomes impassive. “Well, you’re partially right there, Samuel. I am messing with Fate, but only so I can get Death’s attention. He has something I want.”

“What could you possibly want from Death?” Gabriel asks.

Rowena pauses, looking at the floor. “My son,” she says quietly.

Sam and Gabriel blink in surprise. “Wait . . . as in Crowley?” Gabriel asks.

She nods. “Yes. After his death, I had an unexpected reaction. We’d never really had the best relationship, but he didn’t deserve that.”

“Rowena . . .” Sam trails off uncomfortably. “Crowley sacrificed himself. To keep Lucifer in the alternate dimension.”

“And how well did that turn out?” she asks ruefully. “He found a way back, like he always does.”

Sam flinches and Gabriel sighs.

“Anyways, it would be best if you two leave this alone. This is between me and Death.”

“We can’t do that, Ro,” Gabriel says. “Sorry to say, but I’m not on your side this time. We can’t keep letting you kill people.”

Rowena scoffs. “You’re one to talk, Loki. I’d’ve thought you’d like this sort of thing. It’s not exactly just desserts, but I’m certainly not as creative as you. These are not good people.”

Gabriel scratches the back of his head. “Yeah, I know. But, I’ve . . . changed.” He glances at Sam. “I think. And we can’t let this go.”

She sighs. “I was afraid of that. I guess one can’t get what they want all the time. But how is it you plan on stopping me?”

They glance at each other uncomfortably. “Well . . .” Gabriel starts. “According to Death, Sam’s the only one who can kill you. Like, forever.”

She gives them an odd look. “And barring that? How do you plan on keeping me down?”

Sam takes out a pair of magic-binding handcuffs. “With these,” he says, reaching them forward. To their surprise, it goes right through her.

“Hope you don’t mind the astral projection,” she says, before disappearing.

They glance up and see the big man walking out a door with Rowena in front of him.

“There,” Sam says, quickly getting up and going after them, Gabriel on his heels.

They run through the hallways until Gabriel gets stopped by the man. He glances at where Sam ran ahead before looking back to the man. “Raspberries,” he mutters, preparing to fight.

-

“Rowena, stop,” Sam says loudly, cocking his gun as he points her.

She stops. “Sam . . .” she starts. “Let me go.”

“I can’t do that.”

“What if it were Dean in my son’s place, you’d go to the ends of the Earth to save him!”

Sam glances down. “No, I wouldn’t,” he admits.

Rowena turns around, raising her head. “Well, then you’ll just have to kill me.”

Sam doesn’t look at her, closing his eyes. After a few seconds, he starts lowering his gun.

Rowena lets out a sharp breath.

Then, almost before she has time to react, he opens his eyes and fires. She quickly raises her hand, stopping the bullet inches from her hand.

Sam gasps in shock. “H-how did you . . .”

“You really would’ve shot me,” Rowena says in disbelief. She glances away before vanishing, reappearing next to Sam. “Somnia.”

His eyes start feeling heavy and he collapses to the alley floor.

-

When he finally comes to, Sam realizes he’s bound to a chair. By some kind of magic, because he couldn’t see any physical restraints. He sees Rowena working on something in front of him.

“You don’t have to do this.”

She pauses. “Yes I do, Samuel.”

“Crowley made his own decisions, it wasn’t your fault.”

“Yes, it was!” she exclaims. “I could've stopped it.” Rowena picks up a knife and uses it to cut her palm. Then, she picks up a vial of purple liquid.

“What’s that?”

She doesn’t respond and pours it on the cut. “It won’t matter in a few minutes,” she says, walking over to him. “I know how to get Death here.”

“How?” Sam asks warily.

“By killing you. If there's no one to stop me, then he’ll have to come.”

“Rowena, don’t do this,” Sam pleads.

“I’m sorry, Sam. But I must.” She rips open his flannel and places her bleeding palm over his heart.

Sam lets out a scream as pain courses through him. His world narrows to the burning creeping through his chest. After a few seconds, it stops.

He hears the sound of muffled conversation and tries to make out the scene in front of him.

There were two blobs standing in front of him, presumably Rowena and someone else talking together. His senses start coming back and he makes out a bit of the conversation.

“. . . go ahead,” someone says. Rowena turns to Sam. “I’m curious to see what happens.”

Sam notices the knife in her hand as she approaches him. “No,” he says, his voice strained. “No, no. Rowena. I know what you went through and I know how much you lost and I realize how much you want your family back. But don’t do it, not like this. This is  _ not _ you. Not anymore.”

“What happened to me, those were my choices,” Rowena says. “But Fergus never . . . it wasn’t fair.” She turns to the other person. “It’s not fair!” she shouts, flinging her hands forward and shooting out purple lightning.

The force of the spell sending him tumbling backwards in the chair.

Rowena collapses and Sam recognizes who was in front of her.

“You were never gonna kill him,” Billie says. “There was a time you would’ve, but not now.” She steps forward and stoops down. “I can see that.”

“I don’t know what I’m doing,” Rowena sobs.

“Sometimes, life is unfair,” Billie says. “And sometimes, we lose things and sometimes we make mistakes. And some of these things can never be fixed no matter how powerful you become. Some things just are, and everyone has to live with that.”

“And now you’ll take me?”

“No.” Billie glances at Sam. “You already know how your story ends.”

A few seconds later, Gabriel bursts into the room. He quickly assesses the scene in front of him and bows respectfully to Billie.

“Death,” he says.

“Gabriel.”

She glances behind him and Jessica walks in.

“It seems this matter has been taken care of,” Billie says.

Jessica nods and they disappear.

Gabriel glances at Sam. “You alright?”

“Yeah,” he says, sitting up. “Are you?” he asks, seeing the wounds on Gabriel’s face.

“I’ll live.” He walks up to Rowena and sits down in front of her. “Hey there Ro.”

“Gabriel,” she says quietly. “I should’ve known.”

The Archangel looks away. “Yeah. Sorry about that.”

“It’s alright, I get it. I figured you weren’t Loki when I saw your wings a little bit ago.”

“Well, I actually am. It’s one of my aliases.”

“Semantics,” she mutters. “What are you gonna do to me?”

“Nothing. So long as you don’t do anything like this again, we’ll leave you alone.”

She chuckles. “I can do that.”

“Good.” He pauses. “What are you gonna do?”

She shrugs. “I dunno. Whatever I want, I guess.”

Gabriel nods. “Well . . . you could come with us.”

She gives him an odd look. “Back to your Bunker? And why would I wanna do that?”

“You don’t have anything else to do. We don’t really either. Plus, we've got some pretty sweet magic items and spell books.”

“Oh!” Sam exclaims. “You’ve gotta help Cas.”

Gabriel snaps his fingers. “That’s what I forgot. Yeah, you’ve gotta help him with that.”

Rowena looks away, staying silent. After a while, she says, “Alright. It’s not like I have anything better to do.”

Gabriel nods triumphantly. “Great. Now, I dunno about you two, but I kinda wanna get outta here.”

“Same,” Sam says, getting up carefully. “See if Cas can get back to the Bunker.”

“I’ll contact him over Angel Radio.”

“Got it.”

Rowena gracefully stands. “I suppose I’ll be riding with you two in that monstrosity of a car, then.”

Sam chuckles. “Yeah. Just don’t say that around Dean when he gets back.”

“Where is he anyways? I’d’ve thought he’d be here to help you two kidnap me.”

Sam looks away. “He’s, uh . . . working on something right now. In another world.”

“Oh,” Rowena says, obviously surprised. “Well, best of luck to him.”

Sam nods. “Yeah,” he says quietly.


	9. Pride Month

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, I'm gonna start this off by saying this is NOT a chapter that carries any weight in the story. It's simply an intermission chapter because my beta hasn't gotten back to me on the next real chapter of this, so I haven't posted it yet. (Sorry about that). But, if there's anyone who'd like to go over it for me, I'd be eternally grateful.
> 
> If I get anything wrong in this, please let me know and I'll change it immediately. This is all just a short, funny chapter I wrote and everything in it is headcannon.

When Sam first saw Gabriel, he was sure he was hallucinating. Castiel on the other hand, seemed utterly nonplussed about his brother’s new attire.

“Mornin’ Samshine,” the Archangel says, walking into the kitchen. He notices Sam’s wide eyes and gives him a confused look. “What? There somethin’ on my face?”

Sam shakes his head. “Uh, what are you wearing?” he asks incredulously.

Gabriel glances down at his bright pink, yellow, and blue shirt. “What?”

Sam vaguely gestures to his clothes.

“Oh, this. It’s June.”

Sam gives him a confused look.

Gabriel’s eyes widen. “You don’t know?”

Sam shakes his head. “Um, know what?”

“It’s only the greatest month ever. Don’t you know what’s being celebrated?”

Sam pauses. “I’m pretty sure you’re not getting this exited for Father’s Day, so no, I don’t know what this is about.”

Gabriel looks at Castiel, a shocked look on his face. “ _Please_ tell me _you_ know what I’m talking about.”

Castiel shrugs. “I don’t typically follow most human traditions. The only thing I’ve noted is that in recent years, a select part of them have begun draping themselves in clothing similar to your own. Although, I’m sure there were other colors and shades as well.”

Gabriel lets out a horrified gasp and Sam’s eyes widen.

“Wait,” the younger Winchester starts, “are you dressed up because of pride month?”

“Of course,” Gabriel says, feeling confused by Sam’s reaction.

Sam glances around. “It’s only us here.”

“I know. So?”

Sam sighs. “Nevermind. Wear whatever you want, I don’t really care.”

Castiel gives them a confused look. “What is this ‘pride month’ you two are talking about?”

Gabriel’s eyes widen. “You don’t know?”

“Considering my reaction earlier, I was sure you were aware.”

“Come with me Cassy, and I shall show you the joys of the month of June.”

Sam watches in vague concern as Gabriel practically drags Castiel back to his room. He shakes his head. “I’ll check on them later,” he says to himself, going back to his coffee.

**. . .**

A few hours later, Castiel emerged from the room. Sam eyes his new shirt. “I guess you’re getting into the spirit too?”

Castiel nods, proudly looking down at his new black, grey, white, and purple clothing. “Yes. Me and Gabriel browsed the internet and found what I best identify as.”

Sam nods. “That’s great.” He studies the colors. “I’m pretty sure that’s the ace flag, right? Or is it demi?”

“Both, actually. I debated for a while between them, but I decided on asexuality.”

“Nice,” he says approvingly, going back to his book.

Castiel gives Sam an odd look. “Do you know your sexuality?”

Sam’s eyes widen and he clears his throat. “Um, y-yeah.”

Castiel smiles. “Wonderful. Would you like to join us in the wearing of colorful clothing?”

“Uh, no, Cas. I-I’m good.”

“Oh. That’s alright, you don’t have to.”

“Thanks, Cas.”

“It’s no problem. What are you working on?”

“ ‘M just reading.”

Castiel nods. “Sounds fun. May I join you?”

“Sure,” Sam says, gesturing to the chair in front of him.

Castiel picks out a book and sits down.

**. . .**

“Are you guys gonna wear those all month?” Sam asks the next day, noticing they still hadn’t changed clothes.

“Why my dear Sasquatch, of course we are,” Gabriel says. “Do you just expect us to walk around in dull clothes like heathens?”

Sam chuckles. “No, I guess not. So long as you two are having fun.”

Castiel nods. “It is a nice feeling to drape myself in the colors of the flag that best identifies how I feel towards other people. Especially considering I was unaware of it until yesterday.”

“Well, then by all means, drape away.”

“I intend to. You may join us at any time you wish.”

Gabriel perks up and Sam flushes.

“Got it, Cas.”

Gabriel grins. “Why Sammy, you’re not hiding something are you?”

Sam gulps. “No. I-it’s nothing.”

“It is not nothing, Sam,” Castiel says. “But you do not have to share with us if you don’t wish to.” He shoots a glare at Gabriel, who shrugs.

“Alright, alright. Jeez, I won’t pry.”

Sam nods. “Yeah, thanks.”

Gabriel smirks. “I’d still like to know, Sammich.”

He glances away, a mildly uncomfortable look on his face.

Castiel hits Gabriel in the shoulder and the Archangel lets out an indignant noise.

**. . .**

“What do you think about blue and purple?” Gabriel asks Sam the next day. “And pink, of course.”

Sam shakes his head. It wasn’t really aimed at the question, but rather the being asking it. He sighs. “Why do you care so much?” he asks tiredly.

Gabriel gets an offended look on his face. “Is it a crime to want to know the most I can about my friend?”

“I guess not. It’s not that important, so I don’t see why you care.”

Gabriel lets out a horrified gasp. “Not important? This is a part of your identity we’re talkin’ here. Unless the topic suddenly shifted and I wasn’t aware.”

“Do you really wanna know?”

“Yes.”

Sam sighs. “Same as you. Unless I’ve got my flag colors mixed up.”

Gabriel grins. “Nice. And here I thought you’d be more like Cassy.”

Sam shrugs, looking mildly uncomfortable. “Well, I’m also demi, so kinda.”

“Even better. If you want some commemorative clothing, just say the word.”

Sam chuckles. “I’ll think about it.”

“Great. Now that that’s settled, I think I’ll go hang out with Rowena.”

Sam gives him an odd look. “You’re not gonna interrogate her either?”

Gabriel gets an offended look on his face. “I was _not_ interrogating you.”

Sam shakes his head. “Whatever. Go have our fun.”

Gabriel grins and walks out of the room.

**. . .**

The next day, Sam sees Rowena wearing a shirt with two different shades of green along with black and white.

**. . .**

A little bit after that, he takes Gabriel’s offer and also gets himself a bright pink, yellow, and blue shirt.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, my beta still hasn't gotten back to me, but I decided to post it anyway because why not.

Gabriel wasn’t sure what to expect when he got back to the Bunker. Castiel sulking in the library was not one of them.

“Hey there, Cassy,” Gabriel says, walking up to him. “What’s got you down?”

“Nothing,” the Angel mumbles, not looking up from his book.

Gabriel rolls his eyes. “Well, guess who’s here?” he asks in a fake excited tone.

“Rowena.”

Gabriel pouts. “You sensed her magic didn’t you.”

“Of course. Why is she here?”

“To help you. The rosary, remember,” he says, gesturing at Castiel’s neck.

The Angel glances down. “Oh, yes. I forgot.”

Gabriel narrows his eyes. “Uh-huh. Anywho, she ‘nd Sam’ll be here in a bit. What’cha readin’?”

“It is not of import.” He glances up. “Hello Rowena, Sam,” he says, nodding to them as they walk in.

“Castiel,” Rowena says, sauntering up to him. “I hear you’ve got a wee little problem with a rosary. I’d wager the story behind that is rather entertaining.”

“Not particularly. Can you get it off?”

She eyes it carefully. “Well, it looks simple enough. Just your garden variety cursed object. Give me a few minutes and I should have it.”

Castiel nods gratefully. “Thank you.”

“It’s no big deal.” She glances at Sam. “Although, I will be needing a few things.”

He nods. “Cas can show you where we keep everything.”

Sighing heavily, Castiel puts his book down and gets up, Rowena following as they walk away.

Sam watches them in confusion. “What’s up with Cas? He’s not usually so . . .”

“Uptight? Prissy?” Gabriel supplies.

“Something like that. Do you know?”

Gabriel shrugs. “Nope. Although, I’d wager it had something to do with things in Heaven. I’ll ask him about it later.”

Sam nods. “Okay. Let’s just hope Rowena can help him.”

“She can. Though, I hope Cassy keeps a close eye on her. Leaving her unwatched in one of the artifact rooms is not something I’d recommend.”

Sam raises an eyebrow. “And who was the one to invite her over here?”

Gabriel holds his hands up. “Hey, in my defense I’d just got the shit beat outta me. Obviously, my thinking was impaired.”

Sam rolls his eyes. “Sure. Whatever helps you sleep at night.”

“Well, Angels don’t need to sleep, so ha,” Gabriel says petulantly.

“And yet, you and Cas still stay in my room every night,” Sam says smugly.

Gabriel pauses, glancing away. “That’s just because we’re keeping your nightmares at bay.”

“I think you’re forgetting that it started after _all_ of us had nightmares the same night.”

Gabriel opens his mouth to say something, but stops. “Well . . .” he trails off. “You’re . . . freakishly tall.”

Sam blinks. “And what does that have to do with anything?”

Gabriel pauses. _“Red herring.”_ He mutters. _“But it’s still annoying being the most powerful being in the room, but not taken seriously.”_

Sam raises an eyebrow. “And who says you’re not?”

Gabriel pauses, staring at Sam with something akin to horror in his gaze. “I—I didn’t say anything.” He tilts his head to the side. “Oh, would you hear that, I think Cassy’s calling me.”

The next second, he’s gone with the sound of wings unfurling.

Sam shakes his head and walks back to his room.

-

Later that night, they all lie awake. This was weird for several reasons, but the cause was Castiel. He was excuding some sort of . . . aura. It was uncomfortable for both Sam and Gabriel, and they wanted it to stop so they could just get some friggin’ sleep.

“So, Cas,” Sam starts. “How’d things go up in Heaven?”

Castiel stiffens. “Fine,” he says with feinted nonchalance.

Gabriel groans. “Okay, just tell us what’s goin’ on, Cassy.”

“Nothing is going on.”

“I am not above digging through your thoughts for my answer.”

Castiel pauses. “You wouldn’t.”

“I would. Spit it out.”

Castiel sighs. “It’s my fault.”

Gabriel and Sam glance at each other. “Uh, what’s your fault?” Sam asks.

“The Angels,” Castiel says. “They . . . let’s just say there’s not a lot left.”

Gabriel draws in a sharp breath. “How bad we talkin’ Cassy?”

He shrugs. “Ten-ish. Twelve if you include us.”

“Why’s that your fault, Cas?” Sam asks.

Castiel looks away, closing his eyes. “I . . . I killed them all,” he whispers.

Gabriel bites his lip. “That wasn’t you, Castiel.”

“But it was. I was driven mad by power. Not to mention the Fall.”

“That was Metatron.”

“No,” Castiel says, shaking his head. “He wouldn’t have been able to do it without me—he used my Grace.”

“He manipulated you.”

“I should’ve seen through it.”

“But you didn’t. And that doesn’t make it your fault.”

Castiel says nothing.

Gabriel sighs. “Castiel, you can’t blame yourself for that. You didn’t know what you were doing.”

“But I did.”

“You’d never known free will before. You can’t have expected to get the hang of it after only a few years. Especially considering everything before then.”

“He’s right, Cas,” Sam says. “I’m still not good at it, and I’ve had it all my life.”

Castiel nods. “I . . . I can never forgive myself. But I can try and make it right.”

Sam and Gabriel grin. “Great,” the Archangel says. “Now, can we please get some sleep?”

“I thought Angels didn’t need sleep,” Sam says innocently.

Gabriel freezes.

“We don’t need it, but it is refreshing,” Castiel says, oblivious to Gabriel’s reaction. “And it’s technically not sleep. More of a . . . stasis.”

Sam gives them an odd look. “Whatever, it’s too late for this,” he mumbles, closing his eyes.

-

“Do _any_ of you even know the kind of power you have in this place?” Rowena asks, waltzing into the library. Seeing the looks on their faces, she quickly says, “Not that I do, by any means. But I just so happened to be passing one of your artifact rooms and, for investigative purposes only, I decided to venture in.”

Gabriel narrows his eyes. “And what, pray tell, is it you found.”

“Oh, nothing much,” she says with feinted nonchalance, sitting down next to Castiel. “But there was an entire shelf of potions. All labeled to the extreme, of course. And there were also these _gorgeous_ spell books I found in this old trunk. One of them even had a little key imbedded in the spine, which gave it such a nice look. Oh, and not a few feet away were these dreamcatchers—”

“Wait,” Castiel says, interrupting her, “did you say there was a key in the spine of one of these books?”

“Yes, but getting back to those dreamcatchers—”

“Can you show me it?”

She stops, looking confused. “Sure, I guess. Dunno why you’d wanna see it, but alright.”

Castiel glances at Sam. The younger Winchester nods and leaves the room. Rowena gives Castiel an odd look and takes him back to the artifact room.

Gabriel shakes his head and goes back to reading his book.

-

A minute later, Sam walks back to the library, a long wooden box in his hands. Gabriel vaguely recognizes it from a few weeks ago.

“You think Rowena found the key?” he asks.

Sam shrugs, sitting across from him. “Maybe. It can’t hurt to try.”

“I guess not. What do you think’s in there?”

“Not a clue.”

“Then let’s find out,” Castiel says, walking into the library with Rowena close behind.

They sit down and Sam slides the box over. Castiel presses the button on the side and takes out the key, putting it in the keyhole and turning. There’s a click and Castiel carefully takes the lid off.

They gasp when they see what’s inside.

A feather, about ten inches long, rested in a bed of paper shavings. It had a blue stripe running along its golden shaft, except the tip, which was also gold.

Gabriel draws in a sharp breath. It couldn’t be . . .

Castiel glances at Gabriel out of the corner of his eyes.

“What is it?” Sam asks.

“An Angel feather,” Castiel replies.

“Do you know whose?”

“It’s not mine.” He looks at Gabriel.

“Not mine either,” the Archangel says quickly.

Castiel narrows his eyes.

“I mean it, Cassy,” he says forcefully.

Castiel holds his hands up and looks back at the feather. “It’s probably one of Michael’s. How the Men of Letters got it, I have no idea.”

“He probably missed one after he molted and it fell to Earth,” Gabriel says. “It’s happened before.”

“Perhaps.” He glances at Sam. “If you could find a secure location to put this, that would be great.”

Sam nods and gingerly takes the box.

“Well,” Rowena says, standing up. “Now that that mystery’s solved, I think I’ll go back to the arti—I mean the kitchen. Since I suddenly find myself quite famished.

Gabriel sighs as she walks away. “We’re gonna have to make sure she doesn’t take anything before she leaves.”

“That might be difficult, brother,” Castiel says.

“You’re probably right there,” he admits.

-

Later that night, Sam grabbed the only reliable book on Angel wings he knew of (verified by Castiel himself), the feather, and a bag of Veggie Straws. He knew they weren’t really that good for him, but it made him feel better than a bag of chips. They were his go-to snack when he was researching something. In this case, an Angel feather.

Sam glances up when Gabriel walks up and sits across from him.

“What’cha workin’ on, Sasquatch?” he asks, eyeing the stuff in front of Sam.

“I’m doing a little more research on the feather.”

Gabriel freezes. “You, uh, find anything interesting?” he asks carefully.

“Actually, yeah. Cas once explained to me how Angels identified themselves by the markings on their feathers, but it’s been a while. So, I got a book that explains them.”

“Nice.”

“I thought so. You probably already know this, but the blue stripe means garrison leader. Although, I’ve read that it’s pretty much applied to any leadership role. The gold tip and shaft mean that the feather belongs to an Archangel, so I see why Cas thought it was Michael’s.

“Yeah, that’s pretty much it.”

“What I don’t get is why it couldn’t be one of Raphael’s feathers. You said it wasn’t yours, and I know what Lucifer’s look like.”

Gabriel looks away uncomfortably. “Raphy was the Archangel of healing. He lead the Rit Zien, which means he always had a purple stripe along with his blue one.”

Sam looks back at the book. “Oh, yeah. I didn’t think of that.”

“ ‘S alright.” He looks back at the feather and sighs. “Sam . . . that’s not Michaels.”

“What do you mean?”

Gabriel glances away. “It’s mine.”

Sam’s eyes widen.

“From back when I lived in heaven.”

“How did the Men of Letters get it?”

“Well . . . after molt, Angels are supposed to burn their feathers. It’s too dangerous if they get to Earth. I left Heaven right after molt, but I kept all my feathers. It was mostly a nostalgic thing, I couldn’t bear to part with them. Over the years, I either burned them or used them in spells. Eventually I only had one left.” He gestures to the box.

“So you gave it to them for safekeeping?”

Gabriel gets an uncomfortable look on his face. “Not exactly. None of them knew my true identity. They all thought of me as Loki. We had a little game, they’d capture me, I’d escape. One time, I found out they were writing a book about Angels. Originally, I planned to barter information for my freedom, but give them hilarious lies instead of the truth. However, when the time came, I couldn’t bring myself to do it.”

“Wait, did you help write this?” Sam asks, gesturing to the book in front of him.

“That and two others. Look back in references and you should see Loki, Norse Trickster god. After they let me go, one of them sought me out. He managed to figure out who I was and wanted to draw my wings for the book. I refused at first, but he eventually wore me down. Afterwards, I gave him the feather. All that talk about Heaven and Angels made me realize why I left. I decided I didn’t need a reminder anymore.”

Sam nods, digesting the new information. “I’m guessing you don’t want it back then.”

“No. I’ve long since made my peace with what I did.”

“What do you want me to do with it?”

Gabriel shrugs. “Keep it. After that, I don’t care.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah. I trust you, Sam.”

Sam chuckles. “A horrible decision, really.”

Gabriel rolls his eyes. “Whatever. I’m gonna go to bed. You comin’?”

“Uh, yeah. Just give me a few minutes.”

“Got it,” Gabriel says, getting up and walking back to Sam’s room.

When he gets there, he sees Castiel already lying on the bed.

“Hey there, Cassy,” he says, getting in with him.

“Gabriel. I see you and Sam had a nice talk.”

Gabriel curses. “Stupid Angel hearing,” he mutters.

“Yes. I’m glad you opened up to him. Although, I must admit I am hurt.”

Gabriel glances at him. “You don’t look to broken up to me.”

“Touché.”

Gabriel sighs and closes his eyes. “I don’t know why I told him.”

“Because you trust him.”

“Well, yeah.”

“Not to mention you ‘have feelings’ for him,” Castiel says, smirking.

Gabriel glares at him. “I really don’t appreciate your tone, Castiel.”

“Was it to condescending for you, brother?”

Gabriel pouts. “You’re no fair.”

“Life’s not fair.”

Gabriel groans. “You should stop listening to the things humans say. They’re a bad influence. Especially those Winchesters.”

“I’ll keep that in mind. But it’s true.”

“I know that, Cassy. Doesn’t mean everything they say is.”

“I will concede to that. However, I think you will agree that love is indeed blind.”

Gabriel pauses. “Okay, I didn’t say all of them were wrong.”

“It was implied. So, you admit that it is true?”

Gabriel glares at him. “I admit . . . nothing.”

“You told Sam the truth. That shows a certain degree of trust. And more, of course.”

“Castiel, you are not one to talk. Need I mention a certain green-eyed hunter?”

Castiel looks away.

“That’s what I thought. Funny how quickly these things can be turned around.”

“That in no way takes away from the truth. You care about him.”

“He’s . . . nice. Kind. I haven’t known anyone like that in a long time. It’s a nice reprieve from everything in my past. These past two months with you guys . . . it’s the best I’ve known in a while.”

“There is another saying humans have. Something like, all that pain and suffering just made them kinder. I find that it applies to Sam.”

“I agree with that. He’s just . . . probably the best person I’ve known. Not that I’ve known a lot of good people, of course.”

“As expected. I have to agree with you there, though.”

“Yeah.” Gabriel pauses. “Castiel . . . I’m afraid.”

“I understand. Don’t be. It gets easier, I promise.”

“That’s not exactly comforting.”

“I know. But it’s all you have.”

-

Sam blinks in surprise when he sees Rowena. “You actually went to the kitchen,” he says incredulously.

She shrugs. “I’m not a thief, Samuel. Frankly, I’m appalled you’d even think it.”

“Well, you don’t have the best track record.”

“True. What were you doing?”

“More research on that feather.”

“Oh, what did you find.”

Sam pauses, looking away uncomfortably. “Oh, y’know. Just what Cas said.”

She raises an eyebrow. “So, that feather wasn’t Gabriel’s after all.”

Sam freezes. “No . . .” he says unconvincingly. “Why—why would you say that?”

She gives him a look. “You two weren’t exactly quiet. Plus, I have good hearing.”

“Oh.”

“Yes. But, the one thing I’m curious about is the way you act around him. And, the way he acts around you.”

Sam looks away. “It—it’s nothing.”

“You’re a horrible liar, Samuel. Something happened between you two.”

“Yeah . . .” Sam trails off. “He, uh . . . he told me he had feelings. For me.”

“Ah. And you return those feelings, yes?”

“I—I’m not sure.”

“Well, I think that answer tells you everything you need to know.”

“What do you mean by that?”

“I mean that you’ve considered it. And when you did, the answer wasn’t no.”

Sam looks at the floor.

“I thought so. You should tell him. From what I understand, you’ve both been through a lot. It would be good if you could find some happiness with each other.”

Sam nods. “I don’t know if I can.”

“You should at least try. Start out small, ask him on a date. I’ll even help you set it up.”

Sam narrows his eyes. “You’re being oddly helpful.”

“Why Sam, what kind of person do you think I am? I can be helpful if I want. In this case, you’ve helped me. And now I’m returning the favor.”

Sam nods. “Thanks, Rowena. I really appreciate it.”

“Anytime, Samuel. Now, I think it’s getting a bit late for you. The Angels are waiting.”

Sam looks away, a slight blush on his face. “I, uh, yeah. See you in the morning,” he says, starting to walk out.

“Goodnight, Sam.”

“Uh, ‘night, Rowena.”


	11. Chapter 11

“Oh no,” Gabriel murmurs, horrified by what was on the laptop screen.

“What is it?” Sam asks, glancing up at him.

“It’s . . . I—I’m not sure. It looks like an Angel went crazy and killed a bunch of people.”

“Are you sure?”

“Uh, yeah. Everyone was smote, eyes burned out, the whole nine.”

“Cas said there weren’t that many left. Do you know who?”

“No, but they would have to be pretty powerful. Actually . . .” Gabriel trails off, eyes widening.

“What?”

“Is, um . . . are there any Archangels left besides me?”

“No. Cas exploded Raphael and Michael’s in the Cage.”

“What about Lucifer?”

Sam flinches. “He’s, uh . . . we actually don’t know.”

Gabriel nods. “Well, I found him.”

“Wait . . . did he do that?”

“Well, it was an Archangel, and I didn’t do it. Unless Raphy or Mike are back.”

“No. What’re we gonna do?”

Gabriel shrugs. “Capture him, kill him, something. What do you wanna do?”

Sam pauses, looking away. “I . . . I’d like him dead,” he says quietly.

Gabriel nods. “I think that’s best. Do you know where Castiel is?”

“Uh, I think he’s in Heaven. He’s been going there every so often.”

“Got it,” Gabriel says, closing his eyes and tapping into Angel Radio.

_“Testing testing, one, two, three.”_

_“Gabriel?”_

_“Hey, Cassy. How’s it goin’?”_

_“Dull.”_

_“I suspected. Well, Luci’s back and we need your help.”_

_“Gabriel?”_ A different Angel asks incredulously.

Gabriel swears and quickly withdraws.

Sam glances at him. “Everything okay?”

“Well, I told Cassy about Lucifer. I may have also alerted Heaven that I’m still alive.”

Sam sighs. “Is that good or bad?”

“A little bit of both. I probably should’ve tapped into Cassy’s private prayer line, but that takes more effort and I didn’t think anyone would hear.”

Sam raises an eyebrow. “Wait, does Angel Radio actually work like a radio?”

Gabriel pauses, an uncomfortable look on his face. “Kinda. It’s a little more complicated than that, but there’s a reason the analogy holds.”

Sam nods. “Well, they were gonna find out eventually.”

“Yeah, I guess.”

_“Gabriel!”_

The Archangel starts, jumping in his seat.

Sam gives him an odd look and Gabriel shakes his head.

_“Cassy, how nice to hear from you. Why are you on my channel. Actually,_ how _are you on my channel? Didn’t Heaven close it?”_

_“No, you simply blocked it out. Naomi has been pestering me about your sudden appearance.”_

_“Yeah, sorry about that. I didn’t think anyone would hear.”_

_“Are you and Sam presently in danger.”_

_“No.”_

_“Then why could this not wait until I got back?”_

_“Because Lucifer killed a bunch of people.”_

There’s a pause and the line goes dead. Gabriel rolls his eyes and lets out a sigh.

“You okay?” Sam asks.

“Yeah. Castiel just contacted me. I’m not sure if he’s coming or not though. He dropped the connection.”

“Well, how much longer do you think he’ll be there?”

“Depends, when did he leave.”

“Yesterday at lunch.”

Gabriel glances at the clock. “Damn, surprised he’s not back already.”

“He’s only been gone a day.”

“Exactly. Our family isn’t the kind you wanna stay around for more than a few hours.”

Sam nods. “Well, he says he has to. I’m not sure why though.”

“Well, Heaven’s run by Angels. Quite literally, actually. Our Grace is what powers it and keeps it going.”

“Oh. And since there aren’t that many left, I’m guessing something bad is happening.”

“Yep. It’s kinda like a battery running low on power. Except when this battery runs out, all of the souls in Heaven will be released and wreak havoc on the Earth.”

Sam blinks. “That—that doesn’t sound good.”

“Nope. Cassy actually asked me to go up there a few days ago. I said no. He’s not to happy with me for that, but I don’t wanna see any of the other Angels. I don’t get the feeling it would end to well.”

Sam nods. “That makes sense. But you might wanna consider it. I don’t fancy hunting ghosts for the rest of my life.”

“Yeah, I know. I’m just gonna need some time.”

“Understandable. So, is Cas coming here, or is he staying up Heaven.”

“Dunno. But I’m still not sure how he stands it up there.”

 “I ‘stand it’ because I have to,” Castiel says, appearing behind Gabriel.

“Doesn’t make it any less boring. Anything interesting happen?”

“Well, for the past few minutes I’ve been fielding questions about why you’re not helping us. And Ash was making trouble again.”

“Sounds fun. Anyways, Luci killed a bunch of people and we need to take care of him.”

“How?”

Gabriel glances at Sam. “We were thinking of killing him.”

“Kill?”

“Yeah, Cassy. Kill. What do you think we should do?”

Castiel shrugs. “Capture him. He might prove useful in the future.”

Sam looks away and Gabriel narrows his eyes. “Wouldn’t it be better if we didn’t have to worry about him at all?”

“I see your point, but we can use him. Archangel Grace is a useful spell ingredient.”

“You could always use mine.”

“Not every time.”

“Cas,” Sam starts. “We can’t do that.”

“Why not?”

“He’ll get out—he _always_ gets out. Besides, how would we even catch him? The Angel-Cuffs wouldn’t work, and the dungeon wasn’t made to keep an Archangel.”

“We’ll figure that out. He’s our responsibility.”

Sam shakes his head. “No, Cas. He’s _your_ responsibility. I’m not the one that said yes and let him out of the Cage.”

“You know what I mean. He can be useful, Sam.”

“For how long? A week, a month? He’ll break out of anything we put him in.”

“You don’t know that.”

“Yes, I do. It’s what he does, Cas.”

“Not if we’re careful.”

“We’re always careful!” Sam exclaims. “And it never changes.” He takes in a deep breath. “Just . . . I don’t know. I can’t deal with this right now,” he mutters, getting up and walking away.

Gabriel glares at Castiel. “Really?”

“I don’t see the problem, brother.”

“The problem is that Sam doesn’t want the being that tortured him for hundreds of years living in the same place as him. Hell, existing at all. Would you want Metatron here? No more than I’d want Asmodeus.”

Castiel pauses, glancing away. “I . . . I didn’t consider everything.”

“I should think not. If you could work on finding Lucifer, that’d be great. I’m-a go talk to Sam.”

Castiel nods and takes the laptop as Gabriel walks to Sam’s room. He cautiously knocks. “Sam, it’s me.”

It’s silent for a few seconds before, “Come in.”

Gabriel opens the door and steps inside, seeing Sam on the bed with his head in his hands. He sits down next to him.

“You okay?”

Sam sighs. “Yeah. It’s just . . .” He pauses, wincing and clutching his head.

“What is it?”

“Cas is right, I—I don’t know what I was thinking.”

Gabriel narrows his eyes. “Sam, what makes you say that?” he asks carefully.

“I just realized I was wrong.” He winces.

Gabriel pauses, worried. “Sam, will you give me permission to look at your thoughts?”

Fear flashes in Sam’s eyes. “Why?”

“You can’t get out what you need to say. Let me pick that out for you.”

Sam looks away. “Okay,” he says quietly.

Gabriel nods and carefully reaches out to Sam’s mind. The next second, he’s assaulted by loud voices.

**“Castiel went through the same as you and he’s just fine!”** one shouts.

“The Cage, he wasn’t there,” a different one pleads.

**“Dean went to Hell! He doesn’t use it to justify sabotaging plans to help everyone!”**

“I . . .”

**“See? Even you can’t reason out of this one. Typical.”**

“Stop, please. Just . . . be quiet.”

**“You _need_ me! I get you back on track!”**

_“Enough!”_ Gabriel’s voice cuts through the noise. He withdraws and Sam watches him with apprehension.

Gabriel’s expression softens and he takes Sam’s hands. “I’m so sorry. You should’ve said something.”

Sam winces. “Y-yeah. I’ve . . . I’ve never told anyone. Besides, it’s alright.”

Gabriel shakes his head. “No. We _don’t_ need Lucifer. If anything, we can steal his Grace before we kill him.”

“But if we capture him, then we have unlimited Grace.”

“No. Like you said, he’ll find a way out. And anyways, you have me. Plus, Archangel Grace isn’t that common of a spell ingredient.”

Sam looks away.

“I’ll talk to Cassy about it. You good?”

Sam nods. “Yeah, I think so.”

“You need me to stay?”

Sam winces. “No, I’m good.”

Gabriel gives him a sympathetic look. “Okay. I’ll be right back,” he says, getting up and walking back out to the library.

Castiel glances at him. “How’d it go?”

Gabriel takes in a deep breath. “You’re wrong. We don’t need Lucifer.”

Castiel nods. “I understand Sam has been through a great deal at his hand, but he could prove useful.”

Gabriel shakes his head. “Sam’s right. He’ll get out of whatever we put him in. How about we steal his Grace instead? Before we kill him.”

Castiel pauses, considering the information. “That is agreeable. Is Sam alright? I did not mean to upset him.”

Gabriel glances away. “He’s . . . processing some things. Just give him a bit.”

Castiel nods and Gabriel walks back to Sam’s room.

Sam glances up when he walks in. “Hey.”

“Hey. Cassy rescinded his idea.”

Sam nods. “Thanks.”

“ ‘Welcome,” Gabriel says, lying down next to him.

Sam glances at him, taking in a deep breath. “Gabe, we need to talk.”

Gabriel raises an eyebrow. “Why do I feel like I’m about to get dumped, even though we’re not even dating?”

Sam chuckles nervously and scratches the back of his head. “Yeah, about that . . .”

“Have we been dating and I didn’t know?” Gabriel asks, eyes widening. “Oh, come on.”

“No. No, it’s not that.”

“Then what?”

Sam pauses. “Well . . . would you . . . like to date?” he asks haltingly. “Me, I mean?”

Gabriel gives him an incredulous look. “Are you asking me out?”

Sam flushes. “No . . . yes . . . I don’t know.”

Gabriel raises an eyebrow. “May I ask what brought on this sudden burst of feelings?”

Sam looks away. “It wasn’t sudden,” he mutters.

“Oh, do tell?”

“I . . . well, after you confessed, I started thinking about it. Actually, it was more me remembering that first time we met, at the college.”

“Ha!” Gabriel exclaims. “I knew it! Eris owes me twenty bucks.”

Sam gives him an odd look. “Uh . . . anyways, you’re one of the only people who I feel I can really talk to. I . . . I trust you. Maybe even more than myself at this point.”

Gabriel nods. “So, you _are_ asking me out?”

Sam looks away, blushing. “Yeah, I guess.”

Gabriel grins. “Great.”

Sam blinks. “ ‘Great’? That’s it?”

Gabriel shrugs. “I dunno what you want from me. I’ve already confessed. This was your time to shine, sasquatch.”

“Don’t call me that.”

“Alright, Sammy.”

Sam rolls his eyes.

“So, if we’re dating now, does that mean I get to kiss you?”

Sam gives him a look.

Gabriel shrugs. “It’s a valid question.”

Sam sighs. “Yes, Gabe. Just no funny business.”

Gabriel grins. “Is the princess Samantha worried I might steal her virtue?” he teases.

Sam groans and pulls a pillow over his face, trying to cover his blush. “I’m almost regretting saying anything,” he says, his words muffled by the pillow.

“Almost,” Gabriel points out. “Which means you don’t.”

“Doesn’t mean I’m not reconsidering.”

Gabriel pouts. “Sammich, you wound me.”

“Good.”

Gabriel lightly tugs at the pillow.

“What?” Sam asks, moving it.

Gabriel grins lasciviously. “I was promised a kiss.”

Sam rolls his eyes and turns to Gabriel, an unamused expression on his face. “No. I don’t like you right now.”

Gabriel pouts.

“Besides, we need to find Lucifer.”

“And yet, you’re still here.”

Sam rolls his eyes and presses a chaste kiss against Gabriel’s lips. “That’s all you’re getting,” he says, getting out of the bed.

Gabriel grins and follows him.


	12. Chapter 12

“So, how’s it comin’ Cassy?” Gabriel asks, following Sam into the library.

“Not good,” he says, glaring at the computer.

“What’s wrong?” Sam asks.

“Your laptop. It is thwarting me with its pop-up ads and . . .” Castiel pauses, a look of distaste coming over his face, “ _clickbait_.”

Sam looks away, trying to hide the smile on his face while Gabriel laughs.

“This is not funny.”

Sam nods, clearing his throat and holding a hand over his mouth. “Yeah, Cas. It—it’s not. You need some help?”

“That would be nice. Your human technology continues to baffle me.”

Gabriel shakes his head. “Damn, Cassy. And here I thought you’d adapted better.”

“Nowhere near as good as yourself, but I do well enough.”

Sam gives them an odd look. “How about you just let me do the searching.”

“I think that is a good idea,” Castiel says, getting up. “In the meanwhile, I think I will see what Rowena is up to.”

“That sounds like a good idea,” Gabriel says. “Me ‘nd Sam’ll look for Luci.”

Castiel nods and walks out of the room.

Sam and Gabriel sit down at the table.

“So, what’re we looking for?” Sam asks.

Gabriel shrugs. “Dunno. Eyes burned out, anything biblical, stuff like that.”

Sam nods and starts typing.

-

Rowena and Castiel walk in a few hours or so later, which makes Sam and Gabriel stop what they were doing and stare at the two of them. This is for the simple reason of the expression on Castiel’s face. _He was smiling_.

Gabriel was upset by this for one reason. _He_ couldn’t make Castiel smile. Which, honestly, wasn’t very surprising given how Angels utilized their Vessels, but that was a whole other thing that he tried not to consider.

Sam, on the other hand, was surprised because Castiel didn’t smile that much. Well, he and Dean didn’t either, but Castiel did it less.

Rowena notices their looks and gets a small, pleased smile on her face.

Gabriel half-heartedly glares at her and subtly makes a rude gesture.

She gets a vaguely appalled look on her face before looking away proudly and delicately sitting down across from him, Castiel next to her.

Sam glances at the two of them, a suspicious look on his face.

Castiel, smile still intact and oblivious to his brother and Rowena’s exchange, looks at Sam. “How’s the search going?”

Sam sighs. “Not well. I’ve been looking, but—”

“Why are you smiling?” Gabriel interrupts, scrutinizing Castiel.

The Angel pauses, a confused look on his face. “I . . . what?”

“Why were you smiling?”

Sam shoots a glare at Gabriel, annoyed.

Rowena’s grin widens and Castiel tilts his head, still confused. “I don’t understand, why is that important?”

Gabriel freezes, realizing he was trapped. After all, he couldn’t just admit that it peeved him he couldn’t make Cassy smile. Especially in front of Sam and Rowena. “Uh . . .” he trails off, trying to find an excuse.

Sam, either in realization of his boyfriend’s plight, or still feeling slighted because of the interruption earlier, clears his throat loudly. “Anyways,” he says, obviously annoyed. “I haven’t been able to find anything. Most of the weird stuff I find is unrelated, or just plain crazy.”

“What have you found so far?” Castiel asks.

“Well, from what I can tell, there’s been an increase of natural disasters. Most of them are explainable, but there’s a few outliers that I can’t make sense of.”

“Like what?” Rowena asks.

Gabriel grins. “Well, that’s a dangerous question. Where do we begin?” he asks considerably, but in a way that makes it seem he already knows the answer. “There was the _huge_ sandstorm in Florida, far from their sandy beaches. Then there’s the inland hurricane that continues to baffle scientists of all merits. Not to mention the earthquake that took Arizona by surprise, and the tornado that ravaged the east coast.”

Castiel blinks and Rowena has the decency to look surprised. “Oh,” they say.

“Yeah,” Sam says. “It’s, uh . . . weird.”

“I’ll say,” Rowena admits.

“The bad thing is, none of the events are concentrated. They’re spread out so much, we can’t tell where Lucifer is. Plus, these all happened days and weeks ago.”

Castiel nods. “Then, I hate to say this, but we’re going to have to wait until he does something else.”

Sam sighs. “Yeah. We don’t really have another choice.”

Rowena glances between the three of them. “Well, that may be so, but we also need a way to defeat him. Unless, of course, you all managed to dig up one of those ever-elusive Archangel Blades.”

They glance away, almost sheepishly.

She blinks, her eyes widening. “You’re not serious, are you?”

Gabriel shrugs.

“That is so unfair!” Rowena exclaims. “I’ve been searching for one for decades, and you lot can just stumble on one by pure luck?”

Gabriel grins. “Sorry, Ro. Guess you witches just can’t match the almighty power of an Angel.”

She glares at him. “It would seem not,” she says coldly. “Anyways, if there’s nothing else to discuss here, I’ve better things to do with my time.” She gets up and starts walking away, but pauses. “When you find him, do let me know. I’d like to accompany you on your little . . . foray into the outside world.”

Sam pauses considerably as she walks away. “Y’know, she’s kinda right. We haven’t been out consistently since . . . well, a while.”

Castiel nods. “We don’t really have to. Besides, there’s people out there.”

Sam and Gabriel nod in agreement.

-

Lucifer glances around the ruins that now surrounded him. Ash and salt was everywhere, choking the air and coating the ground. If he’d been human, he’d be dead. But he wasn’t. He was an Archangel. Practically a god compared to everything else.

Lucifer smiles. He didn’t need Jack. He didn’t need anyone but himself.

-

Early the next morning, Castiel and Gabriel wake violently. They glance at each other, twin looks of horror on their face.

Gabriel glances at Sam. ‘Library, now,’ he signs.

Castiel nods and they carefully extract themselves from the bed before hurrying to the library.

When they get there, they see Rowena lounging on one of the chairs. She glances up at them, an uneasy look in her eyes. “You felt it too?”

“Yeah,” Gabriel says.

“Well, what now?”

Castiel sighs. “We should wake Sam. And check to make sure we’re right.”

Gabriel nods. “I’ll go get him.”

As he walks away, Castiel sits across from Rowena.

There’s silence for a few seconds, before she asks, “Why would he do this? I mean, I’ve no love for humans, but there is a line.”

Castiel shrugs. “He’s always been unpredictable. Even before . . . well, everything.”

Rowena shakes her head and sighs. “I just can’t wait for it to be over.”

Castiel nods. “Yes. But it’s never truly over.”

“I know. But, I’ll have a weight gone.”

“True.”

Gabriel and Sam walk in a minute later.

Sam yawns and sits down in one of the chairs, eyes drooping. “So, what’s goin’ on?”

Castiel, Gabriel, and Rowena glance at each other uneasily.

“It’s Lucifer,” Gabriel says.

Sam pauses before sitting up and rubbing his eyes. “What about him?”

“He’s done something,” Castiel says. “We’re not sure exactly what yet, but it’s bad. There were . . . many deaths.”

Sam closes his eyes and sighs. “Where?” he asks quietly.

“Lincoln, Nebraska,” Gabriel says. “If we leave soon, I think we’ll be able to catch him.” He glances at Rowena. “You still wanna come?”

“Of course. I wouldn’t miss this for the world.”

Gabriel nods. “I’ll be right back, then we can get going.”

Sam sighs as he walks away, placing his head in his hands.

Rowena gives him a sympathetic look and places a hand on his shoulder. “I’ll be over soon. Don’t worry.”

“Not soon enough,” Sam mutters. He lifts his head. “I’m gonna go get dressed,” he says, standing and walking away.

-

Gabriel comes out a few minutes later, Archangel Blade in hand. Sam follows seconds later.

“Everyone ready?” Gabriel asks.

They all nod, and Castiel and Gabriel touch two fingers to Sam and Rowena’s heads, disappearing with the sound of wings unfurling.

The place they reappear is utterly unrecognizable from any sort of human civilization. There was ash and salt on every surface, and the sky was a grey brown color. Sam and Rowena start coughing because of the debris in the air. Gabriel touches two fingers to their foreheads, clearing their lungs and the ambient air.

Sam nods his thanks and glances around. “Do you know where he is?”

“We got as close as we could, but it’s still a bit hard to locate him. Just give us a few seconds.”

Castiel and Gabriel close their eyes, carefully reaching out with their Grace. After a few seconds, they open their eyes and draw back.

Castiel glances at Gabriel. “Me and Sam will approach and distract him, so you and Rowena can sneak up to catch him.”

Gabriel nods and Castiel touches two fingers to Sam’s head, disappearing with the sound of wings unfurling.

When they reappear, Lucifer’s a few yards away. He grins. “Well, if it isn’t the three musketeers.” He pauses. “Speaking of which, where’s your third part? Dean-o just couldn’t be bothered?”

Castiel glares at him. “I’m sure he’d be here if he could.”

“Oh, is ickle Deanie-kins to afraid to show? Pity, I could’ve used a laugh while I killed you.”

“You won’t be killing anyone else,” Sam says. “Not on our watch.”

“Oh, yeah? Big words for a lowly human and his Seraph sidekick.”

“I’m nobody’s sidekick,” Castiel growls.

Lucifer gives him a knowing look. “Sure, whatever helps keep you going. So, how’d you find me?” He grins. “It was the town-smiting, wasn’t it? I wondered if it was a bit too much like what Daddy did to Sodom and Gomorrah, but he did such a nice job with the turning people who saw it to salt, that I couldn’t resist. And honestly, I don’t care anymore. You guys can’t stop me.”

“Don’t underestimate us,” Sam says.

“Oh, I will. Because you _can’t_ stop me.” He pauses. “Y’know, a month ago, I’d probably have let you catch me. It was a brief depressive episode where I wallowed that I couldn’t find Jack so we could rule together. But then it occurred to me, _why_ would I want to rule this place? This . . . ball of rock, water, and tissue. I _don’t_ need it, and I _don’t_ need him. I can go _anywhere_. I don’t need to keep playing with Daddy’s broken toys.”

“They are not broken,” Castiel says. “They just have the freedom to choose.”

Lucifer rolls his eyes. “Yeah, I know. Free will, Dad’s ‘gift’ to mankind. Something you and me had to earn. Wasn’t worth it though, was it?”

Castiel pauses. “I think, the good outweighs the bad. Even if it doesn’t always seem like it.”

Lucifer scoffs. “I’m getting bored with your sentimental nonsense. If you’re here to capture me, just get on with it.”

Sam gives a small smile. “We’re not here to catch you. We’re here to kill you.”

Lucifer chuckles. “Unless Daddy’s given Castiel another powerup, I’d say you’re out of luck. And last I heard, Purgatory’s still intact.”

“Thankfully, we have something better.”

Lucifer gives them a skeptical look. “And what, pray tell, could that be?”

He suddenly seizes, his hands moving behind his back.

“One pissed off witch and an Archangel with a grudge,” Rowena says, sauntering in front of him with Gabriel at her heels.

Lucifer regards them with an incredulous look. “You should be dead.”

Gabriel rolls his eyes. “Next time bro, try a little harder.”

Lucifer chuckles. “Am I supposed to be scared of _you_? You’re too _cowardly_ to do _anything_.”

Gabriel glances away. “Maybe I was. But you underestimate us. You’ve hurt too many people . . . hurt all of us. We can’t let you keep living.”

Fear flashes in Lucifer’s eyes and he starts struggling against his bonds. “You won’t do it. You can’t, I’m your brother!”

“That didn’t stop you.”

Lucifer pauses, glancing at Sam. “Come on, you can’t let him do this,” he says almost desperately. “We’re one in the same, two halves made whole.”

“I am _not_ a part of you,” Sam says maliciously. “I’m my own person.”

Rowena pushes him to his knees, a look of triumph on her face. “Let’s see how you like being belittled.”

Lucifer glares at them. “Well, get on with it then,” he spits.

Gabriel takes out his Archangel Blade and holds an Angel Blade out to Sam. At his confused look, he says, “You need this. We all need this.”

Castiel takes out his own blade and hands a different one to Rowena.

Lucifer scoffs. “Et tu, Brute,” he says mockingly.

Gabriel grins. “I hope you like it in the Empty. I hear it’s a wonderful place,” he says before they stab him with their blades.

Lucifer’s eyes and mouth start pouring out light, his Grace burning itself out. After a few seconds, his Vessel falls back, the ashy outlines of his wings barely visible against the grey-black ground.

Sam lets out a breath, stepping back.

Gabriel and Castiel look at Lucifer’s body, something bordering on remorse in their eyes.

Rowena grins. “Well, now that that’s over, I’d like to get out of this place. It’s very depressing, isn’t it?”

Gabriel nods, pressing two fingers against Sam and Rowena’s heads. They reappear in the Bunker library. A few seconds pass with them all glancing awkwardly at each other.

Eventually, Gabriel says, “So . . . pizza party?”

Sam huffs a laugh. “Y’know what, why not.”

Gabriel grins. “Great, ‘cause I know this place with the _best_ pizza.”

“Of course you do,” Castiel mutters.

“Hey, at least I know how to have fun. Besides, this gives us an excuse to get into the liquor cabinet.”

Rowena perks up. “Oh, I do like the sound of that.”

“Then I’ll be right back,” Gabriel says before disappearing with the sound of wings unfurling.

Sam chuckles. “Okay. Cas, do you know what liquor cabinet he’s talkin’ about?”

-

A few hours later found them all drunk of their asses. Even Castiel, who’d grudgingly tried whatever it was Gabriel made for him.

There was a mix of songs playing in the background, courtesy if Gabriel. None of them really complained, but mostly because they were too drunk to care.

“So, ‘bout that date you m’ntioned y’strday,” Gabriel slurs, slinging an arm overs Sam’s shoulder. “When’s that g’nna happ’n?”

“D’nno, ask Row’na,” Sam says, gesturing at her and Castiel’s general direction.

Gabriel gets a confused look on his face. “Why R’wena?”

“She’s plann’ng it.”

“Oh. When’d that happ’n?”

“D’nno, few nights ‘go.”

Gabriel immediately thinks back to the conversation he had with Castiel around the same time. He didn’t remember hearing anything going on during that, but he also wasn’t paying attention. It didn’t really matter anyways, but he was still confused enough to stumble over to where Rowena and Castiel were.

They glance up at him, and Rowena says, “Loki, what d’ you want?”

“Sam said you w’re planning our date. I w’nna know what’s gonna happ’n.”

“Don’t w’rry ‘bout it,” Castiel slurs. “We got it ‘ll planned.”

Gabriel furrows his eyebrows in confusion. “When’d you get ‘n on th’s?”

Castiel waves his hand dismissively. “Y’sterday. R’wena m’ntioned it, so I ‘sked if I could h’lp.”

“ ‘nd you can’t tell me ‘nything?”

Rowena and Castiel shake their heads.

Gabriel groans. “But I w’nna know,” he whines.

“Yer not gettin’ nothin’,” Rowena slurs.

Gabriel looks over at Sam. “C’me on Sam, back me up h’re.”

Sam shrugs. “They kn’w wh’t they’re doin’.”

Gabriel pouts. “But I w’nna know.”

“Tr’st us, brother,” Castiel says, drunkenly putting a hand on his shoulder.

Gabriel gives him a look. “You’re th’ last being I tr’st to plan a date. You can’t even g’t Dean-o t’ go out w’th you.”

Castiel glares at him.

Rowena laughs. “You’ve got a good point th’re. But _I’m_ th’ one doing most ‘f the plannin’.”

“I st’ll wanna know what’s g’nna happ’n.”

“No,” Castiel says petulantly.

Rowena nods. “ ‘nd if you keep asking, ’ll bind you.”

“No you won’t.”

“Don’t test me, Loki.”

“J’st tell me,” Gabriel whines.

“Adligetur Fera,” Rowena says, waving her hand at him.

A red light wraps around Gabriel’s wrists and ankles, tightening as he lets out a yelp.

Sam starts laughing and Gabriel glares at him. He opens his mouth to say something, but only lets out a strangled sound. He gives Rowena a panicked look, and she grins.

“D’d you really th’nk I’d let you keep runnin’ yer mouth? Ha! Unlikely!”

Gabriel glares at her and Castiel starts laughing along with Sam.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, I am so glad this chapter is done. Honestly, I've been thinking about how this was going to play out for the past few weeks and I've finally finished it. I just really wanted Lucifer dead at the hands of Sam, Castiel, Gabriel, and Rowena.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this chapter was supposed to be something else entirely, but then someone pointed out something in the last chapter and I couldn't resist changing it. Enjoy.

Gabriel couldn’t speak. Not in a struck speechless kinda way, though. More of a, I-literally-can’t-move-my-lips-and-no-sound-is-being-made, kinda way.

When he fully realized this, Gabriel ran to the library, looking for Sam and Castiel. Luckily, both of them, as well as Rowena, were there.

Gabriel runs up to Sam and starts shaking his shoulders urgently.

Sam turns around, a surprised look on his face. “Oh, you’re finally up. What’s wrong.”

Gabriel notices Castiel and Rowena glance at him with interested looks, and points to his mouth, eyes wide.

“Oh, that,” Sam says too casually, closing his book. He smiles, but not the one Gabriel was used to. This one was cruel—heartless. Reminiscent of far too many beings he’d come across in his long, long life.

Gabriel starts backing away slowly as similar looks appear on Castiel and Rowena’s faces.

“Y’see, we got tired of your little quips,” Sam says, standing up. “All those comments you think are _so_ funny.”

“There’s only so much we can take, _brother_ ,” Castiel says cruelly.

Rowena reaches into her pockets and takes out a needle and thread. “Let’s pay homage to your alias, Loki,” she says, sauntering up to him. “Though I like to think I wouldn’t have been fooled by your tricky words.”

-

Gabriel wakes violently, eyes wide. He takes in a deep breath and glances over at Sam and Castiel, who were sleeping peacefully. Fighting back the images that rose in his mind, Gabriel shakes his head and looks away

Then, carefully as he can, he gets off the bed and walks out of the room.

He ends up in one of the more abandoned parts of the Bunker, though he remembered what it was like when it was operational.

A few more minutes of wandering takes him to a room he hadn’t seen in a long, long time.

Gabriel steps through the doorway and notices faded sigils painted on the ground. Even freshly laid, they’d never been able to do anything, so he steps over them and sits down, leaning against one of the walls.

In the quietness of the room, thoughts he’d been pointedly ignoring flared up.

Were they annoyed by the stuff he said? It’s not like they ever brought it up, but how would he know? Both Sam and Castiel were too polite to bring up anything like that if they felt that way. Rowena would probably be the one to say something, but maybe she was just being nice.

Gabriel closes his eyes, trying to drown out his thoughts. After a few moments of indecision, he quietly starts singing.

“Do you know what it's like when, you're scared to see yourself? Do you know what it's like when, you wish you were someone else, who didn't need your help to get by? Do you know what it's like, to wanna surrender?”

He feels tears prick the corners of his eyes and ignores them as he continues singing softly.

-

“Hey, where were you this morning?” Sam asks a few seconds after Gabriel walks in the kitchen. “Me ‘nd Cas missed you.”

Gabriel opens his mouth to say something, but pauses, a look of indecision coming over his face. After a few seconds, he shakes his head and puts on a bright, fake smile.

‘Thinking,’ he signs.

Sam gives him an odd look before nodding. “Oh. Well, are you coming back tonight?”

Gabriel hears the hopeful note in his voice and nods. ‘I just . . . needed some time.’

Sam nods again. “Well, I’m glad you got it. Sometimes it’s nice to be alone.”

Gabriel gives him an almost uncertain grin. ‘Yeah.’

Sam gives him a sympathetic look and leans in to peck him on the lips, since that always seemed to cheer up the Archangel. “Well, if you ever need anyone to talk to, me ‘nd Cas’ll always be there.” He pauses considerably. “And, well, Rowena too, I guess.”

Gabriel brightens a bit. “I know,” he says quietly.

-

Over the next few days, Sam and Castiel noticed Gabriel drawing back and becoming more reclusive. More worryingly, perhaps, was that he also talked a lot less frequently than before, opting to use sign language instead. It worried them, but they knew not to ask about it. However, it was getting more and more difficult.

Especially once Rowena brought it up.

“So, what’s going on with him?” she asks, noticing the way he’d been not-so-subtly avoiding her.

Sam shrugs. “We don’t know.”

Rowena gives them a confused look. “Why? Haven’t you asked him?”

Sam and Castiel share an uncomfortable look.

“Well . . .” Sam starts.

“It’s best if we don’t,” Castiel supplies. “These types of things . . . it’s usually better if they sort themselves out.”

Rowena nods, an understanding look on her face. “That’s all well and good, but what happens if it doesn’t work out? He might just decide one day he doesn’t want to try and leaves.”

Sam and Castiel look away and she softens her gaze.

“I’m not saying he will. I’m just saying that problems don’t just go away. Us, of all people, should understand that.”

Sam nods. “I know. And you’re probably right.”

“I am always right, Samuel.”

Sam and Castiel chuckle.

“Besides, it’s been a while since you boys last had a heart-to-heart. I may not be the most emotionally balanced, but I do know it’s good for you.”

They nod.

“Well, you could always join us,” Sam offers nonchalantly.

Rowena pauses, an indecipherable look coming over her face. “If you feel that’s best,” she says with an air of someone asked to do an egregious task. But, Sam and Castiel both heard the gratefulness that rested under her words.

-

Knowing better than to corner the Archangel, they opted for a more subtle approach.

The next time Sam had a moment alone with Gabriel, both of them waiting for Castiel to come to bed, he brought it up.

“So, what’s been going on?” he asks, stroking the Archangel’s hair, which was now longer than his own.

Gabriel stiffens and shifts uncomfortably. ‘Nothing,’ he signs nonchalantly.

Sam gives him a look. “Gabe . . . I’m not blind. You’ve been withdrawing. I just . . . I wanna help you.”

Gabriel glances away. ‘Not important.’

“It is important, Gabriel. _You_ are important.”

 _But I’m not_ , Gabriel thinks. “I’m _fine_ , Sam,” he says aloud.

Sam stays silent for a few seconds. Eventually, he says, “You’re not fine. I’m not either. Hell, even Cas and Rowena aren’t. None of us are—will ever be. There’s times it’ll feel better. But . . . there’s always something that’ll set us back. And when that happens, I’ll be there to help you pick up the pieces. All of us will.”

Gabriel swallows thickly and nods. “Thanks,” he chokes out.

Sam gives a small smile and kisses Gabriel’s temple, pulling the Archangel closer. “You’re welcome,” he murmurs.

-

 _“Molt’s coming soon,”_ Castiel says carefully, running his fingers through Gabriel’s feathers.

Gabriel nods.

_“I was thinking . . . maybe Sam could join us? He always helps me, and I know he’s been feeling kind of left out.”_

Gabriel pauses, moving his hands to his lap. _“Sure,”_ he says quietly, smiling uncertainly.

Castiel sighs and takes back his hands. _Brother . . . what is going on?”_

Gabriel huffs a laugh and thinks back to the conversation he recently had with Sam. _“I’m fine, Cassy.”_

 _“No you’re not.”_ He pauses, glancing away. After a few seconds, he says, _“You know . . . we don’t mind your words.”_

 Gabriel freezes.

_“I . . . well, you talk in your sleep. I noticed you woke up from a nightmare a few nights ago, but you left before I could say anything.”_

Gabriel nods, drawing in on himself.

Castiel gives him a sympathetic look. _“I know it’s just remnants of the beings you used to be. Even back when you were Gabriel, the Messenger, you still found a way to make us smile. And while I admit I know very little of your time as Loki, I know you well enough to say that you would put up that front.”_ He pauses. _“Your words . . . they remind me of simpler times. Times when there was nothing to worry about, and we whiled away the time fooling around with our brothers and sisters. Times long since past, but ones I never will forget.”_

Gabriel closes his eyes and hangs his head, trying to hold back the tears welling up. He nods. _“Thanks, Cassy,”_ he says quietly.

Castiel smiles. _“You are welcome, brother. Just know that we do care about you, and no matter how many times we may be exasperated with some things you say, it does not mean we will stop.”_

Gabriel gives a small smile. _“I appreciate that, Castiel.”_

His brother nods. _“So long as you know.”_ He pauses. Eventually, he softly sings, “Do you know what it's like when, you're not who you wanna be? Do you know what it's like to, be your own worst enemy, who sees the things in me I can't hide? Do you know what it's like, to wanna surrender.”

Gabriel chuckles before quietly continuing the lyric, “I don't wanna feel like this tomorrow, I don't wanna live like this today. Make me feel better, I wanna feel better. Stay with me here now, and never surrender.”

-

Honestly, Gabriel wasn’t even surprised when the next time he and Rowena were alone together, she started talking to him.

They were in the library, reading books on magic and occasionally having brief debates about said magic, before she all to casually closed her book and looks at Gabriel.

“So, you’ve been doing better these past few days,” she says nonchalantly.

Gabriel chuckles and the conversations he’d recently had with Sam and Castiel come to mind. “Yeah,” he says quietly. “I’ve had a little help.”

Rowena nods. “That’s always a good thing.” She pauses. “Although, I will admit I am feeling kind of left out.”

Gabriel gives her a confused look and she continues.

“I mean, when you started signing instead of speaking, Sam and Castiel seemed to know exactly what to do. I actually asked them about it, but they told me it was something you should tell me yourself.”

Gabriel nods, looking down. After a few moments of indecision, he reaches out with two fingers and Rowena flinches away.

Gabriel immediately draws his hand back. “Sorry,” he says quickly.

“It’s alright,” Rowena says quietly.

Gabriel gets an uncertain look on his face, shifting uncomfortably in his seat. “What they’re talking about . . . it’s not something easily told. If you’re okay with it, I’d like to show you instead.”

Rowena pauses for a few seconds before nodding minutely.

Gabriel reaches out and touches two fingers to her forehead, opening up his memories to her.

He didn’t show everything, there were some things he never wanted to relive, but he showed everything she needed to see.

He showed the times Metatron bound and gagged him, occasionally stealing his Grace to give himself a powerup. The days where Crowley grew bored of their conversations and stole his voice, and the cell that he was forced to call home, a constant reminder of his captivity. When Crowley left and Asmodeus showed up, sewing his mouth shut and keeping him powerless.

And finally, the dream he’d had a few nights ago and the subsequent terror he’d felt afterwards.

Carefully withdrawing his fingers, Gabriel gives Rowena an almost frightened look.

Her expression immediately softens and she reaches out a hand before stopping. “I’m sorry,” she says quietly. “I . . . I didn’t know.”

Gabriel nods.

“If . . . if my actions a few nights ago started all of this, I am truly sorry. I was . . . drunk and ignorant to the effects of my magic. This in no way excuses it, but I hope you can forgive me.”

“I do,” Gabriel says. “I already have.”

Rowena gives him a thankful look.

-

A few hours after his talk with Rowena, Gabriel noticed it was raining outside the Bunker. Deciding it had been far too long since he’d last been in the middle of a storm, he walks outside.

It was pouring, and within minutes Gabriel was soaked. He takes in a deep breath and spreads his wings, closing his eyes and feeling the rain on his skin.

-

Later on when the clouds started thinning, Gabriel hears the Bunker door open and turns around, seeing Sam, Castiel, and Rowena walking up the steps.

He gives them a small smile before sitting down and closing his eyes.

A few seconds later, Sam and Castiel settle on either side of him while Rowena sits behind him, starting to play with his hair.

Eventually, Gabriel says, “You guys tricked me.”

“No, we didn’t,” Sam says. “We just reminded you of things you already knew.”

Gabriel nods. “You still tricked me. And ambushed me.”

Castiel makes a noncommittal noise. “Not really. We just took advantage of times when we were alone with you.”

Gabriel chuckles. “Whatever you wanna call it . . . I’m glad.”

“Of course you are,” Rowena says, splitting Gabriel’s hair into two parts. “Everyone needs a pep talk sometimes.”

Gabriel smiles. “I guess you’re right there.”

“I’m always right,” Rowena says sagely, carefully dividing the left side into three parts and starting to braid it.

Gabriel chuckles and closes his eyes.

-

About ten minutes later, after the rain stopped and Rowena had long since finished braiding Gabriel’s hair and moved onto Sam, they noticed a rainbow appearing in the clouds.

“Y’know, your bible gets it wrong,” Gabriel comments.

Sam chuckles. “What is it this time?”

“Rainbows,” Gabriel says simply. “It wasn’t my Father who made them.”

“What was it then?” Rowena asks.

Gabriel glances at Castiel. “Fledglings. They noticed how rain helped the plants and animals. How it could turn a simple field into something beautiful and colorful. So, they utilized those colors and made something . . . truly awesome. I was actually pretty surprised when they showed me. I was, uh . . . not the best at helping them figure out their Grace.”

Castiel smiles softly. “You did well enough, brother.”

Gabriel nods and looks back to the rainbow. He chuckles. “You are right, Castiel. Those were simpler times.”

Castiel nods. “Yes. But, I would not trade these ones for those. Even if it were possible, there are many things now I would not give up for the world.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If anyone's curious, the song Gabriel and Castiel are singing is Skillet's Never Surrender. (which is the song this fic is named after, and I highly recommend you listen to it because it's awesome)


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So . . . this chapter was originally supposed to be Sam and Gabriel's date, but I couldn't write it. So, instead I did a prompt I got from VegasGranny. And, honestly, this chapter is just a funny thing bordering on crack. And I also may or may not have purposefully ignored certain things for the sake of plot purposes, *cough*AngelGrace*cough*. Yeah . . . just, I apologize for this, and VegasGranny, I hope you like it.

A day or so later found all four of them in the library. Gabriel and Rowena had gotten into yet another debate about magic, with Castiel joining occasionally while Sam watched with mild amusement, pretending to read the book he’d picked out.

“Summoning spells are _the_ most annoying thing,” Gabriel says. “It’s all, ‘Oh, great god Loki, do grant me a boon and I’ll give you X’. And most of the time, I’m being summoned by some halfwit and they’re offering me a kid they kidnapped from somewhere. Like, get outta here with that virgin sacrifice bullshit.”

“But that’s from your side,” Rowena points out. “It’s always good for us to have a backup option when our magic just doesn’t cut it.”

“Yeah, but it’s rarely a professional summoning me. And even then, some of them aren’t offering anything I want. They should just find someone else to do their dirty work. Go to a crossroads or something.”

“We’re usually more powerful than the demons, so it makes a moot point. And besides, isn’t it such a relief when someone who actually knows what they’re doing summons you?”

“Well, yeah. But those are few and far between.” Gabriel pauses. “Y’know, I blame the internet. Everything is so available now. I mean, what happened to searching for the right old scrap of paper so you could get the spell you want.”

“Oh, but that’s so medieval. Though I will admit, it was more exciting.”

“Exactly! I mean, you guys just need to make friends in high places so us pagans don’t have to worry about anything anymore.”

“Well, not everyone has the kind of access you do, Loki. Which is why we summon you.”

“Then at least be a little more accommodating. I mean, it’s usually some dark foreboding forest you guys do this stuff. Like, spring for a decent motel room at the very least.”

Rowena rolls her eyes. “Well, _some_ of us try. I seem to remember giving you more than a ‘decent motel room’, and you _still_ complained.”

Gabriel opens his mouth to say something, but pauses.

Rowena gives him a look. “That’s what I thought. I even managed to dig up something you were interested in, and only then were you even a little nicer.”

Gabriel pouts and glances away, muttering something under his breath.

“What was that, Loki?”

“It’s not important,” Gabriel says dismissively. “And by the way, how did you know I was looking for one of your hex bags?”

Rowena gets a vaguely offended look on her face and scoffs. “Well, you didn’t think I was summoning you without knowing exactly what you needed? Ha, that’s laughable. I just had to ask the right people.”

Gabriel nods. “It’s just too bad not everyone does their homework.”

“Well, but that’d be no fun, now would it?”

“For you maybe, but it still sucks being summoned by people who don’t know what they’re doing.”

“Do you even have to answer summons?” Castiel asks.

Gabriel pauses. “Well, yeah. I mean, I used to be able to choose, but that was a _long_ time ago. Now, my Grace and pagan magic are so entwined that I can’t really do much if I don’t want to.”

“Makes sense,” Sam says. He lets out a yawn and closes his book. “Well, as riveting as this conversation is, I think I’m gonna go to bed.”

“But it’s only, like, eight o’clock.”

Sam shrugs. “My head kinda hurts, and I haven’t really been feeling well today.”

Gabriel gives him a concerned look and moves to snap his fingers, but pauses. Instead, he magiks up a bottle of ibuprofen and a glass of water, holding them out to Sam.

Sam gives him a grateful look and takes them. “Thanks,” he says, walking towards the hallway.

“No problem, kiddo,” Gabriel says, turning back to Rowena and Castiel.

-

The next morning, both Castiel and Gabriel woke up before Sam. This was odd for several reasons, but the most concerning was because they had an internal alarm clock they both had set for nine-ish, and Sam was always up before them.

Gabriel gets a confused look on his face and starts shaking him. “Sa~am, it’s time to get up.”

“Meh,” he says, sleepily swatting at Gabriel. “ ‘S too early.”

“It’s nine, Sam.”

“Still too early.”

Castiel and Gabriel share equally concerned looks and Gabriel holds a hand against Sam’s forehead. “Damn, kiddo. You’re burning up.”

“Shh,” Sam says. “No talkie.”

“Sam, you’re sick,” Castiel says.

“No ‘m not. Don’ get sick.”

“Except that you are,” Gabriel says.

“Shh. Jus’ lemme sleep.”

“Come on, Sam,” Gabriel whines. “Get up.”

“No.”

Gabriel pouts and Castiel shrugs.

“Well, I hope you get better,” the Angel says, starting to get out of the bed.

“Wait, no,” Sam says, blindly reaching out a hand. “Cassy come back.”

“I am sorry Sam, but I have things to do,” Castiel says, walking out the door.

“Ca~as,” Sam whines. “Come back.”

Gabriel raises an eyebrow and shakes his head. “Well, if you won’t get up, then I’m gonna go too.”

“No, you can’t leave me,” Sam mumbles, his words muffled by his pillow.

“Why not?”

“ ‘Cause I don’t want you to.”

Gabriel chuckles. “Well, if you’re acting like a kid, then I’m gonna treat you like a kid.”

“ ‘M not acting like a kid,” Sam says petulantly.

“Yes you are.” Gabriel pauses, his eyes widening. “Y’know what, I’m gonna build you a blanket fort.”

Sam turns his head and blearily gives Gabriel a confused look. “Wha’?”

“A blanket fort,” Gabriel says definitively before getting off the bed.

“No~o, come back,” Sam whines, reaching out an arm.

After a few seconds of silence, he shifts into a more comfortable position and mutters, “Sadistic Angel bastards,” before falling asleep.

-

“Gabriel, get back here!” Castiel exclaims, attempting to chase his brother down.

“I’m building a blanket fort!”

“That does not excuse you stealing all the blankets, put them back!”

“You’re not using them!”

Castiel pauses, faltering in his steps. “Well . . . you shouldn’t be building a blanket fort.”

“It’s for Sam!”

At this, Castiel stops his running entirely and gives his brother a confused look. “Why does Sam need a blanket fort?”

Gabriel also stops and warily watches his brother over the pile of blankets in his hands. “ ‘Cause he’s sick.”

“I fail to see why that means he needs a blanket fort.”

Gabriel’s eyes widen. “Why Cassy, every sick person deserves a blanket fort. Besides, I haven’t done this in a few years and it’s always good to be childish occasionally.”

Castiel gives him a look. “Gabriel, you are thousands upon millions upon billions of years old,” he deadpans. “Even by our standards, that is a long time.”

“So?”

Castiel sighs. “Never mind,” he mutters, walking away. “Just, make sure you put them back when you’re done.”

“Ugh, fine,” Gabriel grouses, continuing to the library.

-

_“Ca~as,”_ Sam prays. _“Get in here, I need you.”_

“What is it, Sam?” Cas asks, appearing in the room.

“You came!” Sam says happily. “ ’M thirsty, can you get me some water?”

Cas sighs before waving his hand and making a glass appear on his nightstand. “Anything else?”

“Come back to bed,” Sam says, reaching out a hand.

Cas sighs again. “No.”

“Why not?” Sam whines.

“I have other things to do.”

“ _Please_?”

“No.”

Sam pouts and Cas walks out the door.

After a few minutes, Sam starts praying again.

_“Ga~be, get in here, I need you.”_

“What d’ya need, Samshine?” Gabriel asks, appearing in the room.

“Come back to bed,” he says, reaching out a hand.

“I can’t.”

“Why not?”

“I’m building a blanket fort.”

“Why?”

“For you.”

“But I want you to come back to bed.”

“Sorry, kiddo. Not right now,” he says, walking outside.

“No, come back,” Sam whines.

After a few seconds of silence, Sam pouts and glances at the water on his nightstand. Against his better judgement, he drinks some of it and settles back into the bed.

-

At around midday, Rowena finally emerged to the library and was floored by how drastically different it looked. The tables had all been rearranged and there were blankets of all sorts draped across them.

She gapes at it, stunned, when Gabriel pokes his head out from the front of it.

He grins. “You like it?”

Rowena blinks a few times, closing her mouth. “What in the name of your Father happened here?”

“I made a blanket fort.”

“I can see that,” she says, taking it in. “Why?”

“Sam’s sick, so I made it for him. I was just about to go get him.”

Rowena nods slowly. “I . . . suppose that makes sense,” she says, obviously still confused.

“Yep.”

“Well, have fun, I guess,” she says, walking away.

“I will,” Gabriel says, crawling out of the fort. He glances at the hallway and disappears.

-

Sam groggily wakes up when he hears one of the Angels appear in his room.

“Wha’d’ya want?” he asks tiredly

“I’m taking you to the blanket fort,” Gabriel says, turning the light on.

“Hiss,” Sam says, covering his eyes. “Don’ wanna leave.”

“Aw, come on Samsquatch. It’ll be fun, I promise.”

“No.”

Gabriel sighs. “Well, you’re coming whether you like it or not,” he says, picking Sam up.

He lets out a distressed noise as Gabriel starts walking to the library.

-

Both Rowena and Cas were there, watching with interested looks as Gabriel walks out with Sam in his arms.

“Good afternoon, Samuel,” Rowena says, a small smile on her face. “I trust you’re having a pleasant day.”

Sam half-heartedly glares at her and she laughs.

Cas gives all of them an exasperated look.

“Well,” Rowena starts, “I think I best be going, I’ve some things to take care of.”

“No, don’t,” Sam whines, reaching out an arm. “You have to save me.”

“Sorry Sam, but I’m sure you’re in good hands,” Rowena says, waving as she walks away with a small smile on her face.

“Meh,” Sam says petulantly. He looks at Cas expectantly. “Will you save me?”

Cas gets a look on his face that could almost be considered amused and shakes his head. “My brother means you no harm, despite his unorthodox methods.” He gives Gabriel a look. “And besides, I’ve been meaning to see how things are in Heaven.”

Gabriel rolls his eyes and Sam pouts.

“Why’s it always gotta be Dean you save? Can’t you be my . . . Angel in shining trench coat for once?”

Cas hides a smile and Gabriel makes an offended noise.

“I apologize Sam, but I have the utmo . . . well, I trust Gabriel won’t let any harm befall you. I will be back around midday tomorrow,” he says before disappearing with the sound of wings unfurling.

“Okay, time to get in the fort,” Gabriel says, laying Sam down outside the entrance. “Go on in.”

“No.”

“Come on, Sam.”

“No.”

“So you’re just gonna lay there on the floor.”

There’s a pause before, “Yes.”

Gabriel sighs and crawls inside the fort from one of the sides. “It’s really nice in here.”

“It was nice in my bed too,” Sam mutters.

Gabriel sighs again. “Then I’ll drag you in here.”

“Meh.”

Gabriel rolls his eyes and goes to the entrance. “I will.”

“Don’ care.”

“Fine,” he says, opening the entrance and grabbing Sam’s arms before pulling him in.

Sam carefully opens his eyes, encouraged by the relative dimness of the fort. “Whoa,” he says incredulously. “It’s bigger than I expected.”

“Perks of being an Archangel, Sasquatch.”

“Hm,” Sam hums, settling into the pillows. “So it’s like that spell Hermione used in Deathly Hallows on her purse thing?”

Gabriel pauses considerably. “Something like that, I guess.”

“Cool,” Sam mumbles. “But you’re still mean for dragging me out of bed.”

“Aw, come on Samshine, don’t be like that.”

“I’m sick, it’s my right.”

Gabriel raises an eyebrow. “So you admit it now?”

There’s a pause. “No.”

Gabriel rolls his eyes. “Whatever. This place is more comfortable than your bed, so you don’t get to complain anymore.”

 Sam opens his mouth to say something, but quickly closes it, looking away and muttering something under his breath.

Gabriel lets out a mock-horrified gasp. “Why Sammy, how could you say such things. It’s not very befitting a lady.”

Sam glares at him. “You’re evil,” he says petulantly. “You could’ve snapped us here in an instant, but you didn’t. Instead you dragged me out here like a heathen.”

“I know you don’t like when I do that, so I didn’t.”

Sam pauses. “I don’t?”

Gabriel gives him a look. “Trust me kiddo, I know what I’m talkin’ about.”

“Whatever,” Sam mumbles. “You’re still evil. And a sadist.”

Gabriel looks away, an indecipherable look coming over his face.

Sam notices and sighs. “But you’re also sweet,” he says, pressing a kiss against Gabriel’s lips. “No one’s ever made me a blanket fort before.”

“Then I apologize for your previously blanket fort-less life.”

“ ‘S ok, I don’ mind. ‘M just glad you’re not leaving again.”

“You know I’d never do that.”

Sam glances away. “Yeah,” he says quietly.

-

A few hours after Sam fell asleep, Castiel appears inside of the blanket fort. Gabriel looks at him in surprise and the Angel glances around curiously.

“Brother, I do not believe this is an appropriate use of your Grace,” he says eventually.

Gabriel gets a vaguely offended look on his face. “Well, how do you know I didn’t use my pagan magic.”

“I can tell the difference. Is Sam doing better?” he asks, looking at the younger Winchester.

Gabriel shrugs. “Probably.”

“Well, I got him some soup,” Castiel says, taking out a Styrofoam bowl that had oyster crackers on the top. “I admit I don’t know much about being sick, as I was fortunate enough to not encounter it while I was human. But, from what I understand, soup is essential.”

“And right you are Cassy,” Gabriel says, taking the bowl. “Where’d you get it?”

“I am not actually sure. First I attempted to find someone called the ‘Soup Nazi’ in New York, but was unable to locate them. So I instead found a diner somewhere and ordered something from them.”

Gabriel’s eyes widen. “You stole it!”

Castiel blinks in surprise. “I most certainly did not, why would you say that?”

“You have no money. Unless you’ve been picking up a side job somewhere.”

Castiel looks away guiltily.

“Ha, I knew it! You dined and dashed, you rascal.”

“No . . .” Castiel trails off. “I simply . . . took a page out of your book, so to speak.”

Gabriel gives Castiel an interested look. “Oh, do tell.”

“I have noticed that money is a necessity sometimes, so I did what I noticed you do.”

Gabriel nods. “So you did steal something. Just not the soup.”

“Well . . . yes. I mean, it’s not like the million and billionaires will notice a few dollars missing.”

Gabriel grins. “Why Cassy, you sly dog. I’m glad you finally see the light.”

Castiel shifts uncomfortably in his seat. “It’s not like I had another choice, and I feel bad for leaving Sam alone, so . . .”

“I’m just glad you’re starting to see what a good influence I am. Just ‘cause you’ve grown up doesn’t mean I don’t still have a lot to teach you.”

Castiel gives him an unamused look. “You are a horrible influence, Gabriel.”

Gabriel makes a mock-offended noise. “Why Cassy, how dare you. Calling me out on things that are entirely true, where is your honor.”

Castiel gives a small smile. “At least I have honor, brother. Unlike a certain pagan who seems to have taken residence in this Bunker.”

Gabriel grins and lightly shoves at Castiel. “Well, at least I don’t have to go to a sandbox to spend hours with our stuffy siblings.”

Castiel gives him a look. “I get the feeling they would be a lot less ‘stuffy’ if they had someone to set a . . .” he pauses, a considerable look coming over his face. “different example.”

Gabriel rolls his eyes. “Oh, come on Cassy. You suck at subtlety. I’ll get on up there when I feel like it.”

Castiel shrugs. “Whatever you say, Gabriel.”

“Why thank you, Cassy. Speakin’ of which, you might wanna get back up there before they start missing you too much.”

Castiel glances upward. “You are correct. Give Sam my best wishes.” The next second, he’s gone.

Gabriel blinks. “Well, goodbye to you too.” He glances at the soup in his hands. It smelled really good. Maybe a little taste wouldn’t hurt.

-

The next time Sam wakes up, thankfully, it’s not to the sound of an Archangel appearing to drag him out of the comfort of his bed. Instead, it’s to the much more pleasant smell of soup.

He blearily opens his eyes and sees Gabriel sitting up next to him, something vaguely bowl-shaped in his hands.

“W’as tha’?” he asks sleepily.

Gabriel freezes, his eyes widening. He not-so-discretely hides the object in his hands behind him and puts on an impassive look. “I . . . don’t know what you’re talkin’ about.”

Sam gets a confused look on his face. “But you jus’ hid somethin’ behin’ your back.”

“No I didn’t,” Gabriel says unconvincingly.

“I smell soup, where’s the soup?”

Gabriel looks away guiltily. “Well . . . Cassy may or may not have dropped off some soup a few minutes ago.”

Sam gives Gabriel a suspicious look. “Gabe, where’s the soup?”

“What soup?”

“You ate it didn’t you?”

“No . . . maybe a little.”

“Gabriel!”

“It’s good soup!” the Archangel says defensively. “And most of it’s still left! Here,” he says, taking the bowl out and placing it in front of Sam, “you can have the rest.”

Sam glares at him and carefully sits up, keeping his eyes on Gabriel as he takes the soup. “Spoon.”

Gabriel waves his hand and a spoon appears in the bowl.

Sam refrains from thanking him and starts eating the soup while Gabriel looks on almost regretfully.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And yes, I know that technically Gabriel and Castiel could heal Sam with a thought, but like I said at the beginning, plot reasons. That's the only excuse I have.
> 
> Also, on the topic of Sam and Gabriel's date, I am going to apologize for bringing a lot of attention to it and then not actually writing it. I just really couldn't do it, and I don't know why, so I'm sorry. If I ever get around to doing it, I'll add in a bonus chapter or something.
> 
> (Oh, and we're gonna see a familiar face who hasn't been seen in a long, long time in the next chapter . . . I'll leave the guessing up to you)


	15. Heart's a Mess

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not dead! Sorry it's taken me so long to get this chapter up (a month!), but it just didn't wanna be written. Seriously, I've been working on this for almost every day these past few weeks and it just didn't wanna happen. But, it's a lot longer than my usual chapters (7,367 words!), so I hope that makes up for the wait. This thing is, like, 1,000 words longer than my first chapter, which was my longest until now.
> 
> Italics = Enochian

Sam was drunk. And, honestly, if he _really_ wanted to, he could find some semi-acceptable reason for why he was moping in the map room, nursing whatever he’d dug up from the cellar.

But he didn’t really want to.

Not that Sam didn’t know the real reason, he just didn’t want to admit it.

He hears the sound of the Bunker door opening and turns in his seat to see Castiel and Gabriel walking down the stairs, quietly conversing about something.

“Hey,” Sam says morosely, turning back to the map table.

“ ‘Sup,” Gabriel says offhandedly, not really paying attention.

Castiel gives his brother a look and moves to sit across from Sam. “Are you alright?” he asks, almost hesitantly.

Sam shrugs. “Dunno. ‘M kinda mad right now. Definitely upset. And maybe a little sad.”

Castiel nods and Gabriel sits down next to him. “Why are you feeling that way?”

Sam glances away. “Not telling.”

Castiel takes in an almost pained breath and Gabriel sighs.

“And why not?” the Archangel asks, an unimpressed look on his face.

“ ‘Cause I don’ wanna.”

Gabriel rolls his eyes and Castiel elbows him. “Are you certain you do not wish to elaborate?”

Sam pauses before shrugging. “Dunno. ‘M jus’ . . . feelin’ kinda left out, I guess.”

Castiel and Gabriel get equally confused looks on their faces and glance at each other.

“Well . . .” Gabriel starts. “Could ya . . . tell us why?”

Sam glances up at them, an almost considerable look on his face. After a few seconds, he sighs and takes out his phone, fumbling with the password a few times before pulling something up and handing it over to them.

After a few moments of confusion, their eyes widen in understanding. The phone was open to the calendar app, and on the day shown it said ‘molt’.

“Sam,” Castiel starts carefully. “It was not our intention to exclude you.”

He shrugs. “Hm. Well, neither of you asked, so I jus’ . . . assumed.”

Gabriel chuckles. “Y’know what they say about assumptions . . .”

Castiel gives his brother a look before turning back to Sam. “I apologize. It was not our intention to make you feel this way.” He nudges Gabriel, who sighs.

“Yeah, what he said.”

Sam tiredly glances up at them. “Doesn’ really matter anyways,” he mutters, taking a sip of his drink. “I get it.”

“Get what?” Castiel asks.

Sam sighs loudly. “You’re Angels. Beings that I could never really hope to understand that’ve been around since . . . well, ever. Why you even hang around me ‘nd Dean is jus’ . . . I don’ get it. Compared to how old you guys are, ‘m barely a blip.”

Castiel gets a concerned look and Gabriel’s face softens.

“Aw, come on Samshine. You know why.”

Sam shrugs. “Not really. Jus’ never really made sense to me. I never brought it up ‘cause I was too . . . scared or somethin’.” He glances at the glass in his hand. “Now ‘m jus’ drunk. ‘Nd tired.”

Castiel carefully reaches out and takes the drink from him. Sam gets a vaguely upset look on his face before sighing. “I get it if you guys don’ really wanna be here. I don’ really either.”

“What do you mean by that, Sam?” Castiel asks carefully.

Sam shrugs. “Like I said, ‘m tired. I jus’ . . . want it all to stop. Things ‘ve been pretty good these past few months but . . . I dunno.”

Castiel and Gabriel glance at each other, an unspoken conversation passing.

“Sam . . . we do really want to be here,” Castiel says.

“Yeah,” Gabriel adds. “If we didn’t, we wouldn’t.”

Sam looks up at them tiredly and sighs. “Yeah,” he says quietly. “Still don’ get it.” He glances at Castiel. “I mean, it’s our fault you’re in this position. You Fell for us . . . for Dean. If we hadn’t gotten in the way, you’d still be up in Heaven, and your siblings wouldn’t be dead.”

Castiel lets out a breath and glances away. “If that had happened, there would be no Earth. I might have all my brothers and sisters . . . but you two and Dean are enough for me. I’ve learned more in this decade than all the millennia up in Heaven, and that in and of itself makes me more in your debt than anything.”

Sam nods nonchalantly before looking to Gabriel. “And for the life of me, I can’t figure you out. You’re . . . Gabriel, Loki, whatever. An Arch-Angelic Norse Trickster god who never bothered to settle down. And yet . . . here you are. Hangin’ out with the Boy King with the demon blood and your kid brother. I mean, you and Dean are similar enough, and I know he wouldn’t even wanna be anywhere near this situation.” He chuckles self-deprecatingly. “Hell, it’s what he did, all those many years ago.”

Gabriel bites the inside of his lip, an uncomfortable look coming over his face. “Sam . . . you’re not wrong. I am exactly what you say I am, but infinitely less. Yeah, I ran. I never stayed in one place too long, never settled down.” He sighs. “But I’m tired too. Tired of running, and hiding, and . . . all that. Besides, staying here with you two is the best I’ve known in . . . a long, long time. And your brother and I are not as similar as you may think.”

Sam makes a noncommittal noise and half-heartedly reaches for the drink Castiel had taken from him. The Angel stands up and makes the glass disappear before standing behind Sam and placing his hands on his shoulders. “I believe it would be best if you got some sleep,” he says quietly.

Sam makes a vaguely upset noise. “Bu’ ‘m no’ tired.”

“Trust me, Sam, you will thank me in the morning,” he says, helping the hunter stand. “We can also continue our conversation, but only when you are sober.”

“ ‘M sober,” Sam mutters, placing a hand around Castiel’s shoulders and leaning against him.

Gabriel chuckles and walks over, helping his brother carry Sam to his room. “Kiddo, you’re piss drunk right now. What you need is sleep.”

“No’ tired,” Sam slurs, stifling a yawn.

Gabriel rolls his eyes and helps Castiel set Sam on the bed.

He falls asleep a few seconds later, and Castiel lets out a sigh. “Were you aware of this?” he asks, almost curiously.

Gabriel shakes his head. “No. He never said anything.”

Castiel nods. “We will have to deal with this in the morning.”

“Yeah, that’s gonna be fun.”

Castiel gives him a look. “But we have to.” He pauses for a few seconds. “Do you think we should let Sam help us with our molt? He always helped me, and I hate that he feels left out.”

Gabriel shifts uncomfortably. “Uh, yeah. I think it’s a good idea.”

Castiel tilts his head slightly and gives Gabriel a calculating look. “Are you sure.”

Gabriel sighs. “I don’ really wanna talk about it right now, and it’d be best if Sam were there to hear, so let’s just do this in the morning, okay?”

Castiel nods. “Okay.” He glances at Sam. “We should probably stay with him tonight.”

Gabriel pauses. “We do that every night, Cassy.” He says it as if Castiel should know, and is confused why he seemingly doesn’t.

Castiel blinks. “Oh, of course,” he says, shaking his head. “I’m just not thinking right now.”

Gabriel raises an eyebrow. “That does sound like you, Cassy. Always with your head in the clouds.”

The Angel gives him and unimpressed look and Gabriel laughs.

-

When Sam woke up the next morning, the first thing he noticed was a splitting headache. Immediately, he clutches his hands to his head and groans. What happened last night?

He tries to think back, but only gets as far as feeling upset about . . . something and getting a drink from the liquor cabinet Gabriel was kind enough to show him a few nights ago.

Sam pauses. Where were the Angels anyway? He glances around his room, not seeing them and figures they’re somewhere else in the Bunker.

Making an executive decision, Sam gets out of bed and starts walking to the kitchen, intent on eating something and seeing if he could find Castiel and Gabriel.

By the time he got to the map room, he heard quiet voices coming from the kitchen. Curious, he walks up to the doorway before pausing when he heard what they were talking about.

 _“Brother, they look fine,”_ Castiel was saying, almost pleadingly.

 _“No, Cassy. No compared to how they used to,”_ Gabriel replies mournfully.

_“Ours are almost identical, and Sam’s seen mine, so I don’t see the issue.”_

_“Well . . .”_ Gabriel trails off, an unsure tone lacing his voice. _“He saw my feather, Cassy. You all did. He knows what they should look like.”_

There’s a pause. _“Brother, you know Sam is not one to judge,”_ Castiel says, so quietly Sam almost missed it.

Gabriel sighs. _“Yeah, I know. I just . . . my wings aren’t pretty anymore, Cassy.”_

There’s another pause before Gabriel quickly says, _“Not that yours aren’t, of course. But you can pull off that whole edgy black feather look.”_

_“And you can’t?”_

_“Uh, no. Damn, you really need to learn more about accessorizing.”_

_“I still don’t see the problem, they look fine.”_

_“Exactly,”_ Gabriel exclaims. _“They’re just that—_ fine _. They used to be_ beautiful _, Cassy. You saw them, you know.”_

_“Yes, brother. But they don’t look bad now.”_

Feeling the need to intervene, Sam steps into the room before Gabriel could deny what Castiel said.

The Angels suddenly pause in their conversation, eyes wide as he walks into the kitchen.

Sam freezes, feeling put on the spot and wishing he’d thought this through. He clears his throat. “Uh, Gabe,” he starts awkwardly. “I’m sure they look nice. I’ve never seen ‘em before, but if they look anything like Cas’ then . . .” He trails off and notices Gabriel’s shoulders tense, almost like he did when . . .

“Wait!” Sam and Castiel exclaim at the same time as Gabriel disappears with the sound of wings unfurling.

Castiel lets out a sigh and hangs his head.

“Sorry,” Sam says quietly. “I didn’t mean . . .”

“I know,” Castiel says tiredly, pinching the bridge of his nose. “It’s alright.”

“What were, uh,” Sam clears his throat. “What were you guys talking about?”

“Gabriel’s wings. As you heard him say, he feels they are not ‘pretty’ anymore.”

“Why does that matter?”

Castiel sighs. “It shouldn’t, for any other Angel. Except, as you know, my brother tends to deviate from the norm. He’s just . . . embarrassed, I guess.”

“Why?”

“As you know, since the Fall, Angels have had black feathers. Before the only way was from Holy Fire or Hellfire. And apparently, he feels he can’t ‘pull it off’. Not to mention he’s upset about his stripe coloring, which I keep reminding him he can fix by helping out in Heaven, but he continues to refuse.”

Sam nods. “Do you know where he went?”

“No, but I would be glad to help you look.”

“It’s alright, I’d rather look alone.”

“Oh, okay,” Castiel says, a little dejectedly. “I should check on things in Heaven anyways.”

Sam opens his mouth to say something, but is cut off when Castiel disappears with the sound of wings unfurling.

Sam sighs, glancing at the kitchen doorway. He had an Archangel to find.

-

An hour or so later, Sam was almost ready to accept that Gabriel had flown somewhere outside the Bunker, if not for the face that no alarms had gone off.

(It was something they’d discovered a few weeks ago when Castiel and Gabriel had flown back into the Bunker after going on the first of what Gabriel referred to as ‘educational trips’. Sam, at this point, was afraid to ask what they were, but Castiel never complained, so he’d just accepted it. As for the alarms going off, the Angels hadn’t gone into much detail, but essentially the Men of Letters put up wards that could detect Angels, but would only go off in the presence of stronger ones i.e. Archangels)

Sam was almost finished searching the Bunker, or, well, searching the parts of the Bunker he knew existed. Maybe Gabriel was moving around? Or perhaps there was a secret room only he knew about?

At this point, Sam was half-tempted to call down Castiel to see if he could help, but still felt bad about sending him away earlier. The Angel probably didn’t want to see him anyways.

Nearing the end of his search, Sam looks down the last hallway he had to go through. If Gabriel wasn’t here, Sam didn’t know where he was.

Sighing, Sam walks to the first door and peeks inside. Seeing nothing, he moves on to the next one. Expecting to find nothing, Sam is exceptionally surprised to see Gabriel sitting amongst a pile of pillows and blankets, his back turned and a hand extended and fiddling with something in the air next to him.

Sam stands there in the doorway, too afraid to say anything.

Gabriel lets out a sigh and moves his hand to his lap. “Come in, Sam,” he says quietly.

Sam freezes.

Gabriel shifts his position so he was facing the wall to Sam’s right and hangs his head. “Come on,” he says softly, beckoning. “I’m not . . . not gonna run this time.”

Sam nods and steps into the room, closing the door behind him and sitting across from the Archangel.

There’s an awkward silence, neither of them looking the other in the eye.

Eventually, Gabriel says, “I’m sorry.”

Sam gives him a confused look. “What for?”

“Y’know . . . flying away like that. I shouldn’t have . . . I was scared, and it wasn’t right of me to just run away like that.” He sighs. “Especially considering what happened last night.”

Sam pauses. “You remember that?”

“Well, yeah. Don’t you?”

Sam glances away, embarrassed. “I think I was a bit too drunk to remember.”

Gabriel’s eyes widen. “Oh. Well, uh . . . I don’t really wanna go over it right now, but basically you were scared about me and Castiel leaving. I . . . I told you I was tired of running.” He huffs a laugh. “Turns out I’m more hypocritical than I thought.”

Sam nods. “It wasn’t your fault. I shouldn’t have been eavesdropping on your conversation.”

“Nah, it’s alright.”

“No, it’s not.” Sam sighs. “Look, I just wanna say I’m sorry.”

“Sam,” Gabriel says seriously. “It’s _fine_.”

Sam chews on the inside of his lip and glances away.

Gabriel sighs. “It’s not like we were even talking about anything important. I was just being dramatic.”

“You seemed upset about it,” Sam points out. “And Cas said you were embarrassed.”

Gabriel scowls and mutters something under his breath. Sam only catches the words ‘big-mouthed Seraph’.

Sam chuckles. “I thought Archangels were above such human emotions,” he teases.

Gabriel gives him an unimpressed look. “You should know by now that, as my _wonderful_ little brother said, I tend to ‘deviate from the norm’. Meaning I have free will. And being a pagan for the greater part of my life means I picked up a few things from you humans, no matter how much I didn’t wanna. One of those things happens to be caring about how others view me.”

Sam raises an eyebrow. “Really?” he asks skeptically.

Gabriel gives him an offended look. “Don’t take that tone with me, Winchester. You’re one to talk.”

Sam shrugs. “It’s just these past few months, you’ve been stealing my clothes to wear despite their inherent ‘lumberjack-ness’ as you so helpfully pointed out a while back.”

Gabriel pouts. “Not like you’re any better, Mr. I’m-gonna-wear-pajamas-since-it’s-just-me-Cas-and-Gabe.”

Sam opens his mouth to say something, but pauses, glancing down at his clothes. “It’s because you stole everything else I have,” he says petulantly.

“You coulda just asked for ‘em back,” Gabriel points out.

Sam pauses. “They’re not pajamas,” he mutters.

Gabriel raises an eyebrow. “Sure,” he says placatingly. “We’ll go with that.”

Sam mock-glares at him.

Gabriel laughs. “Well, my clothing choice aside, before I found myself hangin’ out with you and Cassy, I cared about my appearance. Still do, seeing as your human society is more about how you appear than who you are, no matter what claims are made otherwise. This also extends to the state of my wings, as you’ve probably guessed.”

Sam nods. “Well, from what I understand you just need to help out with things in Heaven.”

Gabriel shifts uncomfortably. “Well . . . yeah. But when I left Heaven, it wasn’t exactly amicable. They probably wouldn’t accept me if I came back now. Honestly, it would be worse if they just pretended but still held onto their resentment.”

“You can’t know until you try.”

Gabriel sighs. “Castiel’s been saying the same thing. He even claims they want me back.” He scoffs. “As if.”

Sam nods. “Then I can’t help you. But, Gabe, I don’t really care about what your wings look like.”

Gabriel gives him a suspicious look.

“I mean it. They’re a part of you, no matter what they look like, and that’s all that matters.”

Gabriel chews on his lip and glances away.

Sam sighs. After a few seconds of consideration, he softly sings, “Your heart’s a mess. You won’t admit to it.”

Gabriel looks at him, a look of almost surprise on his face.

“It makes no sense, but I’m desperate to connect. And you, you can’t live like this.”

Gabriel makes a noise that sounds vaguely like acknowledgement. “While that may be so, Sammy, it still doesn’t matter.”

“Yeah, it does. Because you matter.”

Gabriel scoffs and Sam gives him an unimpressed look.

“I mean it. At least you do to me, and Cas too. Even if you don’t wanna admit it.”

Gabriel sighs, glancing away. After a few moments of indecision, he closes his eyes and rolls his shoulders. There’s a bright flash of light and Sam covers his eyes.

After a few seconds, the brightness dies down and Sam lowers his hand, his mouth falling open at the sight in front of him.

Wings. They took up the entire space in front of him, but he could tell they weren’t fully extended because the rom was too small. Three sets with feathers that had gold tips and shafts fringed with red and grey stripes with black in the background. Sam could tell they were still pretty frayed, and some of them were already missing because of molt, but they were beautiful.

Sam slowly reaches out a hand, eyes wide with awe, and Gabriel flinches back. He immediately withdraws his hand, shame flushing his face. “Sorry, he says quietly.

Gabriel lets out an embarrassed noise. “No, I’m sorry. You can . . . touch them if you want.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah. Just, be careful. They’re still pretty fragile, and until I properly molt, I don’t trust they won’t crumble to dust.”

Sam nods before carefully reaching out a hand and stroking along the outer edge of one of the middle wings. Gabriel lets out a breath and hangs his head.

“You okay?” Sam asks carefully, slowing his hand.

“Yeah,” Gabriel says, but it sounds strained.

Sam gives him a vaguely concerned look and continues running his fingers through Gabriel’s feathers.

A few minutes later, they hear the door open and look in that direction.

Castiel shifts uncomfortably on his feet, still standing in the doorway. “Uh, hello,” he says awkwardly, raising his hand in greeting. “I hope I’m not interrupting anything.”

“No,” Sam says, shaking his head. “Gabriel was just showing me his wings.”

Castiel’s gaze flits to the Archangel’s wings before looking at Gabriel. He cocks an eyebrow and Gabriel rolls his eyes.

“Sam's more persuasive than I gave him credit for.”

Castiel keeps his dubious look and moves to sit so they were in a triangle formation. “Would I be correct to assume that your self esteem has gone up, even of only a little?”

Gabriel shrugs. “Eh, sure, I guess.”

Castiel gives him a look before glancing Heavenward and sighing.

Gabriel gets a vaguely offended look on his face and mutters something under his breath.

Sam gives the two of them an odd look. “Yeah,” he says slowly. “Anyways, what’re you doing here, Cas? I thought you weren't due ‘til tomorrow.”

Castiel gives him a confused look. “It is tomorrow,” he says slowly.

Sam blinks, then glances at Gabriel, an accusatory look on his face.

The Archangel shrugs sheepishly. “What? I'm not allowed to abuse my Angelic powers every now and again?”

Sam and Castiel both give him a look.

Gabriel rolls his eyes.

Castiel sighs. “To more thoroughly answer your question, Sam, I went looking for you and Gabriel after I got back and did not see you in the library or kitchen. I came across this room a minute or so ago and that’s when I walked in.” He pauses, glancing around. “Why is the floor covered with pillows and blankets?”

“So it’s more comfy,” Gabriel says. “It’s Sam’s dismantled blanket fort.”

Castiel gives him a disapproving look. “I thought you were going to put them away after you were done.”

Gabriel shrugs. “Who says I didn’t buy these?”

Castiel opens his mouth to say something, but pauses.

Gabriel grins. “Exactly,” he says triumphantly.

Sam shakes his head exasperatedly, a smile on his face. “Well, since it’s apparently tomorrow already.” He looks pointedly at Gabriel. “I think I’m gonna go check on things.” He stands up and moves towards the door.

Castiel gets a vaguely confused look on his face. “Aren’t you going to stay here with us?”

Sam pauses, an indecipherable look coming over his face. “Oh. Um, you guys don’t have to . . .” he trails off uncomfortably.

Castiel turns to Gabriel. “Does he remember?”

Gabriel shakes his head. “Little too drunk for that, Cassy.”

Sam flushes and Castiel stands up and walks over to him. The Angel raises two fingers and asks, “Do you mind?”

Sam eyes him warily before sighing. “No,” he says quietly.

Castiel nods and presses his two fingers against Sam’s forehead. A few seconds later, he withdraws them and Sam gasps, his eyes growing wide.

It takes him a bit to piece together what Castiel had shown him, but when it finally hits, he freezes.

Castiel and Gabriel give him a concerned look.

“You alright, kiddo?”

Sam snaps out of it and shakes his head, putting on a fake smile. “Yeah, I’m good.”

He could tell by the looks on their faces that they didn’t believe him, but he kept the smile, trying to hold together his fragile façade.

“I’ll just, uh,” Sam gestures at the door, “be going, I guess.” He reaches for the handle, but before he can, there’s a loud snap.

Sam flinches and quickly draws his hand back, turning to look fearfully at the two Angels. Gabriel’s hand was still raised.

“Sorry, Samshine. Can’t have you leaving just yet.”

Sam looks away, clenching his teeth and taking in slow, deep breaths.

“Sammy? Earth to Sasquatch?”

“What do you want from me, Gabriel?” he asks carefully, his voice shaking.

Castiel narrows his eyes slightly and tilts his head. Gabriel gives Sam a look.

“You know what we want. Cassy showed you what happened. We need to talk, Sam.”

Surprise briefly flits through Sam’s jumbled emotions, not used to Gabriel using his actual name. But it’s gone in a split second, replaced by fear and the feeling that the walls were closing in on him.

“Do we have to do it now?” he asks slowly, hunching in on himself and focusing on his breathing. It wouldn’t do well to have a panic attack right now.

Castiel keeps his calculating look and Gabriel sighs.

“If not now, we’ll never get another chance. You know that.”

Sam nods, closing his eyes and imagining himself somewhere else. An open field, a forest, the library, places he felt unconfined.

“Does it have to be here, though?” he asks carefully, his eyes still closed.

Gabriel gives him a confused look and Castiel’s eyes widen. He waves his hand and puts up an illusion around the room. Gabriel blinks and opens his mouth to ask something, but stops when Castiel leans over and whispers something in his ear. A look of surprise crosses his face before morphing into something akin to horror.

The Archangel quickly stands up and walks over to Sam.

“Hey,” he says softly. “Open your eyes.”

Sam shakes his head. “No, I can’t,” he whispers. “Not allowed.”

“Why not?”

Sam sits down and hangs his head, eyes still closed, and sighs. “Because I’m not worthy,” he says, and it sounds broken. “Not worthy, not worthy,” he repeats quietly as he hunches in on himself. “Can’t look him in the eyes, not worthy, can’t look at him. Morningstar, Light Bringer, not worthy, I’m not worthy, _you’re not worthy_.” He says the last part in Enochian, but it’s mangled. Humans weren’t meant to speak it. And it’s not directed at them.

Castiel and Gabriel exchange equally terrified looks, entirely out of their depth and unsure of what to do.

After a few seconds of consideration, Gabriel makes an executive decision. “Sam!” he says sharply. “Breathe. You’re not there anymore, he’s dead.”

“No he’s not,” Sam mutters bitterly. “He’s not, he’s always here, he always comes back, he’s already back.”

Gabriel opens his mouth to say something, but stops when Castiel places a hand on his shoulder and shakes his head. Gabriel pauses and steps back, watching as his brother sits down in front of Sam. The Angel doesn’t say anything, instead taking hold of Sam’s right hand. He flinches back, but Castiel doesn’t let go.

“Sam, listen to me,” the Angel says firmly. “Lucifer is gone.” Castiel takes Sam's right hand and uses his to press Sam's thumb against an arch shaped scar on his left hand.

Sam relaxes into the familiar touch and lets out a breath. Gabriel watches the tension melt from his shoulders, and suddenly times he'd noticed Sam do that exact same thing clicked into place and made infinitely more sense.

After a few seconds, Castiel releases his grip. “Lucifer is one problem you, or any of us, will never have to worry about again. No matter what you might see or hear. I made him go away once, and on my Father's name I will keep doing it until none of us will ever need to think of him again. I know you would all do the same for me.”

Sam nods, finally opening his eyes and glancing up. “Thanks, Cas,” he says quietly.

“You are welcome. Do you feel any better?”

Sam shrugs, looking around the room. “Yeah, I guess. Although, I do wanna know when we moved to a plains.”

Castiel glances at the illusion still on the walls. “I did that once I realized why you were acting odd.”

“Oh, thanks.”

“It was no problem.” He glances at Gabriel. “Now, I believe we have some things we need to discuss.”

Sam looks down guiltily and shifts in his seat. “Yeah . . .”

Gabriel let's out a world-weary sigh and sits down next to Sam and Castiel. “Look, I didn’t really wanna do this either, but we have to. Otherwise, your thoughts are gonna feed on your guilt complex and it’ll spiral until we can’t do anything about it. So, we’re gonna talk about it.”

“I know,” Sam mutters. “Well, let’s get on with it. Question away.”

Gabriel gives him an odd look and Castiel asks, “Why do you think we are going to leave you?”

“Because you’re Angels. Like I said earlier, you’re immortal beings that I could never begin to comprehend.” He chuckles ruefully. “It sounds stupid now that I say it out loud.”

“It’s not stupid, Sam,” Castiel says. “And I do understand where you are coming from.”

“Yeah, I get it too,” Gabriel starts. “But do you really think we’d stay around here if we didn’t want to?”

Sam shrugs, an uncomfortable look on his face. “I know. It’s just . . . one of those things, I guess. Irrational fears.” He pauses, glancing away. “And . . . you guys not asking me to help with your molt was the straw that broke the camel’s back. Cas always asks me, so I just assumed . . .” He trails off, shaking his head. “But, I shouldn’t have done that.” He chuckles ruefully. “You know what they say about assumptions.”

Gabriel chews on his lip, not looking Sam in the eyes.

Castiel gives his brother a vaguely disproving look and sighs. “Sam, the fault is on us for that. Gabriel should have told me of his reservations and I should have paid more attention.”

Sam nods absently. “Yeah,” he says quietly. After a few seconds, he asks, “So . . . you're not gonna leave?” He pauses, seemingly thinking better of himself. “I mean, I know Cas has his Heaven thing, and you might wanna get in on that, and maybe you have other-”

“Sam,” Gabriel interrupts. “We get it.”

Castiel nods. “As it happens, we like it here and we like you. So, no, we are not planning on leaving anytime soon.”

Sam nods. “And, uh . . .” he trails off uncertainly. “what about molt?” It's said quietly, so much so that if they hadn't been Angels, they would've missed it.

Castiel glances at Gabriel, who nods.

“I you would have us,” the Angel begins, “then we ask that you join us.”

Sam tilts his head in consideration. After a few seconds, he smiles and says, “Yeah.”

Gabriel grins. “Great! I think this calls for celebration.”

Sam and Castiel give him equally suspicious looks.

The Archangel laughs. “Don’t worry, it’s nothing too heinous.” He pauses. “Unless either of you are lactose intolerant.”

The suspicious looks change into bewildered ones, and Gabriel rolls his eyes. “I’m talking about ice cream, guys.”

Their eyes alight with understanding. “Oh,” Sam says. “That sounds pretty cool.”

A few seconds after the words leave his mouth, Sam realizes what he said and groans, and hangs his head.

Gabriel realizes it sooner and grins. “Didn’t know you were one for puns, Sasquatch.”

Sam half-heartedly glares at him, a small smile on his face.

Castiel chuckles and shakes his head. “I do like the sound of ice cream, brother.”

Gabriel nods, his face suddenly serious. “Then I’m gonna need the two of you to not breathe a word of what you’re about to me to anyone.”

Sam gives him a bitchface. “Gabe, it’s _ice cream_.”

“Exactly, Samshine. No other being besides myself knows where I go whenever I want some confectionery goodness, and I’d like to keep it that way.”

Castiel gives him a look and Sam rolls his eyes.

“If you don’t agree to my terms, we’re not going anywhere,” Gabriel threatens.

They sigh loudly. “Fine,” Sam says. “It’s not like we have anyone to tell anyways.”

Gabriel grins. “Great! Then let’s get going.” He and Castiel grab onto each of Sam’s arms and they all disappear with the sound of wings unfurling.

-

When Dean finally got back from the Apocalypse World, he was bone-tired. In fact, they all were, except for Jack, who seemed so peppy it had to have been a crime.

Still, they were all immensely relieved when the portal shifted into being and they went through. Dean quickly got the ingredients to close it and watched as the rift sealed shut.

Mary lets out a sigh of relief and sits down in one of the chairs.

“Okay,” Dean starts. “I’m gonna go find Sam and Cas. You should all get showers and sleep.”

They nod and Dean starts walking to Sam’s room. He’d been surprised that his brother hadn’t been in the library reading or something, but if he was sleeping instead, Dean wouldn’t complain.

He was surprised, however, when he carefully opened the door to Sam’s room and saw Castiel and Gabriel curled up on the bed with his brother.

Castiel looks up and his eyes widen in surprise. He glances at Sam and Gabriel before carefully extracting himself and quietly walking over and closing the door behind him as he went out of the room.

Dean gives him look of askance and Castiel shakes his head, pointing to the library. Dean nods and starts walking, Castiel following close behind.

When they got there, Mary, Jack, and Ketch were gone and the library was empty.

Dean turns to Castiel and gives him a bewildered look. “So, uh, what was that?”

“We were sleeping,” Castiel replies simply.

“In the same bed?”

Castiel tilts his head and gives him a confused look. “Yes,” he says slowly. “I fail to see what you’re so upset about.”

Dean gestures his arms vaguely. “Why? I mean, I know you don’t understand personal space or anything, but that’s just . . .” He trails off, at a loss for words.

“Sam, Gabriel, and myself have issues with nightmares, so we thought that it would be best if none of us slept alone.”

Dean perks up. “Oh yeah, why was Gabriel there? You guys kept him around?”

Castiel gives him a hard look. “I could not abandon my brother any more than you would yours.”

Dean blinks in surprise. “Jeez. Touchy, touchy,” he mutters. “So, is he okay? Good to go and all that?”

Castiel gives him a mildly confused look. “He is . . . better than he was. I’m not sure what you mean, but I assume the answer is maybe.”

“Great. So, when’s he gonna be leaving?”

Castiel keeps his confused look. “I . . . do not think he plans on leaving anytime soon. He hasn’t mentioned anything to me.”

“Why not? He’s better, so he doesn’t need to stay.”

 Castiel glares at him. “If he does not want to, he does not have to. Besides, it has been nice having him here.”

Dean huffs a laugh and shrugs. “Whatever you say. Well, I’m gonna go catch a shower and get some shut-eye. You can go back to your sleep-orgy or whatever,” he says, walking away.

Castiel lets out a sigh and goes back to Sam’s room, carefully crawling back on the bed.

-

That morning when Gabriel wakes up, he sees someone watching him. He didn’t know who this someone was, but there was one thing almost instantaneously recognizable about them.

“Nephil!” he exclaims, shocking Castiel and Sam awake.

It regards him with confusion as Sam and Castiel try to calm Gabriel down.

“Brother, it’s alright,” Castiel says. “This is Jack.”

Jack smiles and waves a hand in greeting.

Gabriel’s eyes widen in surprise.

“I’ve told you about him, remember? Dean got back last night with him, Mary, and Ketch.”

Gabriel nods and closes his eyes, taking a deep breath. “Sorry. He just took me by surprise.”

Jack looks at him in confusion. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to.”

Gabriel nods. “It’s alright. Just, try not to watch people while they sleep. Cassy can tell you _all_ about that.”

Castiel glares half-heartedly at his brother. “Maybe later. Perhaps we should see how everyone is doing.”

Gabriel rolls his eyes. “Ugh, fine. Not that I want to listen to some boring story about another universe, but fine.”

Sam scoffs and gets up. He stretches before grabbing Gabriel’s arm and dragging him out of bed. “You don’t even have to listen if you don’t want to. Just be polite.”

“But _why_ ,” he whines, righting himself.

“Because if you don’t, Dean won’t like you.”

“He already doesn’t like me.”

“He won’t like you more.”

Gabriel rolls his eyes. “You’re lucky you’re cute,” he mutters, walking out the door.

Sam sighs and walks after him.

Castiel shakes his head before facing Jack. “How have you been?” he asks pleasantly.

Jack pauses. “Well enough. We managed to kill Michael and help everyone get organized.”

Castiel nods. “That’s good. I’m just glad you’re all back, it’s been months.”

“Yeah. As . . . interesting as that place was, it’s nice to be back.”

“Well, I am glad you are.”

Jack smiles. “Thanks.”

“You are welcome. Now, I think we should go make sure Gabriel and Dean don’t kill each other.”

-

Thankfully, Dean was only shooting Gabriel dirty looks, so Castiel didn’t have to intervene. Sam, on the other hand, kept glancing between the two of them with a look of apprehension.

“And then Jack snuck up and stole Michael’s Blade, right before killing him,” Mary says proudly.

Jack looks away, an almost sheepish look on his face.

Gabriel grins and pats him on the back. _“Nice job kid.”_

Everyone but Sam and Castiel blink in surprise. Dean narrows his eyes and Castiel sighs.

“Uh, anyways,” Mary says. “That’s basically what happened. After that, we spent another day or so sorting things out before going back to the rift.”

Sam nods. “I’m just glad you’re all back. It’s been quiet around here.”

Dean nods, then pauses. “Yeah, by the way, what have you guys been doing these past few months?”

Sam, Castiel, and Gabriel glance at each other, an unspoken conversation passing.

“Oh, not much,” Castiel says with feigned nonchalance.

“We did get the library and artifact rooms mostly organized,” Sam brings up.

“Rowena’s been hanging around here for the past couple weeks,” Gabriel adds.

Dean blinks. “Wait, Rowena? Where is she now?”

Sam shrugs. “Out. She hasn’t been here 24/7.”

Dean opens his mouth to say something, but instead lets out a breath and shakes his head. “Y’know what, I’m not even gonna,” he mutters. “So, you guys basically just hung around here nerding out over the Bunker?”

Gabriel glares at him. _“Hey, I resent that,”_ he says petulantly. _“We did more than that.”_

Dean gives Gabriel an unimpressed look, then glances at Castiel. “Can he speak English? Did he forget or somethin’?”

Castiel opens his mouth to say something, but stops when Gabriel quickly signs, ‘No!’

Sam notices and sighs. “He . . . y’know what, it’s complicated.”

Dean rolls his eyes. “Well, I guess this means we’re gonna have to do a lot of hunting to catch up with what you guys missed.”

Sam winces. “Uh, yeah. We’ve been . . . busy.”

“I can tell,” Dean deadpans.

Mary chuckles. “Well, I’ll be glad to join you boys when you do.”

Sam blinks in surprise, his eyes widening. “Uh, that sounds great,” he says, giving a small smile.

“Yep,” Dean says. “So, who’s ready for lunch? I trust you guys still have some edible things around here?”

“Yeah,” Sam says, giving Gabriel and urgent look.

The Archangel rolls his eyes and snaps his fingers as Dean opens the fridge.

“Ah, perfect,” he says, taking out a thing of ground beef. “Who wants burgers?”

“I do,” Jack and Mary excitedly say in sync.

Dean chuckles and starts pulling more ingredients out of the fridge. “Sam, Cas, how about you?”

“We’re good,” Sam says before Castiel could speak.

Dean shakes his heads and mutters something about ‘vegetarian hippie brother’ and ‘where did I go wrong’.

Sam rolls his eyes and Castiel gets a mildly confused look on his face.

-

Later that night finds Sam, Gabriel, and Castiel in the library. Dean was out at a bar enjoying being back in civilization, while Mary and Jack were off bonding somewhere. None of them knew where Ketch had gotten, and they weren’t particularly keen to find out.

Gabriel had decided that the best thing to do with his spare time was annoy Sam and Castiel while they read and discussed things they read. Mostly because he didn’t have anything else to do since Rowena had declined his invitation to help her with whatever she was doing at the moment.

Sadly, Sam and Cassy were pretty nonchalant about his tricks and weren’t paying him any attention.

After a few more minutes of fruitless toying with them, Gabriel lets out a loud, dramatic sigh and looks off in a random direction, a bored look on his face. Sam and Castiel don’t respond, so he does it again.

Sam lets out a breath and hangs his head. “What is it, Gabe?” he asks, almost regretfully.

Gabriel grins. “Why Sammy, I’m glad you asked. So, I’ve had a lot of time to think these past few hours—”

“Always a good thing,” Castiel mutters.

“And I’ve decided we need a coming out party,” Gabriel says, with a mischievous look that neither Sam or Castiel liked.

Sam pauses, a confused look coming over his face. “Coming out of what?”

“The closet, my dear Sasquatch, where else?”

Castiel furrows his eyebrows and Sam’s eyes widen.

Encouraged by their silence, Gabriel continues. “I was thinking pink, yellow, and blue, but we can do something else if you want. I’m talkin’ streamers, balloons, banners, the whole nine,” he says, each item appearing as he lists them.

Sam looks around the room in horror and Castiel eyes the items considerably.

“We can’t do that!” Sam exclaims, a frantic note creeping into his voice.

“Why not?” Gabriel asks, the decorations disappearing.

“Because . . .” Sam starts, trying to find the right words. “Dean would freak out.”

Gabriel pauses. “So?”

Sam blinks. “So . . . we can’t do that, Gabe,” he says firmly.

“Just ‘cause your idiot brother wouldn’t like it doesn’t mean anything,” Gabriel says, shrugging. “He’d get over it.”

“Have you met Dean? He’d try and kill you the second he could.”

Gabriel scoffs. “Yeah, tell him good luck with that.”

Sam gives him a look. “He would find a way. Or just use Holy Oil to trap you and do God knows what.”

An indecipherable look comes over Gabriel’s face and he shifts uncomfortably in his seat, glancing away.

Castiel takes this opportunity of silence and says, “Sam, while I do not think your brother would have a . . . good reaction, you cannot keep this hidden from him.”

Sam pauses. “Well . . . I don’t know what else to do.”

Castiel shrugs. “I do not either, but you cannot remain indecisive. I suggest that you tell him, but you should be aware of the ramifications.”

“I am aware of them, Cas. That’s why I don’t want to in the first place.”

“Cassy has a point,” Gabriel points out. “He will find out eventually.”

“Then tell me what we’re supposed to do?”

Gabriel shrugs and Castiel gets a considerable look on his face.

“Well . . .” the Angel starts. “You could get him used to the idea of it.”

Sam and Gabriel give him equally confused looks.

“By that, I mean that you need to allude to it in various ways.”

“I . . . don’t think that’d work, Cassy,” Gabriel says skeptically.

Castiel tilts his head in consideration. “Perhaps, but you do not really have any other choice.”

“He has a point,” Sam says.

Gabriel groans. “I like my party idea better, but if you two wanna do something else, then fine. It really is sad though, I plan some pretty epic parties.”

Sam rolls his eyes and Castiel shakes his head.

Gabriel gets an affronted look on his face. “Hey, I do. And you guys would know it if you weren’t so down to Earth.”

“It is probably best we are, since you seem to need someone to make sure you do not do anything stupid,” Castiel points out.

Gabriel opens his mouth to say something, but pauses. “You’re still no fun,” he mutters petulantly, looking away.

Sam and Castiel both laugh before going back to their books while Gabriel sulks in his chair.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also, anyone who's also following Descent of the Archangel, I'm sorry I haven't posted the next chapter yet, but I've just been really busy with college and school and this chapter, so I hope you can forgive me. Sorry again for the long wait!

**Author's Note:**

> Review, please! They're the stuff that keeps writers happy and healthy. (Plus it's also incentive to write more chapters. *Wink wink, nudge nudge*)


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